


Drabbles of Sabine Wren

by Ciryc_Tal, foxsykitsune



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Fluff, Sabezra - Freeform, some romantic some not
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-01
Updated: 2017-10-18
Packaged: 2018-09-03 12:58:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 51,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8714833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ciryc_Tal/pseuds/Ciryc_Tal, https://archiveofourown.org/users/foxsykitsune/pseuds/foxsykitsune
Summary: Short snippets of Sabine's life. Maybe some Sabezra...still not sure if I truly ship them. Will include fluffy Sabezra just for kicks and giggles. Some angst as well.





	1. Dark Side Worries

Sabine had never seen Ezra flirt before…correction…she’d seen him flirt with her…not another girl.

They were in a shady cantina looking for one of Hera’s contacts for a supply run, when a vaguely pretty girl around their same age started talking to Ezra.

Sabine watched in disgust as the girl twirled long strands of chocolate hair around her finger and bit at her ruby lip seductively. Whatever Ezra had said next made the girl giggle and reach out a hand to his chest.

Sabine felt her teeth clench and had an inexplicable urge to punch the girl right in her cute little dimpled smile.

She turned away. They were supposed to be discreet, but there he was across the room flirting with some floozy like he wasn’t on a mission.

“If you like him so much you should tell him.” A gruff voice interrupted her scowling.

Her attention turned to the bartender that had spoken. He was an older man with gray patched hair and matching beard.

“Excuse me?” she questioned sardonically.

The man smirked “You’re clearly jealous of that girl in the corner with the boy.” The man's voice crackled in amusement. 

Sabine scoffed trying to keep her composure “You must be mistaken.” She could never be jealous of something like that.

 The bartender started stacking glasses and shrugged “Think whatever you want, but you’ve been staring at them ever since she said hi to him.”

Sabine shook her head. She couldn’t just say outright that she was upset because they were on a mission for the rebellion and he was losing focus. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

The man laughed “Well, judging by your armor, you’re Mandalorian. I’ve never heard of a Mandalorian that just quit and gave up on something they wanted. I thought you were fighters.”

She glared at the man, who was clearly trying to insight a rise out of her “I don’t quit, I always fight for what I want, but here’s the catch, I don’t want him.” she pressed a fist firmly to the counter between them.

She watched the older man glance over her shoulder presumably at Ezra and the little fluff that was flirting with him. “Honey, you can lie to yourself all you want, but you’ll find that I’m not so easy to fool. Your companion over there isn’t all that interested in her by the way. He’s been glancing back here to you, meaning he’s probably only flirting to make you jealous and I’d say it’s working.”

She rolled her eyes and then suddenly something hit her. Companion? “Wait. How did you know we knew each other?” her hand twitched towards her blaster. They had entered separately to maintain cover so it was highly suspicious that he would know.

“Your boss said to be on the lookout for two young kids with attitude to contact me. You also fit the description she gave.” He smirked at her surprised look. “I may not seem like much, but I can help you.”

He pulled a data tape from his pocket subtly and slipped it into her hand unseen. “Here is what your boss wanted. Now, go get what you want.”

She pulled away as if in disgust “No thanks, he’s not my type.” She slipped the information into her pocket smoothly and turned to look at Ezra.

“Whatever you say.” The man cajoled and sighed, mumbling something about stubborn love as he went back to his work.

The girl had slid closer to Ezra and was tracing a finger over his scarred cheek. Sabine felt a wave of protectiveness start to build. Why was she touching him? He was clearly uncomfortable as he flinched away from the girl’s touch. Time to rescue the kid.

She paused. No, he wasn’t quite a kid anymore. He was taller than her now, with short hair and a more mature frame. He was trying so hard to be grown up that sometimes he missed the point. She smirked to herself as he looked towards her and raised his eyebrows.

The girl next to him had indeed become very touchy.

Sabine looked back at the bartender and nodded in gratitude before marching forwards. “Excuse me.” She started, placing her hands on her hips. “Could you get your desperate paws off my friend?” she addressed the other girl.

“Friend?” the girl snarked, looking Sabine up and down “Just cuz you want a piece of this doesn’t mean I’ll just give him to you.”

Ezra chuckled nervously “Uh, I think it’s time for me to go.” He tried to move away from her, but the girl snapped her attention back to him, grabbing his arm and halting his retreat.

“But what about all the fun we’re going to have?” she pouted.

Sabine laughed mirthlessly “Oh believe me, he has enough fun without you.”

The girl placed a hand on Ezra’s cheek “Oh I bet he does, but I’ll wager I can do things to him that you little Mando whore have never dreamed of.”

Sabine was about to snap back when Ezra suddenly scooted away from the girl removing her grip from him in the process. “Yeah…” he stood “Look, I appreciate the offer, but we really have to leave.”

The girl leaned back in the booth “Too bad. She’s probably all fight and no affection. You can come back if you want a real woman, not a brute. She’d never be able to touch you like I could.”

Ezra opened his mouth, but Sabine shoved him towards the doors before he could speak. They hurried from the cantina and Sabine stole glances at Ezra’s blushing face, trying not to show how amused she was at his embarrassment.

“So…” he cleared his throat hastily “did you find out anything?”

She hummed “More than you did I bet.” She tapped her pocket “I’ve got info on what I’m guessing will be the pickup coordinates for our supplies.”  

He was silent and she sneaked another look at him. He seemed tense, hands in his pockets and a scowl on his face.

She nudged him with her elbow “What’s wrong? Mad that I interrupted your potential _fun_ with a real woman?”

He scoffed “No…I mean…” he turned his face away from her “I’m sorry she said those things about you. She had no right to say that.”

Sabine was surprised. “Ezra, that wasn’t the first time I’ve been insulted and it probably won’t be the last. I’m fine really. I don’t care what people say about me.”

He stopped suddenly, grabbing her hand and pulling her down a small alleyway to avoid the crowd. “But I do Sabine.” He gripped her shoulders as he spoke. His gaze burned intensely into her own and she felt her cheeks heating up. “I don’t know what I have to do to show you that I care what happens to you and the others.”

She shrugged him off and took a step away “I know you care about us Ezra, but I’m a big girl. I don’t need you freaking out over every little thing that happens to me.” He looked away guiltily and mumbled something under his breath while he scowled and clenched his fists. “Ezra who are you?”

He turned back to her in obvious confusion. “What do you mean?”

“I mean you’ve changed. Ever since Malachor you’ve been…” The abrupt fury in his eyes halted her speech.

“Don’t.” he growled “I don’t want to talk about it.”

Her eyebrows knit in concern “Maybe you should.” Ezra shrugged, but remained silent as she stared him down.

He made to move past her, but she was sick of his avoidance routine and shoved him against the alley wall. Her arms held him in place while her fists knotted in his collar. “Ezra Bridger you’re being stubborn.”

“Oh? And what are you being?!” He snapped. “I told you I don’t want to talk about it!” He tried to wrestle her away.

“Ezra!” she pushed harder with her wrists “You always say you care about us and you want to protect us, I understand that! You also said you were my friend, so why won’t you let me in?!” She could feel his heart hammering against his ribcage, but wasn’t sure if adrenalin or her proximity played a role in its quickened pace.

He looked surprised and glanced around as if to see if anyone was watching them. “Sabine, stop. You’re being…”

She didn’t let him finish “Ezra you’re going to tell me right now what’s going on with you. I can’t take seeing you like this. It's like…” she hesitated and stepped away releasing him. “Like you’re a different person.”

His gaze hit the ground and he took a deep breath. “I’ve told you, nothing is going on.”

She clicked her tongue to her teeth shortly. “You know what, fine! Don’t tell me anything. Just continue turning into a jerk for all I care.”

She sped out into the main street and didn’t look back. He was so difficult sometimes.

Ever since he and Kanan came back from their mission to Malachor something had been off. Ezra had taken Ahsoka’s loss and Kanan’s injury personally. Kanan had withdrawn from the crew and that had hurt Ezra even more. Sabine could only watch as Ezra changed. She had seen how Kanan being gone all the time effected Hera, but at least she hadn’t started lashing out at everyone like Ezra had.

Hera had tried to justify his attitude as simply hormonal changes. Sabine wanted to believe her, but it nagged at her again and again that something else was causing this to happen.

She didn’t know a lot about the force, but from what Kanan and Ezra had discussed, and her own research, she knew they had gone into a place ruled by the dark side. She didn’t know exactly what that meant, but it was constantly a figure in her mind when she tried to figure out what was happening to the young Jedi.

She hated the sound of it…dark side…

She’d heard the stories of ancient dark side users in Mandalorian history. She’d also heard from her mother how a dark sider named Maul had briefly held her planet as his own with his shadow collective.

If Ezra was starting to become one…but then again she wasn’t sure of the process. Could a Jedi become a darksider?

 If the Mandalorian word for them was to be taken literally than yes… dar'jetii… no longer a Jedi…

Was Ezra…still a Jedi? She quickly pushed the thought away.

Arriving back at the spaceport she boarded the Ghost and passed off the info to Hera.

“Where’s Ezra?” Hera asked while clicking the data tape into her reader.

“I don’t know.” Sabine folded her arms “Probably out being moody somewhere.”

Hera glanced at her “You know, you’re not exactly a constant ray of sunshine yourself right?”

Sabine flopped down beside her. “Hera, I don’t understand what’s going on with him. One second we were fine, joking around like before and then we split up to go into the cantina.” She took a breath wondering if she should even tell Hera this. “He seemed okay, even started flirting with some little…” Sabine growled and caught Hera’s look change to that of amusement. She cleared her throat and continued “Anyway, we ended up arguing and he became defensive and secretive so I left him behind.”

Hera nodded thoughtfully “What were you arguing about? I hope it wasn’t about his flirting. You said you didn’t like him like that.” Hera’s lips tightened in a sly smile.

Sabine rolled her eyes. “No, I didn’t get mad because he was flirting.” She felt a slight discomfort in the knowledge that she had in fact gotten a little frustrated. But only a little. “I asked him about Malachor.”

Hera’s eyes widened. “Sabine…that’s…”

“I know, I know, it was a difficult experience, but I just thought…” She paused as the cockpit door opened and Ezra stood before them.

Sabine suddenly felt nervous. Had he heard her talking about him? She saw the dark look on his face and felt the slightest twinge of fear.

“Well, good work you two.” Hera spoke up “These coordinates are what we needed. Go get some rest before the pickup.” She smiled warmly and stood, reaching out to Ezra and placing a hand on his shoulder. “Tell Zeb we’ll be leaving soon.”

“Alright.” He shrugged and retreated towards his room.

Sabine waited till Ezra was gone before turning back to Hera.

“I think we should talk about this later.” Hera suggested “After you get some rest.” The look on her face was clearly one of telling Sabine not to object.

“Right.” The young Mandalorian retreated to her room and locked her door behind her. Sighing, she climbed into her bunk and threw her arm over her eyes.

Had she really just been afraid of Ezra?

No, she reasoned, she knew better than that. Fear of hurting his feelings, yes, fear of him, no.

Or so she hoped.

She removed her boots, tossing them aside with her gauntlets, but once she got to her armor she paused.

Her armor was her second skin, she felt secure in it. She flopped down again and stared at her colorful ceiling. She felt too uneasy to remove her shell. It wasn’t long till she’d just have to put it on again anyway.

She knew trying to sleep wasn’t going to be fruitful, and she quickly found her overactive artist’s mind wandering to the bartender’s words to her.

Ezra only flirted to make her jealous?

Seemed probable.

She was jealous and wanted him?

No way.

She sighed again heavily. She couldn’t see herself in love with him…could she be like Kanan and Hera with him?

Then again, Kanan and Hera weren’t the most typical model of a romantic relationship ever.

In fact, she couldn’t recall any lover’s relationships that she’d been witness to long enough to want to make a role model of.

She knew what love was…at least she imagined she did. She figured that love was akin to the willingness to sacrifice your life for someone else. Something that you felt so deeply you were unable to deny it. You would be concerned with someone’s wellbeing above your own basically. Romantic love would be the same, but she imagined she would want to marry that person if she loved them so deeply.

She had been raised on a world that expected marriage to be for life.

Sabine longed for that kind of connection. Someone who would always be there for her no matter what. It wouldn’t matter how far apart they were, they would still be one.

She admitted to herself that she did care for Ezra and she did invest in his wellbeing…but to want to be his…for life…

The thought made her stomach clench.

Before, she would never have even considered him as an option, but they had grown closer in the past year.

Now, however, their dynamic was changing again. He was worrying her. What was happening to him? Was this really just teenage hormones?

She’d been through it so she knew how grumpy and awful one could be, but this seemed so much deeper.  Kanan not being around didn’t help either. Their family was falling apart.

Her throat tightened.

No. Not again….

She took a few deep breaths to calm herself down.

She’d been a runaway, she’d been abandoned, but she’d also been loved, and accepted. She didn’t want to lose her family again….

She had left her mother behind to escape the Empire’s clutches, and she’d been abandoned by a girl she considered a sister.

Then, out of nowhere, she’d been accepted and practically adopted by Kanan and Hera, and she didn’t want to see it disappear.  

Not again.

Things seemed to be working out eventually though. She’d reunited with her sisterly friend Ketsu and knew she was working with the rebellion as well. Sabine had hope that Kanan would rejoin them and Ezra would become normal again.

But there was still one more piece missing.

She wondered where her mother was.

What would her mother say about her new family? What would she say about Ezra? History could definitely tell her what Mandalorians typically thought of Jedi. And she herself had been a little taken aback at finding out Kanan was one. But now she accepted it, and respected it even. Would her mother think the same way?

“Why do I care?” she groaned frustrated, turning to shove her face into her pillow. “Not like I want to marry Ezra anyway.” She mumbled into the cushion. “Right?”

Sabine let out another sound of annoyance before getting out of her bunk. Reaching for her sketchbook, she settled down to draw, and hopefully distract herself from all the worries that nipped at her mind.

“He’ll be ok.” She whispered to herself watching curves and lines take shape under her steady hand.

They would all be ok…

She hoped.

......

 

.......

ATTENTION!!! My friend wrote an amazing companion fic to this from Ezra's point of view. Check it out [HERE](http://archiveofourown.org/works/9306710/chapters/21092258)


	2. Family Dynamics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sabine, haunted by nightmares, is comforted by an understanding source.

 

"Train your sons to be strong but your daughters to be stronger." – Mandalorian saying.

 

She had wondered what had happened to her mother.

She knew leaving the academy would cast a light of suspicion on her. The Empire would investigate Sabine's disappearance and her home would be the first place they went. She also knew her mother was strong. As strong as she hoped to be one day, and perhaps even more stubborn than that.

She would be fine. That had always been Sabine’s thought.

However, when Gar Saxon had told her of her mother’s alignment to the Empire, doubt was thrown in to the mix of her thoughts. Did her mother do that for her? So that if she was caught, her mother would know and be able to find her? She could understand that her mother would be safer allied with the Empire, but for how long?

Sabine realized, now more than ever, the fact that everything she did had a ripple effect on what happened to others.

At least her actions today had gained the respect and partnership of Fenn Rau. She could add that to her accomplishments list, if she had one.

She yawned and turned over in her bunk, wincing as her shoulder gave a twinge. It had been a long day.

Shutting her eyes she slipped into a restless sleep full of fitful dreams. Some were teasingly pleasant ones of her childhood or her early times at the academy. Others were more recent and quite jarring.

She awoke with a start and sat up, hissing in pain as her shoulder once again caused her pain. She’d dreamt that Ezra had fallen when her grip on him had slipped midflight. Just like earlier that day, only there was no Chopper to catch him this time.

She took a deep breath, laying down gingerly. He was fine. It didn’t really happen.

That wouldn’t keep her stomach from feeling sick at the thought though. What if something had happened? What if Rau hadn’t come back?

Would they be killed on the spot or given to the Empire? She had no idea what they’d do to a Jedi except give him to an inquisitor, but she wasn’t sure any of those still existed. Saxon had offered to spare her in return for loyalty to him and the Empire, but she’d already tried that route. She pushed away thoughts of the imperial academy and what had happened to her there.

No use in digging up the past, she told herself, and tried to get back to sleep.

Worry started to chew at her again, like a teething pup that had found a good shoe. All this anxiety wouldn’t do her any good. She would usually turn to her art to calm her nerves, but her body begged her to stay lying down. Physically and mentally exhausted she didn’t think any art right now would be very noteworthy.

She closed her eyes and thought about the good times she’d had in her life. It served to keep the threat of doom and dread from overshadowing her and lulled her into a comforting atmosphere.

After dozing once more and being jerked awake by a dream of Ezra falling, Sabine decided sleep wasn’t a good thing after all.

Hauling her tired form out of her bunk she made her way to the ship’s galley.

She was surprised to find another figure already sitting at the small table.

Zeb’s mass was hunched at the table, nursing a bottle of something alcoholic from what she could detect.

“Drinking alone?” she asked sliding softly into the seat across from him.

He smirked at her “We all have our outlets. You look like you could use one too.”

She nodded pulling her feet up to sit cross legged “Yeah, I keep having dreams about today.”

He cocked his head “What happens in them?” he inquired, taking another drink.

She bit her lip hesitantly “Ezra doesn’t make it.”

“Well, we all have our fantasies.” He winked.

She chuckled lightly “Zeb, you know you’d be sad to lose him.”

The purple Lasat shook his head “You’re right. I guess the kid grew on all of us.”

She looked down at the table between them. “I just keep seeing him fall down the canyon and I can’t catch him in time.” She closed her eyes and tried to erase the vision of it from her mind.

She heard movement and looked up to see Zeb returning to the table with another glass. He poured a bit of his bottle into it and pushed it toward her. “Here, don’t tell Hera I supplied you though.”

“Thanks Zeb.” She smiled warmly and took a sip, feeling the tang across her palate. She swallowed quickly and took a breath. “So, what are you awake for?”

“Old memories.” He gruffed.

She nodded in understanding and placed a hand on his warm forearm. “You know you’re not alone right? I’m here for you. I always will be.”

He engulfed her hand with one of his own larger ones “Same goes for me to you alright?”

She nodded “Of course, we’re family aren’t we?”

Zeb really had become like a big brother to her in their years together. “Well with your hair like that, you do match me.” He smiled.

She twisted a few strands of pale and purple between her fingers “Well I am your little sister, so obviously I had to look a bit like you.”

She grinned at him and he raised his drink. “To our family.” He pronounced.

She raised her own, clinking them softly together “Our family.”

Warmth spread through her as she drank and she couldn’t tell if it was her sisterly devotion to Zeb or the alcohol taking effect.

“I’ll tell you one thing.” He snickered “We’re definitely the weirdest mix of family I’ve ever seen.”

Their conversation dragged on and soon she felt exhausted once more. She rubbed at her shoulder lightly trying to focus on speaking, but her cup being empty and her eyelids drooping signaled that she should probably get some sleep.

Zeb detected her fatigue and stood. “Come on, let’s get you back to bed.” He helped her stand and picked her up fully in his massive arms.

She giggled. “Zeb, I’m not a child.” 

“You’re small enough to be one.” He quipped and entered her room. “No colorful surprises this time?” He asked, referring back to a time she’d set up paint traps to deter Ezra from snooping.

“Not today.” she mumbled.

He placed her in her bunk and ruffled her colored hair gently. “Sleep well little one.”

She smiled in gratitude “You too.”

Once he had disappeared behind her door she closed her eyes, slipping into a much needed dreamless sleep.


	3. Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set in the future. 10-12 years After the fall of the Empire.

 

Sabine was alert, listening to the sounds of someone entering her ship. She had hopes that it was someone familiar. After all, only a few people had the access codes, but just in case… She grabbed her blaster and tucked it under her pillow, waiting for the intruder to make known who they were.

She couldn’t imagine any of her family finding her here. She hadn’t even told Hera where she was going.

Light footsteps approached her room and the door hissed open. She tightened her grip on the weapon and steadied her breathing.

The trespasser neared the bunk and she felt a puff of breath on her face. She tensed ready to use her blaster when suddenly a whisper caught her off guard.

“Sabine.”

The voice was familiar.

She sat up quickly and turned towards him. “EZRA?!”

He was kneeling next to the bunk a smile across his face. “Hey, I found you.”

She launched herself at him, hugging him close to her. “How?” a tear slid down her cheek. “I thought you were…” He had been gone for so long with no contact with anyone that she had assumed the worst.

He shifted to sit on the bunk with her. “Hey, hey, I’m fine. You don’t need to worry about me.” He brushed the tear away with his thumb.

“What happened? Why did you disappear? I almost shot you!” She pulled her blaster from her pillow to show him.

He laughed “Good thing I didn’t just try and crawl into bed then.” He paused looking her over and placing a kiss on her forehead “I missed you so much.”

She eagerly accepted his lips on hers and trailed small kisses over his scarred cheek. “You still haven’t answered me.” She murmured against his skin.

“What?” he drew back looking confused.

“How did you find me?” she asked gazing into his sapphire eyes.

He took her hand in his and placed it against his chest. “I can feel you in here. I let the force guide me back to you.” He smiled “Hey, is that a new color scheme?” He added jovially, running his fingers over her red-orange-yellow hair.

She ignored the comment “Why didn’t you come back to me sooner?” She felt the pang of loss in her heart, the feeling she felt when they had said he’d gone missing.

“I couldn’t. I was working on something important I couldn’t let anyone know where I was.” He shook his head “Believe me I wanted to. Every day I wanted to.”

She pulled away from him. “Why didn’t you say something before you vanished?” feelings of betrayal stabbed at her mind.

He closed his eyes “Because I didn’t know it was going to happen till that moment.” He looked at her again “I knew you’d be alright. I knew that I could always come back to you. I had faith that things would remain the same between us.”

She bit her lip “What if things have changed?” She watched confusion and sorrow chase across his features.

“What do you mean Sabine?” His voice was strained in desperation. “You still love me don’t you?”

She didn’t answer right away “Yes. I love you Ezra.”

“Please don’t say there’s someone else.” He begged.

She sighed and moved out of the bunk, holding out a hand to him. “I’ll show you.”

He took it hesitantly and followed her. She led him to the next room over and entered, pausing in the door way. Dim light from the hall way poured into the space, illuminating a small crib.

“She’s yours.” Was all Sabine could say.

Ezra slowly approached the sleeping infant, gazing down at her in awe. “How old is she?” he questioned still staring at the child.

“Six months.” Sabine hugged her arms around herself, still trying to get used to him being back.

“What’s her name?” he reached a hand down to caress the child’s mess of blue-black hair.

Sabine smiled softly “Her name is Mira.”

“You named her after my mother?” Ezra whispered breathlessly.

He turned to look at Sabine and she nodded. “I figured that’s what you would want.” She didn't want to say that she'd done it to honor his family as a tribute to his death.

“Oh Sabine, she’s perfect. Can I hold her?” He asked nervously, looking back to the baby.

Sabine chuckled “She’s your daughter Ezra. Of course you can hold her.”

When he hesitated for too long she moved forward, gingerly picking up Mira and placing her in his arms.

She watched his eyes water and a smile bloom on his face. “Mira. I can’t believe this.” He laughed quietly. “Do the others know?”

Sabine nodded “I found out the week after you were reported missing.” Sabine told him. “That was the hardest day of my life Ezra.”  She felt her chest clamp and tears threaten to spill.

His features knitted with concern. “I’m so sorry Sabine. If I had known…” he looked at the sleeping child again. “I never would’ve gone.”

Sabine put on her strong attitude once again. “I was lucky Hera was there to help me through everything. I just recently left them to be on my own again.” She reached out running a curled finger down her baby’s cheek. “Well, not exactly on my own.”

“Why didn’t you just stay near the others?” He asked studying her features.

“I just needed some time to think.” She shrugged. “I had accepted you weren’t coming back so I needed to think of what was best for Mira. I don’t know what I want for her yet.” Sabine fidgeted with her hair. “I knew that if she were near Kanan and Dawn, she’d be raised a Jedi, if she’s like you that is. I’m still not sure she is, but I also know my mother wants her to be raised in the Mandalorian tradition. I took some time away from everyone to think about her future.”

Ezra kissed Mira softly and lowered her gently back into the crib. She squirmed a little in her sleep and he smiled at her fondly. “Do I get to help you decide?”

It almost broke her heart that he would ask, but she knew why he had. “I might be open to it.” She took a deep breath. “But for now I need you to be here with me ok? No future talk, no mentions of the past, just here and now with me. Convince me you’re not going to disappear again and maybe I’ll let you be in our lives.” She sounded harsh, but she needed this assurance.

He reached out and took her in his arms, burying his face in her fiery hair. “I’ll be whatever you need, just let me stay with you.”

She latched on to him “Like I’d ever let you out of my sight again.”

He laughed and kissed her, lingering close to her and whispering against her cheek “I’m not going anywhere.”

She felt how his arms enclosed around her and breathed in his scent. Finally he was really here. She’d never let herself dream he’d come back, but now he was home, with her. “Have you seen the others yet?”

He shook his head “You deserved to be the first.”

“Well, sounds like we’re making a trip tomorrow.” She wound her arms around his neck. “I’m sure they’ll all love to see you’re ok.”

“Why tomorrow? We could spend a few days and get acquainted again.” He lowered his lips to her pulse point. Something he always had done before when asking for her love.

She sniffed “You’re lucky I’m not calling them right now. I couldn’t keep this from them that long.”

He put his forehead to hers “Alright then, tomorrow it is.” his eyes met hers and lingered longingly. 

He leaned in once more and kissed her deeply and fiercely, with a hunger that had grown over their time apart.

She responded in kind before briefly breaking away. “Ezra? While you were gone, was there ever…someone else?” She knew he was fiercely loyal, but she had to ask.

“Never!” he looked into her eyes “Was there anyone for you?”

She shook her head “No one.”

He smiled and swooped her up in his arms. She giggled lightly as he carried her back to her bunk.

Having shed his upper layers, Sabine could run her fingers over a new scar on his ribs. His hand closed over hers “I’ll tell you about it later.” He promised, pulling her fingers up to kiss them. “I’ve waited so long to see you again. Dreamed of being with you again.”

He leaned in to claim her lips, when a sudden sound broke the silence. Mira had started crying. Sabine laughed and kissed the tip of his nose “Welcome to parenthood.” She slid back out of bed to comfort the little girl, Ezra close behind her.

The next day, Sabine landed their ship near Hera and Kanan’s home. Exiting down the ramp she smiled widely as she caught sight of them. Kanan and Hera stood with their daughter Dawn, and Chopper was next to Zeb, who had apparently arrived just before she had.

“So what’s this about Sabine?” Hera asked, clear worry across her features “Why call us all together like this?” Dawn moved forward and started making faces at Mira, causing her to squeal in delight.

“I have someone aboard who’d love to see you all.” She smiled and turned back to her ship. Ezra walked down the ramp and waved “Hey guys!”

Stunned looks were shared among the crew. “Ezra!” Kanan called in surprise, obviously having sensed him and recognized the voice.

“Where have you been?” Hera’s voice wavered in uncertainty.

The tall Lasat was the first to move forward and in a quick fury, punched Ezra in the face knocking him to the ground.

“ZEB!” Sabine and Hera shouted in unison. Sabine passed Mira off to Dawn and ran at Zeb who was currently holding Ezra down on the dirt.

“DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO HER?! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH PAIN YOU’VE CAUSED HER?! NOW YOU THINK IT’S OK TO WALTZ BACK IN LIKE NOTHING EVER HAPPENED?!!!” The Lasat was still much stronger than Ezra and held him in place.

“I’m sorry I really am! I couldn’t help it!” Ezra struggled “I was on a mission for the New Republic I had to!”

“ONE WORD WAS ALL YOU NEEDED TO TELL HER! ONE WORD THAT YOU WERE ALRIGHT!” Zeb’s fury was not going to be easily quenched.

Sabine reached them followed by Kanan “ZEB STOP!! Zeb, it’s ok!” Sabine assured him. “We talked about it last night. He never knew about Mira, it’s alright!”

“Zeb.” Kanan’s voice was calm beside him “You can let him up. Let him explain to all of us.”

The proud Lasat growled once more before standing and moving away. Kanan held out a hand and Ezra took it, being pulled to his feet and into a hug. “I’m glad you’re alright.”

They broke apart “Well I was until I got hit in the face.” He joked bringing a hand up to feel the damage. He’d definitely have some bruising.

Mira had started crying at the sudden flight of her mother, but had soon been calmed by Dawn and Hera.

“I’ll tell you all what happened, but first I want to say how glad I am to see you all.” Ezra smiled. “Even you chopper.”

The droid grunted at him and Ezra made a note to stay away from him, or he might get attacked for a second time today.

He started with apologies and explanations, telling the entire story and why he couldn’t contact any of them. Eventually they were placated, including Zeb, who cracked his knuckles threateningly “You try that again and so help me…”

“I’ll never do that again believe me!” Ezra admitted hastily.

Sabine glanced around at their group feeling a little more settled that he was back for good. She slipped her hand in his and smiled at him.

Hera offered to watch Mira for them if they wanted some time to go off on their own, but Ezra wouldn’t be separated from her. He had taken so well to being a dad and adored Mira intensely.

Sabine felt that finally things were getting better. Finally things were right and she didn’t feel like running away anymore.

She had her family completed now…but…

“Ezra?” she said, a sudden thought popping into her mind. “Who’s going to tell my mother you’re alive?”

The room went silent and eyes were turned to Ezra. He chuckled nervously “Uh, can we do that not in person?”

Everyone laughed and Zeb slapped a hand across Ezra’s back “Haha, learned your lesson the first time did you?” he grinned “No one breaks Sabine’s heart and gets away with it!”

Sabine smiled, grateful at his protectiveness “I’m sure I can contact her, but we better do that together to explain what happened. Or you really will pay for what you did.” She smirked, knowing full well her mother’s warrior ferocity hadn’t faded.

Zeb spoke again “At least now you can hold this over his head forever. Need him to do something for you? Just remind him of the time he disappeared with no warning.”

She laughed “Oh I will, believe me!”

Ezra looked at her guiltily “I guess I deserve that much.” He placed a swift kiss to her temple “Sometimes I feel I don’t deserve to be back with you at all.” He admitted.

She pushed a finger into his bruised face causing him to wince. “Don’t you remember anything from our wedding vows?”

He laughed “Something about we’d always be one?”

She nodded “I can’t let you go now Ezra. I swore to be one with you, so never ever think you can’t come home to me. You’ll never be alone.”

He rested his head against hers “That means everything to me Sabine. I’m sorry I was gone for so long. I promise never to leave like that again.”

“You better not.” Sabine laughed holding tightly to him.

She knew it would take a while for them to adjust fully, but she had no doubts that this was where she was meant to be. At the end of the day she was just happy he was alive, and safely in her arms once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I borrowed some names from the fandom for the children. I loved the idea of their child being named after his mother.  
> Dedicated to Meldy-arts of tumblr!


	4. Secret Project

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ezra has a secret for Sabine.

Grabbing another brush she worked to blend the two formations of color together. She felt at ease, totally focused, in her own world, she was creating beauty. She looked to the picture she was using as a reference. The sunset of a distant planet that threw vibrant shades over its mountain ranges. She smoothed her fingers across one of the ridges she was coloring creating a hazy look to accent the planet’s foggy conditions.

A sudden tapping at her door was unexpected and extremely unwanted. She stood and fixed her best glare as she opened the door.

Ezra flinched back the moment he saw her.

Intimidation achieved, she lightened her scowl. “What?”

He looked both ways down the hallway before he started gesturing like he wanted to come in.

She raised an eyebrow in defiance and stood firm. He rolled his eyes dramatically and whispered “I have a secret to tell you!”

She was skeptical, but she did love a good tidbit of gossip. Moving aside she let him in and closed the door. “So spill.” She said watching him eye her latest work.

“This is really pretty.” He complimented leaning closer to her painting.

She moved forward pushing him back slightly. “Thanks, but that’s not why you’re here. What is it you wanted to say?”

He smirked his cocky, know it all grin and started. “Well I have a secret project that I think you would enjoy.”

She waited for the explanation, but he just smiled at her goofily.

“And?” she prompted.

“Uh…” he shrugged “That’s where this gets complicated.”

Here we go. She rolled her eyes “Just give me the details on this oh so special project. Ok?” She faked a smile to encourage him. She wanted nothing but to get back to her painting.

“Alright, but first I have to know you won’t tell anyone. Got it?” he questioned.

She nodded “Yeah, sure kid.”

He shook his head “You have to swear it.”

 He looked so serious and she chuckled. “Fine. I swear I won’t tell.”

“Ok, so remember how Zeb and I stole that TIE fighter?” he asked hastily.

“Yeah.” she smirked “The one you guys crashed?”

He gave his cocky look again “Well, what if I told you we didn’t really crash it?”

Her eye brows rose “Really? What did you do with it?”

“We hid it. That’s where you come in.” He smiled charmingly. Well, as charmingly as the fourteen year old Lothalian could. “I was thinking maybe you could uh, give it a little face lift. You know, a bit of color.”

“Hmmm.” She eyed him appreciatively “I like how you think kid.”

“So, when do you wanna start?” he asked and hastily added “But remember you can’t tell anyone, not even Zeb!”

She tilted her head “If he already knows it exists why can’t I…” He cut her off quickly.

“Because!” he laughed awkwardly “I don’t know if he’d like it painted at all, and besides…” he paused and shrugged, glancing around. “I kinda wanted this to be special just for us.”

The look of annoyance on her face must have startled him because he added “Well, for you really. I wouldn’t be doing much. I mean I’d help if you wanted, but if you didn’t want…I mean as long as I’m there I could, but I guess on the other hand…” he continued babbling and she smiled.

“Ezra.” He fell silent “Thank you.”

His face lit up “Yeah, uh I thought you might enjoy it. That’s why.” He pulled his fingers through his long blue toned hair.

She bit back a full out grin at how flustered he could get around her. Poor boy, she thought to herself. He’s got it bad for you. Hopefully he’d get over whatever crush this was soon, but while it lasted it could be fun. If it got her canvases like TIE fighters, then who was she to judge his misplaced feelings.

Still…she wondered that if by accepting his gift to her… if she was encouraging his feelings. She looked at the younger teen, studying his features.

No, she finally decided, if he wanted to like her, fine, but he’d soon figure out she wasn’t exactly open to the idea.

“So, where is this TIE of yours?” She felt herself smile, mirroring his excitement.

“I’ll show you, but we have to sneak out with your painting stuff and not let anyone catch us.” He remarked seriously.

She raised an eyebrow at him “Nothing you couldn’t do right?” She gave a wink as an extra push.

He looked surprised then elated “Yeah, yeah of course I could!” his cheeks flushed red.

She felt the tiniest bit of guilt nip at her, but it was quickly dismissed. “Then let’s go.”

Sneaking out of the Ghost went easier than expected and they made it a habit. Any time they could spare to be missing with no notice, they would leave.

“I think it’s looking pretty great.” Ezra commented, looking over their work.

“Yeah.” She agreed “This is definitely one of my better designs.” She took a moment to pause and stare at the boy that had brought her here. She smiled to herself as a feeling of fondness drifted through her.

He did this for her. Sure, he was trying to impress her because of his crush on her, but still. The fact that he’d even tell her about the TIE denoted a level of trust in her. She could have easily turned around and told Kanan or Hera, but she was honestly very motivated to keep this a secret. They had snuck out before dawn this time and he was sitting down near one of the large rocks hiding the TIE from view. The sun had just peeked over the horizon sending warm rays across the ground.

He suddenly turned his head catching her gaze. His face flushed in the sunrise “What?” he asked nervously.

She smirked “I was just wondering, it was you that said you don’t trust anyone right?”

He nodded “Yup, can’t trust anyone.” He glanced away and back to her “Why?”

She neared him and sat down next to him “Because I think you trusted me enough to tell me about this. You trusted me to paint it and not reveal it to the others. Does that mean you actually trust me Ezra Bridger?”

“Uh, well…you see…” he stammered “When I said I don’t trust anyone, that didn’t apply to you.”

She tilted her head “Just me?”

“Well no.” he admitted “I mean, I trust Hera and sort of Zeb, even though he’s a pain.” She chuckled and he continued “I don’t trust Chopper very much, but Kanan…” He looked around suddenly “Kanan!”

Sabine looked around too in panic that they'd been discovered.

“I’m supposed to be training with him!” Ezra shot up and took off. “I’ll see you later!” he called over his shoulder.

Sabine laughed watching him fade into the tall grass. “That kid.” She shook her head, feeling affection for him bloom in her chest and looked over the TIE once more. Just a few more details and she’d call it finished. Such a reckless kid… she hummed as she continued working and realized she felt truly happy.

All thanks to the kid.


	5. Visions and Voices

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by Season2 ep. 10

Something was happening to Ezra. They were at a mission briefing when suddenly he’d began to freak out. He was pointing out things no one could see and had ended up passing out on the holo-table.

Sabine stared at him as Kanan knelt next to the bunk. They’d rushed him into the Ghost and waited for him to wake up. Kanan sighed “I don’t know what’s wrong. Ezra? Ezra can you hear me?”

Nothing.

Sabine looked up at Zeb and caught the clear worry that was also on his face. He glanced at her and shook his head, denoting how confused he was as well.

Then, Ezra stirred. “Wake up!” Kanan said as the teen’s eyes opened.

He gasped and sat up.

“Woah, Ezra it’s ok. You’re safe.” Kanan tried to calm him, placing a hand on his shoulder.

Sabine felt relief that he was awake, but he still looked worse for wear. His skin had paled and shadows were clearly visible under his eyes. Had he been sleeping at all? She knew he’d had trouble in the past, but she guiltily realized she hadn’t noticed at all recently.

“You wanna tell us what’s going on?” Hera questioned, a note of concern in her voice. Ezra sat up slouching over in the bunk.

“It was Maul.” He said.

Sabine felt confused “You mean at the briefing?” What did he mean Maul?

“I saw him. He said my name. He was right behind me. I mean, he was right there.” Ezra sounded panicky.

“Kid, I was standing next to you.” Zeb said stiffly “There was nobody else there.”

“Maybe it was some kind of a Force vision.” Hera cut in sounding hopeful and looking to Kanan for his opinion.

“Mmm, maybe.” Was all the Jedi could say.

Sabine could hear the doubt in his voice and it wasn’t helping the situation.

“Ah.” Zeb growled. “If you ask me, the kid's just been working too hard.” He exited the room followed by chopper who grunted a usual witty remark.

“Chopper, stop it!” Hera scolded.

“No, Chop's right.” Ezra said still looking a bit pale. “Nap time's over. I should get back to work.”

Hera moved forward in worry. “You sure you're alright?” She really did take care of everyone in the crew.

“Hera, I feel fine.” Ezra insisted. “I just had a bad…something.” He stood. “No reason to stop the rebellion, right? Come on, Sabine. We gotta get ready for our mission.”

He left the room and she followed, but glanced back towards Hera. Catching her eye she realized that they were both just as concerned still and his proclamation that he was fine didn’t sit well with them.

“Hey, are you sure you’re alright?” She asked catching up to walk beside him.

“Sabine, I’m fine. Don’t worry about it. I’m sure I just needed some rest that’s all.” He sounded confident, and a little frustrated.

“Ezra…” Sabine had to pause as he stopped suddenly and turned to her.

“Look, I don’t know what happened, but it’s over now and we have a mission to complete, so I don’t want to talk about it.” His voice was firm and his eyes intense.

Her lips parted to speak, but she just nodded trying not to feel the hurt in her heart.

He let out a breath “I’m sorry, I just…”

“Hey.” She reached out a hand to his shoulder “It’s alright. We do need to focus on the mission.” Her fingers gave a squeeze before she withdrew. “Now, let’s go see what they’ve prepared for us.” She smiled warily.

He nodded “Thanks Sabine, I knew you’d understand.” He continued their walk into the base and it hit her. She was worried because she didn’t understand. Ezra had seen Maul. That couldn’t be a good sign even if it was just hallucinations brought on by lack of sleep.

What exactly had happened back there? She knew her worries wouldn’t do them any good right now and re-centered her thoughts. She’d just have to talk to him about it later, after their mission.

She looked over the manifest for the Ghost and didn’t like what she saw. This was nowhere near enough weaponry. “We should grab some more proton torpedoes before we leave.” She suggested.

“Huh?” Ezra looked up from the manifest. “Yeah, let’s do that.” He moved to grab a hover cart for them to use.

He still seemed a little distracted and she had to admit she was too. She’d seen Ezra have force visions before, but the fact that Maul was in them this time spooked her. She hadn’t forgotten what had happened to them because of the darksider. Even her family history gave her reasons to be wary of the Zabrak.

She just hoped they wouldn’t have to deal with him anytime soon.

Approaching the ship she was met by AP-5.

“Stop. We have all the proton torpedoes we need for this mission.” The droid droned.

Sabine felt more than a little frustrated that he was questioning her logic. “Well, not according to the weapons expert, which is me. I want two more cases of 'em loaded up.” She glanced back at Ezra.

“Why am I the last one to know about supply changes?” the cranky droid complained. “I cannot work under these conditions.”

“Ugh, it's like AP-5 and Chopper were made on the same assembly line.” Sabine said before Chopper mouthed off again. “Oh, I'm the one who needs an attitude adjustment?” She argued.

“It’s him. I…It's Maul.” Ezra stuttered rushing forward.

“Ezra?” Sabine looked for what Ezra could have been talking about. “Hey, Ezra!” He didn’t turn back “Ezra?!” her heart sank in worry. Something bad was going to happen. “Chop, go get Kanan.” She ordered before taking off after the orange clad teen.

Ezra had paused up ahead looking around before darting off again.

“Ezra, stop!” she called still trying to catch him.

“Sabine?!” she halted and turned to see Kanan approaching. “Sabine? What’s going on?”

She ran to him “Kanan something’s wrong with Ezra. He just took off for no reason.”

“We better find him before he passes out again, or worse.” Kanan said grimly.

She led him around the ships and caught sight of Ezra force pushing someone into a stack of crates. “Ezra!” she cried out in surprise before running towards him. What had happened? This wasn’t Ezra. Her heart froze as she saw him reach for his lightsaber. She ran forward shoving between him and the unfortunate man.

 “Ezra, wait!” She tried to push him back, being wary of the weapon between them. Kanan joined her and they successfully drove him away from the man.

“Let me go!” Ezra yelled angrily, pushing them both off with lightning speed and igniting the blade. She reached out, but there was nothing she could do. Thank the force that Kanan was there and he was able to put a hold on Ezra.

Sabine watched nervously as Ezra fought against Kanan’s force grip. What would happen if he broke it? How could she stop him? She couldn’t aim a shot at him with the man behind him, but she likely wouldn’t be able to shoot at him anyways. She felt helpless as the struggle continued and tried to keep her heart from going into overdrive in panic.

“Kanan! What are you doing?” Ezra shouted.

“Ezra! It's not Maul! Look at him!” Kanan warned.

Ezra looked back at the man on the ground and seeming realization came to him. Kanan was able to release him finally. 

“You're out of your mind, kid!” His almost victim struggled away from him.

“I'm sorry! I'm sorry!” Ezra closed down the lightsaber and backed up falling to one knee breathing hard. “What's happening to me?” he clenched his teeth.

Sabine moved to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. She looked nervously at Kanan, seeing that the older Jedi’s mouth was set in a frown, displaying his worry. She looked back to Ezra. His knuckles were white as he was still gripping the hilt of his weapon and his breathing was heavy. She moved her hand along his back rubbing across the fabric of his jacket in an attempt to comfort him. She paused under his shoulder blade and felt his heart hammering against her fingers.

“Come on. Let’s get you inside.” Kanan muttered taking Ezra’s arm and helping him to his feet.

They entered the base again and took Ezra straight to the medical bay. “What happened?” Hera asked upon seeing them. “Ezra are you ok?”

Sabine felt her heart pang at the look Ezra gave Hera. The young padawan looked like he was going to cry.

“I don’t know what’s going on.” His voice was strained “I don’t know what happened.”

While a medical droid checked him out, Kanan pulled Hera aside. “Hey, I need to talk to you.”

Hera glanced at Sabine “Keep an eye on him.” She said softly. Sabine nodded and watched them leave.

Looking back to Ezra she watched his eyes close and his attempt to take deep breaths to calm down.

She folded her arms over her middle, feeling uneasy. What if it happened again? What if Kanan wasn’t there to stop him next time? She shuddered at the thought and drew closer. Pulling off one of her gloves, she placed her palm gently to his forehead. He was sweating, but there was no sign of fever. Smoothing over his skin and hair she watched his eyes blink open and make contact with hers before looking away.

“I really did see Maul.” He muttered, sounding frustrated and dejected. She couldn’t blame him.

“Shhh.” She soothed “I know you did.” She continued to stroke his short hair as a comfort to him. He needed to calm down and rest.

“Physically you are sound.” The med-droid pronounced. “You are showing signs of fatigue and stress, but you are not showing any signs of deteriorated health.” Well at least that was one good thing. “I suggest we sedate you for the time being.” The droid said.

Sabine looked at Ezra who nodded solemnly at the med-droid.

She watched as it injected something into him to get him to sleep. “Thanks.” Sabine dismissed the droid and looked back down at Ezra. He still wouldn’t look at her “Ezra?”

He closed his eyes “I should rest.” He mumbled.

She placed her hand on his forehead again checking just to be sure he wasn’t fevered. She moved her hand down to his scarred cheek “You should. You’ve been missing a lot of sleep haven’t you?”

He opened his deep blue eyes and looked up at her “I’ll be ok Sabine.” He half smiled “You don’t have to worry about me.”

“I’m not worried.” She countered playfully. “Why would I be worried?”

The drug was apparently taking effect faster than he’d hoped because he hummed sleepily and lifted a hand to grasp hers. “I’ll see you when I wake up.” He slurred before tugging her hand and kissing her palm.

His grip went slack as the medicine took hold, knocking him out completely.

She stared at his sleeping form in shock. Had he just done that? Had he kissed her hand and had her heart practically vibrated in her ribs? It was just the drugs that made him do that, she reasoned and pushed it from her mind.

She took up watch by the bedside, waiting for the others to come in. Zeb was the first to show, followed by Chopper.

“Hey, I heard what happened.” He looked at Ezra’s sleeping form shaking his head “You think he’ll be ok?”

Sabine swallowed “I hope so.”

Kanan and Hera reentered the med-bay and Hera approached the bedside. “I’m taking the mission so he can stay here. Sabine, whenever you’re ready we’ll…”

Sabine broke in “Actually Hera…” She hesitated “I’d like to stay here if you don’t mind.”

Hera’s tattooed eyebrows rose in amazement “Alright.” She said. “Zeb?”

He shuffled “Yeah I’ll go. Take care of the kid Sabine. Come on Chopper.” He motioned to the astromech and they left to get ready.

Hera bent and kissed Ezra’s forehead lightly just like a real mother would have, then moved to Sabine, folding her in a hug. Sabine hadn’t wanted to acknowledge Hera as a mother at first, but now she was glad to have her.

“Take good care of him.” Hera requested before pulling away and linking hands with Kanan, leading him back outside.

Sabine sat back in her chair and sighed heavily. Things were looking dim. What was happening to Ezra and how could they fix it? She leaned against the bed and reached out to his hand slipping her own into his. “We’ll find a way out of this.” She promised to his sleeping form. His gloves had been removed and her fingers found calluses and rough patches on the young Jedi’s skin. Instantly she knew how hard he’d been working. She could clearly feel where the lightsaber hilt had hardened him during training and ran her thumb over his short clipped nails.

She swallowed and bit at her lip “Please get better.” She whispered knowing he couldn’t hear her. She felt for a moment the fear that he wouldn’t recover and that he was slipping into madness. Was this something to do with Maul or the dark side? Would he be taken over by it?

She felt her heart break at the thought of him slipping away and becoming like those inquisitors they’d encountered when they were younger. Angry, vindictive, and ruled by greed. Ezra wasn’t like that naturally, but when he’d started dabbling in the dark side knowledge, he’d changed. Luckily he’d stopped and had become more like his old self again recently, but now…

She stood and leaned over him, placing a kiss to his forehead as Hera had done.

“Don’t you dare leave.” She ordered at him, realizing that she needed him more than ever before. Panicking at her sudden feelings she backed away from him and went to find Hera. Maybe she could talk to her about it.

She saw Hera just as she was departing and sighed, putting on her calm exterior to talk to Kanan instead.

“I'm surprised she got on the ship.” She watched the Ghost disappear into the cloud cover.

“I told her I had a plan.” Kanan insisted.

“Really? And she left anyway?” Sabine knew well by now that sarcasm was one of her coping methods, but she also didn’t want Kanan thinking she was too worried over Ezra.

“Very funny.” He quipped. “Come on.” He entered the Phantom 2 and retrieved something.

“Ezra's wrist com?” Sabine questioned, realizing what it was.

“I need you to put a tracker on it without him knowing.” Kanan requested, passing it to her.

Now she really was worried. Why would Kanan need a tracker on Ezra? She turned it over in her hands.

“Right away.” She agreed and set off to work.

Implanting the tracker and programming it to the Phantom 2’s computers was easy for her and gave her some clarity of thought. Working with her hands had always calmed her down in the past. Kanan obviously had a plan and she was grateful. Once she had finished she returned it to its place in their ship.

She sunk into one of the Phantom 2’s seats and sighed. Today was not a good day.

“Hey.” Kanan’s voice grabbed her attention and she watched him move up the ramp towards her.

“I did what you asked.” She confirmed. “I hope your plan works out, whatever it is.”

He sat down across from her. “I think Maul is influencing Ezra and we’re going to need to know where the kid goes.”

Sabine had thought she was prepared to hear the plan, but now she wasn’t so sure.

“Influenced? You mean controlled?” her core tightened defensively in reflex to the news.

“I’m not sure yet.” Kanan admitted “But I’ll know soon. Hopefully.”

She bowed her head, feeling a wave of depression hit her.

“Are you alright? You seem like you’re troubled.” Kanan observed.

“You know, for being blind you sure notice a lot about people.” She smirked.

He chuckled “Yeah well, the Force tells me a lot more now that I’ve needed to rely on it.”

She grew nervous that maybe Kanan could know her thoughts and feelings towards Ezra. “Kanan?” she watched his face tilt towards her, almost as though he could see her through closed eyes.

“What is it Sabine?” He waited for her reply.

“Kanan. You know what’s going on with him better than I ever will. That connection you share to the Force, to each other, whatever it is…” she shook her head “I just…I feel like I’m the one that’s blind. That I can’t see what’s going on and it scares me Kanan.” She realized that she had spoken the truth with no filter and no dodging. She had admitted to herself and now Kanan what was clutching at her heart.

“Hmm.” He held out a hand and she took it. “Sabine, believe it or not I know what it’s like to be in the dark.”

She wanted to say something snarky, but held her tongue as he continued.

“I know how you must feel and I’m glad you’re being honest with me. I wasn’t honest with myself for a long time and it didn’t do any good to anyone.” He squeezed her hand. “I need you to trust me and be strong for Ezra. Can you do that for me?”

She squeezed back “Yes. I can.”

He stood and pulled her to her feet as well, drawing her into a hug. “This is going to be difficult, and to be honest I’m not quite sure what to do, but I promise I’ll do all I can to help him.”

She held on tighter for a moment before letting go “Thank you Kanan.” She smiled, valuing the father figure he’d become to her. She smirked at the thought of being a Mandalorian raised by a Jedi.

She tried to fulfil other duties that day, but always found herself back at the medical bay, looking in on her still sleeping crewmate. She was glad he was finally getting some needed rest, but she was worried about him not waking up at all. She scolded herself for having that irrational fear and went back to her room. He’d be fine.

Laying down in her bunk at the base, she stared at the ceiling wondering what Kanan’s plan was exactly, and hoping that he actually had one like he’d implied.

She thought about what she’d felt earlier with Ezra. Touching his face had come naturally to her and she wasn’t a very touchy person normally. She’d felt compassion towards him and worry for him. She also struggled with the fact that for a while now she’d been noticing how much she missed him when they were separate and how much she got excited when they were reunited. She fought the urge to go back to his bedside and sleep next to him. She knew she needed to rest and prepare for when he would be awake.

Closing her eyes she heard her roommate shift in her sleep. The base was small and they’d needed to save space by bunking as many as they could in rooms together. She didn’t mind it most nights, but now she missed her privacy on the Ghost. She shoved her face in her pillow hoping to smother tears that pricked threateningly at her eyes. As if being in the rebellion was stressful enough, now she had to deal with the fact that she started to admit to herself that she maybe sort of liked Ezra more than she ever thought she would. Throw on top of that the fact that said boy was going insane and maybe being controlled by a darksider nuisance to the galaxy, one she held a personal grudge against.

She turned over and sighed, forcing herself to sleep.

Sabine woke the next morning and quickly prepared for the day, rushing down to the medical unit to see how Ezra was doing. She was surprised and scared to see he was gone. “Hey.” She addressed the medical droid “Where’s Ezra?”

The glowing visual receptors turned on her “I discharged the patient into the care of Kanan Jarrus earlier this morning.”

She practically flew through the base looking for them. The storm from yesterday had passed, but the fog remained heavy in the morning sun. “Great.” She muttered realizing that the speeder bike they used was gone and headed back to the Phantom 2, making sure the tracker on Ezra was working.

She programmed her wrist com into the feed so she’d be able to track him on foot if needed.

“Sabine.” Kanan’s voice crackled over the com.

“Yeah Kanan.” She acknowledged.

“I need you to prep the Phantom 2 for flight. We’re going after Ezra.” He told her.

Her heart froze. “Wait, what do you mean going after him?” Her feelings of dread started to sink in again.

“Maul showed up and now he’s gone with him.” Kanan clarified.

Her chest felt as if someone had tried to rip out her heart and crush her lungs. “HE WHAT?!” Ezra had just left willingly with Maul? Maul had been on their base for real? How?

She engaged the Phantom 2’s systems and started tracking the signal. Sure enough, it was moving away from their location.

Double checking all the systems she hopped up on the outside of the ship taking extra care with readying it. She couldn’t afford a malfunction now.

When Kanan arrived they took off together following the Sith and Ezra.

Kanan related to her what had happened and she gripped the controls “I can’t believe Maul was actually at the base!” she growled “How much of Ezra’s memories does he have access to?” She worried that other sensitive information could come to light through the treacherous Zabraki male.

What if he did turn around and sell them to the empire?

“I don’t know.” Kanan muttered “All I know is Ezra chose to do this.”

That’s what worried her.

They dropped out of hyperspace to see a red planet looming before them.

“Why is Ezra so willing to trust Maul again and again?” she asked Kanan, wondering if there was something deeper holding on to Ezra. He couldn’t be that stupid. Sure he’d trusted Hondo too many times, but he’d learned…right? And besides, Hondo was nothing like Maul.

“I don't think he is.” Kanan said. “But I do know he's taking a big risk for all of us.”

There it was again. A familiar sinking feeling that Ezra was doing something dangerous and it was for her and the others.

She’d be the first to admit he tended to get a little overprotective of her, but to go off willingly with Maul…

She gritted her teeth together. If she found Ezra alive she’d either hit him or kiss him.

Landing on planet, she immediately recognized Maul’s ship, the Mandalorian design and color scheme setting her into her fight mode right away.

They followed the signal from Ezra into the cave before them. It was dark and the air felt cold. Smells of decay reached her nostrils and she pushed aside feelings of dread. Rushing forward she could hear them and knew they were close. She halted in her steps as everything went dark. “Kanan I can’t see.” She regretted not having her helmet’s night vision. She’d been so distracted she’d left it behind.

 Creeping slow and being led by Kanan, Sabine saw a sudden glow ignite in the darkness. “Kanan there’s something ahead.” She warned quietly as screeching noises and voices filled her ears.

“I know, I can sense something dark.” He muttered.

Coming into view of them she saw something she almost couldn’t believe. Floating green entities with eerily glowing eyes. “Pay our due!” they chanted.

“Kanan, Sabine! Stay back!” Ezra called noticing their arrival.

No way was she letting Maul sacrifice Ezra to these things. Stepping forward she took her shots at the creatures, but something wasn’t right.

Her blasts weren’t connecting and the things didn’t seem effected at all. She stepped away as one neared her and an overwhelming sense of panic filled her as it reached out towards her and there was nothing she could do to stop it.

The next thing she knew she could see Ezra, but she couldn’t move. Her body moved without her consent and knocked him aside effortlessly. “NO! EZRA!” she screamed in her mind.

“You belong to me now child.” A sinister voice echoed in her thoughts. “We will rebuild the Nightsisters with your body as our vessel. I’m sure that boy would make an excellent slave for us.”

She couldn’t stop her own body from moving and panicked when her blasters were pulled from their holsters.

“NO!! DON’T YOU DARE!!!” she screamed at the spirit.

A maniacal laugh echoed in her head and she found herself in darkness. Staring at the green glowing spirit face to face. “Don’t worry.” The spirit cackled “Your body will be well taken care of. As soon as we capture the boy you can have him as your servant and help us rebuild our clan.”

An image of Ezra kneeling before her holding a platter of food popped up, but his subservience didn’t end there. Visions of herself straddling his lap and rocking against him flooded her senses. She tried to shut her eyes but it was still there. His form was bare to her view and she wore a red dress made of some sort of reptilian leather. It hid most of their lower regions but she wasn’t so naïve as to not know what was going on between them. A vision of a little child with blue-black hair followed, and she realized how the Nightsisters wanted her to rebuild their clan.

“No thank you.” She rushed at the spirit and tried to punch it, but went right through it.

It laughed at her. “I see. I’ll have to just keep you locked away here. If you were willing to help us I could show you what’s happening right now.”

Sabine debated in her head of what to say. She wanted to know what was going on. She wanted to see through her own eyes, but at the same time…

“Why would I ever help you?” she spat.

The spirit leered at her. “You are indeed strong willed, but I will not have trouble controlling you. Why not be a willing supporter, and I can grant you powers you never imagined?”

A flash of vision came to her view, in it a familiar picture was before her. She’d seen the gigantic stained glass portrait of the former Duchess on Mandalore. Why was there a picture of it here? She saw her hand reach out and grasp a hilt of a weapon before the vision went dark again and the spirit was back. “I know where you came from. I know what you can do with these powers.”

Sabine shook her head “I’m not going to be swayed by you. You think I’m that desperate for power?”

The spirit cackled “It’s in your blood isn’t it?” Flashes of her past and of events that had happened on Mandalore flooded through her mind. “Your family rose to power.” Flashes of the Duchess and of Death Watch claiming her throne were before her eyes. Other events followed and she spotted her mother in the number of the Death Watch warriors. Sabine tried to scream out to her for help, but realized these were all figments of the spirit’s invention.

“STOP IT!” she cried desperately “You will not do this to me!” Her voice lowered to a deadly growl.

The spirit merely laughed “I will shut you away then, you will not be needed.” Before Sabine could answer, the spirit froze and gasped. Horrific screams poured from its mouth and suddenly Sabine could feel her body again, she could feel herself screaming and she could see Ezra standing before her, his hands raised as he used the Force to push her backwards. Sabine could feel the invisible pressure dragging her back as her arms flailed and her nails dug into the earth.

“GET OUT!!!” she screamed at the spirit.

It leapt from her, fleeing back into the darkness. Sabine fell to the ground and coughed as her lungs started to work under her own control again.

Ezra moved forward kneeling down beside her.

“Ezra? Whatever you got out of Maul, I hope it was worth it.” She felt as though she’d been through a fight for her life, and probably had. Her body was heavy and her voice weak.

“Do not go back in there.” He ordered her firmly “They'll possess you again.” She could tell he was angry. She glanced at his hand and was surprised. He was holding something very familiar to her. He stood and ran back into the cave before she could ask about it.

“Wha…What about you? Won't they possess you, too?!” she called after his retreating form.

“I'm counting on it!” he yelled back.

Her eyebrows rose and her heart pounded. There he was again, running off into danger to protect her. “Well.” She stood dusting herself off and staring into the darkness. “Two can play at that game.” She waited only a moment before charging back in. 

As she neared where they had been, horrible screams and screeches sounded before a shockwave hit her.

She slowed her pace and approached warily. She didn’t see any of the green glowing beings anymore. Their lights had faded leaving only dim sunlight pouring in from holes in the ceiling. The Nightsisters’ alter had been cracked in two and they were gone. She moved forward, and there she saw Kanan and Ezra kneeling next to him. She was relieved to see them both alive.

“This is the last time we're working with Maul.” Kanan grumbled.

“I sure hope so.” She said.

Ezra looked up at her surprised “Sabine, I told you to stay outside.”

She inwardly laughed at him “Hey, I've never listened to you before. Why start now?” She smirked at his pout. He should know by now…

“Well, was it worth it? Did you find out what you wanted to know?” Kanan asked.

“Yes. The answer to my question of how to destroy the Sith, is Obi-Wan Kenobi.” Ezra stated.

Sabine had heard that name before…but he was dead… wasn’t he?

“You think he's still alive?” Kanan asked as if mirroring her wondering.

“He must be.” Ezra insisted “But, Kanan, Maul's also looking for him.”

Great…

“So he knows where he is now?” Kanan inquired.

 “The holocron didn't tell us that. It just told us a planet with two suns.” Ezra clarified.

“Well, that hardly narrows it down.” Sabine huffed. This was ridiculous. Did Ezra know how many systems had binary suns? And how many planets in said systems housed life?

“Well, we're gonna have to figure it out, because if we don't find Master Kenobi before Maul…” Kanan paused.

“There won't be any way to stop the Sith.” Ezra finished his sentence for him looking grim.

Sabine briefly made eye contact with Ezra as he passed her, at least he was safe now. They were all safe now. She turned her head looking away from him and something caught her eye. Moving to investigate she squinted, trying to make out what it really was.

She was shocked to find that it was the darksaber hilt. She reached down but hesitated before picking it up. What was it doing here? Had her vision of picking it up before been real? Her features knit in concern and she wondered if she should just leave it. She knew its history and its importance to her own family.

Do I take it?

She gripped it tighter and turned to follow Kanan and Ezra. No need to worry them with her absence.

She made a mental note to ask Ezra what exactly had happened in the cave.

Later maybe…she thought.

Right now she had a lot to think about on her own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I took inspiration from The Courtship of Princess Leia book by Dave Wolverton. In it they talk about the Dathomir witches and how they have a rule of whatever male they capture becomes their slave and they use them to procreate. I'm glad Dathomir and the Nightsisters stayed canon even though the rest of the EU isn't considered as such.


	6. Little one.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Child Sabine and her mum.

“Mama, mama!” A little Sabine ran into her mother’s arms, smooshing her cheek against familiar armor.

“Did you miss me?” Her mother asked with a fond smile.

“Yes mama.” She giggled as her mother swooped her up, carrying her with her. “You were gone forever.” She whined hugging tight around her mom’s neck.

“Well this time you’re coming with me.” Her mother rubbed her fingers through the little girl’s hair.

“And uncle and aunty too?” she questioned, referring to those in whose care she’d been left while her mother was away.

“Yes, they’ll come too.” her mother placed her down once she had reached the little girl’s room. “You need to pack your stuff Sabine.” Her mother pulled out her traveling bag and opened it. Sabine had gotten used to moving around in the past year with her caretakers.

“Ok.” She started putting her belongings in the bag, but as most children do, she got distracted. Plopping her mother’s helmet on her head she asked “When can I have one too mommy?”

Her mother chuckled at the sight of the much too large helmet on her little girl. “One day I’ll give you one.” She turned back to packing.

“This one mama?” She asked sweetly, playing with the rangefinder.

“We’ll see.” Her mother answered with a smirk. “It does look good on you.”

Sabine pulled it off and held it in her lap. “Can I paint it mama?”

“Paint it?” her mother questioned, going back to her task.

“Uncle says I’m really good at paints. Want to see?” before her mother could answer, she’d placed the helmet aside and scampered out of the room.

Running back in, Sabine held her colorful treasures close to her chest. “LOOK!” she spread them out one by one. Bright abstract swooshes and splatters formed a decorative quilt across the bed. “I painted these by myself!”

Her mother picked one up, inspecting it closer “You certainly have a gift with color my little one.”

With a big grin across her face, Sabine picked up one work with blues and reds mixing into purples that faded into black at the edges. Splashes of yellow and dots of white littered the colorful expanse. “I painted space for you mama!” She shoved it into her mom’s hands. “Uncle said there are pretty clouds in space that sparkle.”

Her mother smiled “Yes Sabine. He’s right.”

Sabine pointed out to other works “One day I’ll see space clouds like those.”

“I’m sure you will.” Her mother started gathering up the paintings, but Sabine took over. “Hurry now, we must leave soon. We’re going to a new home.”

“Will you leave again mama?” She stacked her art carefully as though each had an ordered place.

“Yes Sabine, I have to go back.” Seeing her daughter’s pout, she shook her head “Don’t be sad about it little one. I’m only doing this to protect you.”

Sabine tried to stick her paintings in her bag. “Sabine.” Her mother cautioned “They’ll be wrinkled like that.”

She helped her arrange them carefully and patted her head “Ready?” Sabine nodded and her mother took the bag, passing her helmet to the little girl. “Hold on to that for me?”

Sabine hugged it tightly and followed her mother out of their home to a waiting ship.

“Will we come back here?” She asked, being strapped into her seat.

“I don’t know.” Her mother activated the controls.

 “I thought uncle and aunty were coming with us.” She noted, looking around.

“They’ll meet us there tomorrow.” Her mother explained.

Sabine stuck the helmet on her head once more and started humming, playing with her voice in the confined space.

Her mother glanced at her and worried. So much was happening to the galaxy. There was an empire now and one she wasn’t too thrilled to see trying to occupy Mandalore. At least she had driven them away for the moment, but she knew they’d return. Listening to her child’s singing she thought of her own childhood and the war that had happened. It was a hard way to grow up, but she was stronger because of it.

Sabine was so full of wonder, so full of hope. She herself had that strong hope, but the wonder had faded into a bitterness that haunted her. Results of the constant fights and allies she’d chosen. Now, another war was coming, but it wouldn’t start right away. She knew the resources the Republic, now Empire, had at its disposal. There was no way to win in an all-out fight. She would need to protect her daughter in any way she could.

Sabine’s giggles and hums filled the quiet cabin and her feet swung off the end of the seat in time to her song.

Sabine would become a great warrior, she promised herself. She would raise her daughter like she herself had been raised.

To fight.


	7. Colorful Truce

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sabine and Ezra get some art done while growing closer. Set in season three.

 

 

Sabine picked up another color stick and traced around the shape she was forming.

She sat in her room, her armor removed for the day and comfortably dressed in a tank top and compression shorts. She liked the way the colored pigment looked against her skin as she marked out a series of intricate lines and shapes on her arm. She loved to experiment with different designs, often using her own body as her canvas. As the color sticks were washable, she’d be able to change her drawings constantly. There was no way she’d be happy with something permanent. She knew quite well she was far too fickle to want an unchangeable illustration.

She smiled as the memory of her younger self doing the same thing came to mind, and the one time Ezra had joined her. She had been at the table in the common area of the Ghost, her color sticks spread out before her and her arm outstretched. She was drawing close to her elbow when Ezra had walked by.

 “Hey.” He paused and looked at what she was doing. “Wow.” He moved closer and sat down across from her on one of the stools. “That looks really cool! You should draw on me too.”

She glanced up at him. He seemed excited as he admired the work she’d done on herself. He didn’t seem like he was flirting. She’d tried her best not to encourage him and lately he’d been backing off, so hopefully, she thought to herself, his crush was done with.

She didn’t mind getting attention from an admirer, but having said admirer be around her and work with her every day, plus the fact that he was younger than her, and he could be kinda annoying sometimes didn’t thrill her.

She nodded once “Ok, take off your jacket.”

“Sweet!” He smiled pulling it off in haste and rolling up the short sleeve of the dark orange shirt underneath.

She moved a hand over her color sticks debating which to use first. She glimpsed again at the boy before her. The too-big dark orange shirt seemed awfully worn, and his shaggy blue-black hair was falling in his brilliant eyes as he watched her hand hovering over the colors.

She picked up the yellow and added a small stripe to his wrist. “Hmm. This color looks good on you.” She noted, continuing the lines diagonally up his arm.

They sat in comfortable silence while she drew. He seemingly didn’t want to disturb her work with his questions or comments. When she did speak occasionally, it was to explain her thoughts on the design or ask what color he would like best to fill an area.

“Well you’re the artist.” He’d chuckle.

She shook her head “I’ve seen your drawings too Ezra. You’re not half bad.”

He grinned. “Thanks. Maybe we could collaborate sometime.”

She smiled and grabbed another color. “Maybe you could do my other arm.” She suggested.

“R-really?” he stammered “I mean…uh, I don’t know if I can do anything as cool as this.” He looked his arm up and down, twisting it slightly to see the rest.  

“Well, I can wash it off if I think it’s lame.” She teased, moving back to admire her designs. She’d done a mix of lines and dots that faded into spirals and a starbird on his upper arm surrounded by flames. “Here.” She held out her blank arm on the table and waited.

He hesitated before picking up a purple color stick. Drawing on herself had always been calming, but being drawn on was a new experience. She was excited and smiled as a lothcat took shape on her forearm, the tail wrapping around to the underside of her hand.

She watched his face contort in concentration as he switched colors and started drawing again. A small smile tugged at her lips and she studied him.

 He really was a street kid. She looked him over again, noting the worn seams of his shirt and markings on his tan skin. Some seemed to be faint scars from what looked like cat scratches. His hair was disheveled and long, his eyebrows knit in focus on his task, his eyes… His eyes were by far the most attractive feature he had. They were like the sky at dusk on Lothal, luminous and blue. She felt a warmth flood her chest and she closed her eyes focusing on the feeling of the color stick tracing against her skin. One of his hands was warm pressed under her arm as he drew. She soon became aware that the color stick had stopped moving. He must be choosing another color, she reasoned, and waited for him to continue. When he didn’t she opened her eyes to find him staring at her.

His gaze darted away. “Uh, sorry! I uh… are you ok?” He was turning red and she smirked.

“Yes, Ezra. I just want to be surprised.” She closed her eyes again relaxing and trying to imagine what the strokes of color on her skin would look like. She could feel him fidget slightly and continue.

“Ok. Done.” He finally announced, pulling away from her.

She opened her eyes and looked down at her arm. “Woah.” She smiled. “I like it.” It was colorful swirls that morphed into different kinds of creatures he’d encountered. The little lothcat near her wrist being the clearest representation of an animal.

“Yeah?” He set down the color stick in his hand and shrugged. “It’s not my best, but I guess it looks kinda cool.”

She looked at him again making eye contact “Want me to do your other arm?”

His face lit up “Yeah!” He eagerly turned to give her access and closed his eyes. “This time I want to be surprised.”

She laughed. “Alright then. No peeking.” She set to work with a smile on her lips and had to admit that he actually was fun to be with sometimes.

She was brought back into the present, looking down at her current combination of colors on her arm. It still needed something… but what?

She squinted and pursed her lips as she felt her stomach growl. How long had it been since she’d eaten? Standing up she stretched her legs and wandered out to the galley. Entering she found Ezra at the table eating.

 “Oh hey Sabine.” He said shoving another bite in his mouth “There’s food left over if you want. We weren’t sure if you were hungry so we saved some.” She retrieved her portion and sat across from him. “Nice designs.” He smiled and motioned with his fork at her arm.

 She picked up some food on her own utensil “Thanks.” She glanced down at it. She’d started at her elbow and gone up. The drawings splayed over her shoulder and worked their way across half of her collar bone and (unknown to him) down to her hip. After recalling her fond memory of their younger selves she wondered if he’d want to repeat the experience. “I could always use another designer or another canvas though.”

He chuckled “Does that mean you’re going to draw on me again? Just not the face this time ok?”

She laughed at his reference to a prank she and Zeb had played on him one night while he slept.

“Not this time.” She assured. They finished their meal and she led him back to her room.

“I thought we were going to use the dejarik table again.” He paused at the doorway.

“Nah.” She shrugged “I’d have to transfer all my stuff.” She also had a table in her room they could use, but it was occupied with her paints and jetpack at the moment.

She flopped down in her previous spot on the floor and motioned for him to join her. He sat cross-legged in front of her and she turned sideways sticking out her bare arm. “Here. I’ll let you go first.”

He agreed and started drawing. After a while her arm was getting uncomfortable being held out for him, even with his hand supporting her elbow. “Here.” she rolled her shoulder in discomfort and rested her hand on his knee leaving her arm outstretched for him to work on. He was to the top her shoulder at this point and reached up to move the tank top out of the way, pushing it towards her neck.

“Gotta match the other side.” He explained as he continued drawing over her shoulder and collar bone. She twisted her body to slightly face him more. She watched his eyes flicker from his own drawing to the other side she’d completed on herself. She realized that he was copying the range that she had accomplished earlier and felt his fingers softly brush the top of her chest. “How far did you go down?” he asked jokingly as he reached the neckline of her top.

It wasn’t extremely low cut, but she wondered if he comprehended what he was drawing on. She squirmed trying to ignore the sudden feelings welling up in her stomach. “I wanted more canvas this time.” She reasoned.

“Isn’t that what I’m here for?” he asked pulling his hand away from her skin. “There. Your turn.” He stripped off his jacket revealing a light beige shirt that was fitted to his form. This wasn’t like last time at all… He wasn’t a little lothrat anymore. She almost panicked as he rolled up the short sleeve and scooted to be in front of her. Since when did he have this much muscle? Sure she’d seen him shirtless before, but she’d never felt the sturdy cords under her fingers till now.

“Hold still.” She reprimanded as he fidgeted with his jacket. He had one arm held out for her and with the other hand he was picking fuzz off his coat.

“Sorry.” He stopped his motion and sighed “Can I put my arm down now?” She’d finished up to his elbow and he flexed his hand, clearly uncomfortable.

“Yeah go ahead.” She distractedly looked for another color. He relaxed with his arm balanced in his lap. She returned to her work and groaned “No, not like that, I can’t get the right angle I need your palm up.”

He awkwardly tried to reposition “What do you mean?”

She rolled her eyes and grabbed his hand facing it up and pulling it across her own leg so it rested near her left hip. “There.” She continued drawing up the inside of his bicep feeling his fingers curl into a loose fist and brush lightly against her side. Her heart decided that this was the perfect moment to try and escape her ribcage and she had to take a deep breath to concentrate. Did he do that on purpose?

She was observant enough to know he kept looking at her face while she drew. She didn’t dare look up at him, knowing all too well what those bright eyes could do to her resolve.

Karabast…how did she get into this situation? He was so close and his arm could easily curl around her waist and pull her into his lap. She wiped the image from her mind as she selected another color. She had to lean against his outstretched arm to reach it and it practically felt like he was holding her. She continued drawing, leaning a little away from him just in case her mind got any ideas about kissing him.

She’d admitted to herself a while ago that she did like him more now that he was maturing…a lot more. She’d always cared for him, however, these feelings were different.

But that still didn’t mean she needed to do anything about it. Just because you have a feeling, doesn’t mean it should be acted upon, besides…how did she know he even still liked her? Hadn’t he out grown his crush from years ago? As if to answer her question she heard him swallow. Oh no…

She knew perfectly well what that meant. With her proximity to him it should have been expected. When one starts to be turned on, excess saliva will form as a preparation to kissing.

What would be so wrong with kissing though? She let her eyes drift up for half a second to his lips when she knew he wasn’t looking at her. Yeah, she could…but the aftermath would be the worst.

If she did it, he’d certainly expect more of her. And if she did give in to kissing him, she knew she would eventually desire a deeper physicality.

Mentally, emotionally, and even scientifically… Male saliva carries testosterone that triggers a female’s sex drive to increase when introduced to their body chemistry. Making out with him would just turn her on more than she already was.

She clenched her teeth together. No way was she going to get “triggered” any higher today. She was already trying to ignore the tingling feeling at the apex of her legs.

She also didn’t think that sex was all he wanted. She knew Ezra, he would want a steady relationship and that was something she couldn’t promise. She couldn’t deal with the fact that their dynamic would change. She’d been so careful in limiting their close interaction even though times like this did sporadically happen. Sometimes he would brush against her or she would linger a little too long in his personal space, but she’d been very strict with herself about giving in to desires. Even now she bit her lip to focus on something other than the increased rate of her heart beat and the seeming pressure on her lungs.

She finished her work and released him “There, done!”

He moved away as well and looked it over. “Nice. Wanna do the other one?” he held out his blank arm and she inwardly sighed. He was undoing her carefully placed guards unknowingly. The smile, the eyes, and the trust he had in her not to write I’m a loser all over his arms. She grinned at that last thought.

“Yeah.” She answered.

He turned to face the other way stretching out his legs in front of him. “Ah.” He groaned “Sitting too long.” He explained.

She sat up straighter noticing her joints were indeed getting stiff. Uncrossing her legs she threw one out behind him and one over his legs. “Hmm much better.” She remarked, loving the feeling of her muscles unclenching

He rested his arm across her thigh as she started drawing again. “Wait a second.” He said causing her to pause and look up at him. He grabbed a color stick and made to draw on his own arm.

“What are you doing?” she asked confused.

“I’m bored with just sitting, let’s both draw.” He grinned.

She rolled her eyes “If you’re bored then leave. I’m not forcing you to stay.”

He shook his head “No, it’s not done yet, we gotta finish.”

She laughed “You’re just going to get in my way you know that right?”

He raised his eyebrows in mock surprise “Really?” He looked around “Fine then.” His hand came down and started drawing on her shin.

“Hey!” she tried to move her leg away.

“What?” he chuckled “You let me draw on your arms, how is this different?”

She sighed “Ugh, fine! But it better not look like trash.”

“I thought you liked my drawings.” He grinned swirling the color down the side of her leg.

She continued drawing on his shoulder and took in the position they were in. He was sitting facing sideways between her legs, one hand resting on her thigh, the other drawing slow circles on her calf

If he wanted to he could just turn his body towards her and…

In her head she could easily see his arm remove itself from her thigh and snake around her waist. His hips would turn as he laid her down on the floor and settled himself on top of her, staring into her eyes until he drew close enough to kiss her. He would kiss her softly at first, and then tempt her mouth to open and deepen the kiss. Slowly his kisses would drift down her neck and over the colored markings he’d placed on her skin. His lips would find the edge of the tank top and his hand would pull it lower, just enough to dust his fingernails over a more sensitive area while his lips continued back up to her mouth. At this point she’d roll her hips and watch his reaction. He might push against her at this point and she’d know how excited he was. His hand would move from the top of her shirt to the bottom and push it up over her ribs. He’d laugh at the fact that she had drawn down one side to her hip. He’d kiss her ribs, her stomach, and move lower, past her belly button, down further until…

“Sabine?” His voice snapped her out of her daydream and she berated herself for thinking of him that way.

“Yeah Ezra?” she tried to control the blush rising in her cheeks.

“You alright?” he asked, a look of concern on his features. “You stopped drawing and were just staring.”

She nodded “Oh, yeah…uh I must’ve spaced out for a minute. I’m a little tired.” She lied.

“Oh.” He sounded disappointed. “I can leave if you want to sleep.”

“I’m not that tired.” She chuckled retracing the outline she’d stopped at. She became extremely aware that he was looking at her again. His drawings on her leg had been abandoned and she debated with herself on whether or not to look at him.

Seemingly without her permission her eyes shifted to meet his. He held her gaze and she felt her heart quiver in her chest. His thumb on her thigh moved slightly and she blinked as a jolt of electricity shot through her. His eyes drifted down to her lips before looking away.

They’d just shared a moment and they both knew it…

It wasn’t the first time, and she hoped it wouldn’t be the last, but she was relieved he hadn’t tried anything else.

Going back to drawing now would just be a little awkward for her so…

“Hey Ezra.” He turned back to her and she swiped the color stick across his cheek.

He looked stunned for a moment and she grinned mischievously.

His own smile lit up his face “That’s it!” he lunged at her with his own color and started an impromptu wrestling match. Giggling and yelling playfully at each other while grappling for control had them out of breath when they were finally interrupted.

“I thought I heard something back here.” Hera stood at the open door watching them struggle.

“She drew on my face!” Ezra complained trying to lunge for her again when she broke away. She laughed and dodged, flying towards Hera and hiding behind her.

“Hey now you two.” Hera cautioned being caught in the middle of them. They continued to dodge around her until she flattened herself against the corridor to get out of the way.

Sabine yelped as Ezra gave chase and she ran for the cargo bay. There was much more room in there to run away.

She made it only to have him vault over her head and land in front of her. Curse his Jedi abilities.

“Not fair.” She held out her color stick like a blade before her, hoping to ward him off. He advanced, but instead of backing away she attacked.

By now they both had multiple marks across their faces. She pinned him down and started drawing a mustache on him. “Hold still Ezra!” she laughed as he tried to avoid her markings.

“AAHH NO!!” He started to squirm knocking her off balance and rolled over, pinning her down instead. “Pay back Sabine!!”

He laughed maniacally as he started to mark in a unibrow on her.

“AHH STOP!!!” she cried “HELP!!!” she struggled against him when suddenly his weight was gone.

She looked up to find Zeb standing over her, holding Ezra against the wall. “Here Sabine.” He chuckled “Got him all ready for you.”

She grinned and finished drawing the mustache while Ezra fruitlessly struggled. “AH NOT FAIR!” he griped.

“What else should I do?” she questioned playfully as Ezra glared at her.

“Write something on his forehead.” Chuckled Zeb. “Lothrat or bucket brain.” She grinned and moved forward.

Before she could write anything, the color stick flew from her hand and landed at the far end of the cargo bay. She was confused for a second, but quickly realized that Ezra had used the Force. “Hey!” Zeb growled as he was pushed back by Ezra’s abilities.

Sabine turned and fled. She was now unarmed and had a Jedi chasing her. She was grateful to Zeb for delaying Ezra enough to let her make it to her room. She closed and locked the door behind her breathing hard and laughing as she heard his body thud against the barrier between them.

“Oh Sabiiine!” she heard him taunt from outside her chamber. “Come out come out and play!”

She laughed again. “No thanks!”

He knocked at the door “Giving up already Sabine?” She looked around her room wondering how she could win this. “I still have your color sticks. You should come and get them!”

She could just throw paint at him, grab the sticks and lock the door again. But that would mean greater retaliation in the future and a mess to clean. She needed to diffuse the situation rather than igniting it. “Can we call it even? A truce?” she yelled through the door.

“Truce?” he laughed “Oh I don’t think so Beanie.”

“What did you just call me?” maybe paint was a good idea.

“What do I get in trade for a truce?” he asked drumming on her door with the color sticks. “A kiss?”

She rolled her eyes. “Alright, I’ll give you a kiss.”

Silence…

He obviously hadn’t expected her to agree. She smiled wickedly and wished she could see his face at that moment.

“What?” his voice was more shocked than questioning.

“I said I’d give you a kiss. Do we have a deal?” she listened to another pause before his answer.

“Yeah. I guess.” He was obviously at a loss for words.

She opened the door and held out her hand. He passed her the art tools and smiled expectantly.

She smiled back before closing the door and locking it.

“Hey!” he called out from the other side. “What about our deal?!!”

She giggled “I never said it would be right now!”

“Oh come on!” he whined. “Fine, but I won’t forget!”

She heard another voice and a scuffle in the hallway. He and Zeb were roughhousing again and soon were away from her room.

She turned and noticed his jacket still on her floor. Picking it up, she folded it and placed it aside. He’d come looking for it eventually.

She chuckled to herself and gathered up her color sticks off the ground. She put them away and thought of ways to get out of their arrangement.

Did she even want out? From their moment earlier and all the times they’d come close to something, she wondered if maybe this could be a way to start something new between them.

After washing her face off in the fresher, she passed Ezra in the hallway. “I won’t forget.” He winked. She rolled her eyes at him and snorted, continuing to her room. It was hard to take him seriously with green swipes and a mustache drawn on his face.

As she prepared for bed she wondered, did she even want something new with him?

In her head it all played out perfectly, but real life rarely followed what she imagined.

She had taken advice from Hera on relationships and knew that the more involved with him she was, the harder it would be if something happened to him. She knew Hera had told her that out of personal experience and she wasn’t quite prepared for more heartache.

Then again…

Hera had also told her that she didn’t regret becoming close with Kanan. She had found someone to rely on and to love. She’d told Sabine in no uncertain terms just how much Kanan meant to her as a partner and lover.

Sabine took a breath and pinched the bridge of her nose. Why was this so difficult?

She’d told Hera that maybe she had started to value Ezra more than before and had struggled to find words to describe her feelings. “Hera, it’s like I want to kiss him one minute and push him out the airlock the next.” She’d said.

Hera had smiled knowingly and nodded “Oh believe me, I know the feeling.” She’d then proceeded to tell Sabine more about how she’d come to terms with her love for Kanan and also warned her about the difficulties that could arise.

She’d admitted that they’d had a fight before the other crew had joined that almost tore them apart, but he’d stayed by her side regardless.

Hera cautioned Sabine that an explosive fight between her and Ezra could affect their missions for the rebellion and added “It won’t always be perfect in love, but it is worth it.”

Sabine climbed into her bunk and curled up, wondering if she really wanted love right now. She had so much uncertainty in her own life and the rebellion was unpredictable. She wasn’t only concerned about her feelings, but his as well. If she did give in to her growing attachment to Ezra and something happened to her…

She hugged her pillow imagining his sorrow at losing her. It was better not to get too close. Yes he’d miss her now if she was killed, but he’d be tortured even more if she promised him a future by her side that was never fulfilled.

Resolving again in her mind to not show her feelings to him, she was brought back to her predicament.

How to get out of the kiss.  

It took a few moments of deliberation, but she concocted a plan.

Slipping out of her bunk late that night she shuffled through her makeup bag and extracted a tube of lipstick. She smiled in amusement as she applied it and snuck in to his room. He and Zeb were asleep as she crept closer to the bunks.

She silently climbed up to Ezra’s bed and smiled at his sleeping face.

He seemed so care free, the colored markings were gone and his mouth was open slightly. She leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his cheek. She pulled away, admiring the perfect imprint of her lips against his skin, and quickly fled back to her room.

Wiping off the makeup and climbing back into her bunk she grinned to herself. Tomorrow would be entertaining for sure.

She woke early and moved to the galley, joining Zeb and Kanan for breakfast. “Is Ezra up?” she asked Zeb.

“He was still asleep when I left. Why?” He looked her over suspiciously.

She hummed lightly “No reason.”

Zeb’s look clearly stated he didn’t believe her. Hera entered and made her way to the caf machine. “Good morning.” She yawned, pouring herself a cup.

Ezra staggered in shortly after and Hera nearly spit out her drink. Zeb’s mouth opened in shock and Sabine just calmly continued with her breakfast.

“Ezra.” Hera placed her cup down and approached him. “What is on your face?”

She tilted his chin to the side and he looked at her confused “Huh?”

“Maybe you should go look.” Zeb chuckled, glancing at Sabine.

“What is it?” Kanan asked as Ezra retreated.

“Kanan, he has a lipstick print on his cheek.” She told him.

“He has a what?” Kanan sounded surprised.

 Hera sat down across from him, next to Sabine. “Care to elaborate Sabine?”

“Oh well you see…” she sniggered to herself “Ezra said we could have a truce if I gave him a kiss. I agreed, but I never told him when I’d give it to him.”

Zeb laughed out loud “So you did it in his sleep?!” he continued to laugh.

“That is pretty clever.” Kanan remarked “Reminds me of someone I used to know.”

Hera made a face. Clearly he meant her.

“SABINE!!!” Ezra’s voice echoed through the Ghost. He ran back into the galley and they all burst out into laughter.

Sabine shrugged “Hey, I never said when, and now you have proof that it happened.”

He pouted “Yeah, but…aww man.” They laughed again. “Alright then I’ll accept it. I’m never washing this off though.” He grinned proudly.

“Ew!” she gave him a look of disgust. “That’s really gross.”

“Agreed Ezra.” Hera chimed in “You need to wash your face sometime.”

“Not when you have proof of an angel’s kiss.” He pointed at his cheek.

“Oh for force sake.” Kanan mumbled.

Hera bit her lip smiling. “Reminds me of someone I used to know.”

Kanan chuckled and held out a hand on the table top. She took it and squeezed.

Sabine saw for a moment what could be a future for her, but just as quickly shoved it from her mind. The day was spent trying to convince him to get rid of the marking and Zeb eventually wrestling his head under the sink.

“I’ll just have to get another one.” He said while drying off in the common area.

“Good luck.” Zeb cuffed him over the head and exited towards their room.

Ezra flopped down on the bench next to her. “What do you say Sabine?” he asked, a goofy grin plastered on his face.

She cocked an eyebrow at him. “Really?”

He nodded eagerly and turned his cheek to her, leaning forward.

She laughed and placed a hand on his face, gently shoving him away.

“Can’t blame me for trying can you?” He stood “I’ll just have to wait then.”

She snorted “You’ll be waiting a long time buddy.”

“I can live with that.” He grinned “A Jedi is patient after all.”

He walked away towards his room and Sabine shook her head once he’d disappeared. He was certainly something…

Something that just might be worth it.


	8. You don't own me! (The fight part I)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by the song You Don't Own Me by Grace. Takes place at the end of "The Antilles Extraction" season 3 episode 4.

Jumping into hyperspace they made their escape from the Empire. Wedge sighed happily “Whew! I thought we were goners for a minute there.”

Sabine agreed “Yeah, so did I. If you could fly faster though…” she raised her eyebrows at him.

“Ha, oh I see how it is. You’re the one that picked that tub to escape in in the first place.” A smirk bent the corner of his mouth.

“And if I didn’t, we probably would’ve been shot to pieces.” She sassed back, poking his arm.

Their playful argument would’ve continued, but Ezra interrupted. “It’s good to have you back Sabine.”

She nodded “Yeah, I’m glad we made it. Thanks for coming back for us.”

He looked up at her from his seat “I’ll always come back for you Sabine.”

She knew there was more behind his words than he said out loud, but as usual chose to ignore it.

“This is Ezra and Kanan.” She pointed out for the newest rebels in the room “Oh and that’s Chopper.” She added motioning to the squat droid. “We’ll take you back to base and get your assignments there with Commander Sato.”

“Sounds good to me.” Hobbie spoke up.

Traveling back to Atollon and Chopper Base would take a while, even via hyperspace routes. Sabine offered to show the new recruits where they could rest and eat, but they were far too interested in talking with the crew about the rebellion.

“So you were happy to hear my voice huh?” Said Ezra with a roguish smirk. He’d managed to pull her aside from the others.

She rolled her eyes at his playfulness “Yeah, I wasn’t too fond of the idea of dying.”

He laughed once, but turned suddenly serious “I didn’t want to leave you out there. Kanan made us abandon you.” His voice was hushed and he glanced towards the rest of the bridge where the others were talking.

“It’s ok Ezra. You had to leave, you were outnumbered.” She saw a flash of something across his face, but couldn’t decide if it was disappointment or anger. “You came back though, and now we’re safe. That’s all that matters.”

He slowly nodded.

“Hey Sabine.” Wedge approached her “Can I have a word with you?”

“Sure.” She led him from the bridge and they walked together down the corridor.

“I just wanted to say thank you. You took a huge risk to come get us and so did your crew. I won’t forget it.” He said, pausing for a moment. “Even if you didn’t have a plan at first.” He nudged her playfully.

She nudged back harder, causing him to stagger sideways “At least I got us out didn’t I?”

He laughed and continued by her side. “Yeah you did. Got us out of more scrapes than one. I think I’m gonna like the rebellion, if I can be as awesome at planning as you.”

“Oh ho, you just can’t let that go can you?” she chortled “Well mister, ‘ _I’m just going to sit in my cell and wait to be rescued_ ’, I’m not sure how my approach is worse than yours.”

He hummed “I don’t mean to be rude, but I think you mispronounced my last name, it’s Antilles, not ‘ _I’m just going to sit in my cell and wait to be rescued_ ’.”

She laughed “Antilles huh? I was sure it was something else.”

He smiled and stopped walking, making her turn towards him. “You mean like, Wedge ‘ _I can fly anything_ ’.” he said proudly.

“No, no, I don’t think that was it.” She leaned against the bulkhead and crossed her arms. “I’m pretty sure you called yourself Wedge ‘ _help me Sabine you’re my only hope_ ’.”

He laughed again and stepped closer leaning his shoulder against the wall next to her. “Well whatever you want to call me I’m happy I met you Miss Sabine ‘ _I don’t have a plan_ '."

She shook her head “Ah now see, you’re starting to mispronounce my name now.”

“Must be spreading.” He glanced around them casually. “Thing is, Sabine Wren, I owe you my life for helping me out of that place.”

She smiled kindly “I wouldn’t go that far Wedge Antilles, but you’re certainly welcome. You should thank Ezra and Kanan too for getting us all out of that mess.”

He nodded “Yeah, I should.” He shuffled a little. “So, uh, Ezra… is he your boyfriend or something?”

She looked up at him shocked “What? Why would you ask that?”

He shrugged “Just the way he looks at you.” He grimaced “And the way he glared at me when I asked to speak with you.”

She shook her head “He’s just very protective of his friends.” She wondered if Wedge was trying to ascertain her relationship status for a reason, or just making connections among the crew.

“You guys have known each other for a while then?” he shifted off the wall.

“A couple years.” She confirmed. “I became a part of Captain Hera’s crew just before he did. We’ve been working together ever since.”

“Must be nice to have people you can count on and people that care for you.” His face and voice took on a sadness and she glanced around at the crew passing back and forth through the hall way. This wasn’t the place for a gloomy talk. She took his arm, leading him to one of the empty crew quarters.

“Are you alright?” she asked once they were alone.

“Yeah…I just…” he sighed and flopped down on the bunk. “My parents were killed a few years ago and then the girl I loved. I lost everyone.” he closed his eyes, burying his face in his hands.

“Hey it’s alright.” She sat down next to him and placed a soothing hand on his arm. “You’ll definitely find people that support you here. I was left on my own too before Kanan recruited me. Now I have a family again and a purpose to keep fighting.”

He looked at her in gratitude. “Thanks Sabine. You’re a really good person.”

She pursed her lips. “Well I try somedays.”

He let out a breathy laugh and placed a hand on her knee. “Well then, today must be one of those days.” He looked like he was going to say something else, but the door opened.

She looked up to see Ezra standing in the portal. “Hey, new guy, Kanan wants you on the bridge.” His voice was even toned, lacking his usual playful lilt.

 Wedge glanced at Sabine and she nodded encouragingly. “Go on.” Wedge stood and made his way back out to the corridor. Sabine tried to follow, but was blocked by Ezra.

She looked up at him in confusion “What are you doing?”

The door shut behind him. “Did you see what he was trying to do?”

Her eyebrows knit together “What are you talking about?”

“He was trying to…” he growled heatedly “Sabine, he lead you somewhere you could be alone, then his hand was on your leg, he was obviously trying…” She didn’t let him finish his rant.

“Ezra Bridger!” Anger quickly flooded her system. “First of all, I led him here. Second of all, it’s none of your business what he does with me.” Ezra’s face looked as though she’d slapped him.

“But Sabine, what if he’d…” his lips twitched, slightly baring his teeth as they ground together.

“What if he’d what, Ezra? What if he’d tried to kiss me?” She realized where this was going and had to shut it down fast. “You don’t have a say in the matter Ezra.”

He scowled “I don’t have a say?” he huffed “Sabine, we’ve looked out for each other for how long now? And when some hotshot imperial comes in and tries to assault you, I’m supposed to look away?”

If she didn’t have as much restraint as she’d mustered currently, she would’ve punched him. “Ezra! He’s not an imperial, and if a boy wants to kiss me, that is my issue to deal with, not yours. Wedge was not assaulting me and I’ll tell you something else Ezra Bridger...” Her voice was low and lethal at this point but she raised it for emphasis. “You don’t own me! So don’t try and control me!”

She tried to push past him, but he caught her arm “Just listen to me Sabine. I’m only looking out for you.”

She yanked away from him “No! That’s not what this is. Wedge just wanted to talk to me and you blew it way out of proportion. You’re jealous of him and you’re acting ridiculous right now.” She folded her arms over her chest.

“I am not jealous of him!” he insisted angrily. “Why would I be jealous of someone trying to take advantage of you?”

He obviously wasn’t listening to her. “I don’t need this right now.” She moved towards the door again, only to be blocked by him once more.

“Sabine, I don’t trust him. I don’t think you should be alone with him.” His face was set in a glare and she squared up to him.

“Move now or I’ll make you move.” She growled out between clenched teeth.

He stared her down for a second longer before stepping aside. He caught her shoulder as she moved past him. “Sabine I…”

She pulled away fiercely “Don’t touch me Ezra!” She pointed at him threateningly “You touch me again and I’ll break your hand.” He was silent. “I don’t care what you say, Wedge is a friend and you need to be nice to him and believe that he’s going to help the rebellion.”

Ezra looked away “Fine, but only because I trust you, not because of him!”

She continued in her low measured voice. “And if you ever do anything to him, if you so much as talk to him in the wrong tone of voice, you can best believe you’ll pay for it.” She saw his jaw tighten and his fists clench.

He wouldn’t look at her now. Instead he just scowled into the corner of the room. “I just want to protect you Sabine.”

She groaned in exasperation “Ezra, I could beat him into next week if he tried anything. I don’t need you to hover over me and tell me how to live my life.” She shook her head realizing this wasn’t the Ezra she’d known before. Something was different.

He bit his lip in frustration “Look, Sabine, I don’t feel comfortable with him being near you.”

That was it. If he wasn’t going to stop this nonsense then she’d do it herself. “Ezra, I’ve tried to explain to you that I am my own person and I do what I think is best for me. You don’t have a say in my personal life, and if you can’t understand that, then I think you need to stay away from me for a while.”

That got his attention. “What?” his fists uncurled and his jaw went slack.

“You heard me. Until you figure out that I make the rules for who I choose to be friends with, I don’t want you around.” Her glare remained as she stared him down.

He looked at the floor before shaking his head “Sabine…I’m just doing what’s best for you. I’m your friend.” he reached out a hand towards her but she stepped back.

“Well you’re not acting like it. I’m serious about not touching me. You touch me, I break you.” She watched his hand withdraw slowly and his sadness turn again to frustration.

“Fine, I’ll stay away from you. Good luck explaining to Hera why we won’t be going on missions together.” The tone he’d taken made her want to hit him even more.

“I’ll just tell her that you’re acting like a possessive jerk and she’ll understand. You think Hera would take this kind of behavior towards her from anyone?” He didn’t answer. “She wouldn’t Ezra, no one should! I certainly won’t!” She stepped towards the door pressing it open and pausing. “I think it’s best if we keep our distance for a while, so don’t tell me otherwise. Just leave me alone.” She walked down the hallway, not waiting for his response.

Taking a deep breath she let it out slowly. What had he been thinking? Who does he think he is? Their argument had felt like a break up and they weren’t even together.

She resolved to find a way to ask Kanan about what had happened previously to Ezra with the holocrons and Maul.

She had overheard him a while ago, tell Hera that something was wrong with Ezra and that the Sith holocron had been influencing him.

She’d had her worries for him before because of this subject, but she thought that everything was getting better now that the holocrons were destroyed and Maul wasn’t after him any longer.

Apparently not.

Ezra still wasn’t acting like himself and until she knew what was wrong so she could help, or until he fixed it, she didn’t want to be around him.

Re-entering the bridge she joined the two newest members of the rebellion next to Kanan.

“Hey, are you ok?” Wedge whispered.

She nodded, flashing a smile for his benefit and listened to what Kanan was explaining.

By the time they reached Chopper Base, Ezra had backed off. He still sent a few looks in her direction, but kept his distance like she’d said to.

Walking down the ramp onto base he pulled away from the group even more. She felt a little bad about pushing him away, but honestly it was for the best.

Right?

 

To be continued...


	9. Kiss and make up? (The fight part II)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Song: Digital Daggers - Where The Lonely Ones Roam
> 
> Can Ezra and Sabine fix things?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Begins right after the last chapter and ends after "The Last Battle" Season 3 ep 6

She tried to talk to Kanan to ease her worries, but ended up being more troubled than before.

“Sabine, Ezra’s going through a confusing time right now.” Kanan admitted. “I’m trying to center him, trying to focus him in the Force, but he still resists.” Kanan lifted a hand to his beard, pondering. “Hopefully this experience will teach him better judgment. Maybe what you’re doing will show him that his current methods aren’t helping him.”

She sighed “So you think I’m doing the right thing?”

He thought for a moment “For now, let’s see how this affects him. Thank you for telling me Sabine, I’ll focus more on dispelling that darkness in his heart.”

So she had been right. There was something wrong. She grew fearful at that moment of what that might mean for Ezra. All of her dreads about his slipping into darkness came flooding back to her at once.

“Hey, it’s ok Sabine.” Kanan must’ve sensed her sudden anxiety and tried to console her. “We’ll help him recover from this. I promise.”

“What can I do?” she questioned desperately. “How can I help when I have no idea what is happening with him?!”

Kanan took a breath and hesitated “Just keep your distance for a while. I’ll handle it for now.”

That wasn’t what she wanted to hear, but at the same time she was glad to let Kanan take over. He was a Jedi, he clearly understood this whole light side, dark side thing. She didn’t have a clue as to what it meant, so Kanan was obviously the most qualified to help Ezra.

“Alright.” She agreed.

“I’ll make sure Hera doesn’t pair you up for a while. Then I’ll work with him more, you just focus on your missions, ok?” Kanan sounded so sure, so confident that this would all work out, that she had to believe him.

“Yeah.” She nodded, more for herself knowing he couldn’t see the action. “Thanks Kanan.”

As she left he called after her “It’ll be alright Sabine.”

“Let’s hope so.” She mumbled. She didn’t like being mad at Ezra, but right now she knew it would take time to fix what had happened.

She remembered her fear and trepidation when he’d used his powers to control the driver of a walker to help them escape with Hondo. “When did Kanan teach you that?” she had asked him warily. His response had sent chills down her spine “He didn’t.” What exactly had that meant? Obviously there was more going on here than she could see.

It took a while to trust him fully again and she could clearly see Hera’s looks of worry and sympathy directed her way whenever Ezra mouthed off to Kanan, questioned orders, or was angry at something. Slowly, they all noticed him changing. He was gradually happier than before and not as defiant. He stopped trying to argue all the time and was more compliant to orders from Hera and Kanan.

He still wasn’t perfect, but then again neither was she. Zeb hadn’t commented too much on their lack of interaction, but he would lay a massive hand on her shoulder when she looked too sad.

Eventually the Lothalian boy started to behave more Ezra like and she would speak with him more. They could have a conversation now and even joke around, but it wasn’t prolonged and comfortable like it had been before. 

They returned to base one day after another mission. Apparently Kanan, Rex, Ezra, and Chopper had ran into some old battle droids and had quite a little war. They'd also found a shuttle to become another Phantom.

She looked over the new ship now, picking out designs in her head of what to paint on it. This is what brought back a memory of her and Ezra painting a stolen fighter together when they were younger. She realized in that moment that she missed his friendship enough to give him a second chance. Finding him on base in the mess hall, she approached. “This seat taken?” she asked standing across the table from him.

He looked up and the sweetest smile that nearly broke her heart bloomed on his face. “It’s always open for you.”

She sat down and debated with herself of what to say. It was Ezra however, that started the discussion.

“I’m sorry for being a jerk.” He sighed, pushing away his nearly empty tray. “Wedge isn’t a creep and if you like him then that’s your choice. I wasn’t thinking clearly back then.”

Her forehead creased “Ezra, I’m sorry for being so unfriendly. I just…”

“It’s fine!” He interrupted quickly. “I realize why you did it. I was an idiot. You can like him if you want.”

“Ezra.” She waited till he looked at her to continue. “I don’t like him like that.”

“You don’t?” he seemed surprised.

“No Ezra, I don’t.” she watched him stare at the table between them, fidgeting with his fingers distractedly.

 There was a long silence before he spoke softly “I miss you.”

Her smile was painful “I miss you too.” She had to look away as she confessed her worries “You were gone…You weren’t the Ezra I knew.”

She heard him shift in his seat as he leaned forward. “I know. For a while there I didn’t even know who I was anymore.”

Her gaze flashed back to his face, scanning over his distraught features. She placed a hand palm up on the table “Hey.”

He looked at her for a moment “You’re not going to hurt me are you?”

She chuckled “Not if you’re nice.”

He reached out and took her offered hand in his, breathing a sigh of relief. “Sabine, I need you.”

Her heart stopped for half a second. What was he going to say? Was this going to turn into a proclamation of love? She started plotting her exit route, but was waylaid but his next statement.

“I need someone to tell me when I’m not being me, and you helped me see that. I tried to deny what Kanan was telling me about the dark side and how it can overtake you, but after you pushed me away…” He paused and she tightened her grip on him, urging him to continue. “Yes, I was angry at you, and I felt like I hated you and Kanan for teaming up against me, but then…” He cut off his speech again and she waited patiently. “Sabine, I realized that I didn’t want to be alone again.”

He had told her before about how much he hated being alone on Lothal. He’d told her about how every time he’d find a new friend or ally, he would always end up on his own again. That is, until he fell in with their crew. It tugged at her heart to see his breaking in front of her.

“Sabine, I realized I was the one isolating myself and I was causing my own worst fear to come true.” He took a deep breath. “I don’t want to be like that anymore, so I’m asking you to help. Will you tell me if I ever get out of line again?”

She raised her eyebrows “Oh you know I will.” She watched him half smile and felt her heart melt. She wanted nothing more in this moment than to hug him.

Being in a public place however, wasn’t the best atmosphere for her. She stood and pulled his hand causing him to stand as well. “Come on.”

She led him out into the base and found a secluded place amongst crates stacked up in rows. Releasing his hand she threw her arms around him.

“Sa…Sabine?” he stammered.

“Shut up and hug me.” She muttered into his shoulder. He was getting too tall.

His arms enclosed around her, holding her gently. She could feel him breathing, his chest rising and falling steadily within her grasp. He leaned his cheek against her pale and purple hair, tugging her tighter to him. She breathed in his scent and wished that this moment could continue forever.

When he finally loosened his hold on her, she pulled away looking up into his eyes. “You’re not alone Ezra.” A single tear fell down her face.

His hand came up to her cheek, his thumb rubbing away the trail. “I know that now.”

He didn’t withdraw his hand from her face, while still gazing steadily into her eyes. Three seconds, four seconds, five… she lost count as a new feeling flooded through her veins, causing her mind to go numb. His gaze shifted to her lips and her heart jumped as he leaned in slightly. He hesitated and looked back into her eyes, his eyebrows twitching slightly in an unspoken question. She realized he was silently asking permission to kiss her and her heart broke.

 She couldn’t let him.

She managed to shake her head and let out an unsteady breath as she lowered her forehead to his shoulder. His hand left her cheek and his arms wrapped around her again.

What was she doing? Her heart pounded, her breathing was rapid and shallow. She couldn’t do it. This was Ezra. Little Lothalian padawan Ezra. Her friend. Think of how complicated things would become!

Part of her was glad she’d stopped, part of her hated herself for even getting this close to him, and part of her wanted to pull his head down and kiss him.

“I can’t.” she managed to say in a strangled voice. “I’m sorry, I can’t.” her voice fell away to a whisper.

He released her and placed his hands on her upper arms “It’s ok Sabine. I get it.”

She doubted he did, but stayed quiet.

“I think you’re amazing.” He admitted letting go of her. “Nothing would make me happier, believe me, but I don’t expect you to like me in the same way.”

She decided to let him think that was the reason. It was easier than trying to convince him that she didn’t know if this could work right now. If she told him her true feelings she was worried he wouldn’t want to wait for a relationship. Right now though, she couldn’t handle it and kept silent on the matter.

“Just so we’re clear, this never happened.” she said pushing away. His expression looked slightly hurt and she smiled “I can’t have my tough reputation tarnished Ezra.” She winked.

He laughed “Ok, ok, I get it. I won’t tell anyone that you secretly loooove hugging.”

“Thanks.” She grinned. “Let’s go home?”

He nodded and followed her back to the Ghost.

“Have you thought about how you’re going to paint the new Phantom?” he asked.

She nodded “Yep, wanna help? It’ll be like the TIE on Lothal.”

She caught the warm smile on his face at the fond memory. “You bet I’ll help. I’ll probably just get in the way again though.” He laughed “I was trying so hard to impress you back then.” He shook his head “I can’t believe how dumbstruck in love I was.”

Was? She didn’t question it out loud, but wondered if he really was losing feelings for her…but then he’d just tried to kiss her…why were boys so confusing?

Things got easier after that. He still slipped up every now and then, but she’d talk to him about it afterwards. She avoided a lot of physical contact with him just because it wasn’t in her nature, but also because she didn’t want to encourage his getting too attached to her.

There were times though, that she could comfortably lean against him or he would brush past her without her snarky retaliation.

They grew closer, becoming better friends. She still worried about the dark side, she still argued with herself about her feelings for him, but all in all things were good.

 

Art by Meldy-arts of Tumblr. Find more art [HERE](http://meldy-arts.tumblr.com/tagged/myart)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So after this idea popped into my head I went back and re-watched season three episodes. You definitely see a shift in his behavior after Antilles Extraction. He’s going back to being Ezra rather than a crazy. I don’t think she stayed away from him too long, but he definitely had to deal with some moody teenage baggage.  
> By the time they hit the episode "Imperial Supercommandos" things are a lot better between them in my opinion.  
> Moral of the story: blueberry should not be a blackberry. And Sabine hugs lothcats.


	10. Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set sometime after "Visions and Voices." Sort of continuation to chapter 5.

Sabine yawned, looking at her newest creation. She recognized with some satisfaction that she’d hit a stopping point in this particular project.

Stretching her arms over her head she looked around her room, coming out of her tunneled focus she had been in. Wiping off her hands she retrieved her chrono and scowled at it. She’d stayed up way too late again. She reached her hand under the back of her tank top massaging her muscles to ease the stiffness there.

Art had a power to make time fly. She would get into a project and end up losing track of how long she’d been working.

Passing her parched tongue over dry lips she decided it was a good idea to at least drink something before trying to sleep. Dehydration wasn’t something she needed to deal with on a mission. Better to take care of herself during down time.

Creeping quietly to the galley and fetching a cup, she stood in the low lighting, drinking down the cool liquid and listening to the hum of the ship around her. It was a sound she’d come to associate with home. Whenever she slept on base it took her a while to adjust to the differences.

“Sabine?” a whisper called out to her.

Nearly dropping her glass she jumped, spinning around to find Ezra standing in the open door way.

“Don’t scare me like that!” she hissed back, breathing deep to slow her heart rate.

“Sorry.” He grimaced with a little shrug. “What are you doing up?”

She took another sip before answering, watching him retrieving his own drink. “Art.”

He smiled “Should’ve guessed that.”

“You?” she asked, studying the way his lips pressed against the edge of his cup.

He lowered the drink and looked at the wall across from him. “Bad dream.”

She felt sympathy for his plight and moved to sit at the table motioning him over. “Wanna talk about it?”

He sat across from her, but remained quiet.

“You don’t have to.” She assured him. “Only if you want to.”

He rolled the sleeves of his pajama top up to his elbows and shook his head “No, I’ll tell you.”

She tried not to focus on the muscles his forearms, watching him take a breath and place both hands around his cup on the table.

“It was about what happened on Dathomir.” Lines creased his forehead “How you and Kanan got possessed.”

Ah. She had tried to push that experience from her own mind recently, but it apparently kept haunting him as well.

“Yeah.” She said “I wouldn’t imagine that was a fun experience for you. It wasn’t for me.”

His eyes flicked to hers “Oh, I guess I never asked what happened while… I mean… What was it like?” When she closed her eyes he stammered “You don’t have to say…I just…all I meant was…”

She shook her head and smiled “It’s fine Ezra.” He calmed down and she opened her eyes again. “What happened to you in the cave?”

He sucked in his lower lip and released it. She could see the faint teeth marks on the underside denoting he’d bitten it pretty hard. “You and Kanan’s eyes were glowing green and you attacked us.” His forehead creased again, recalling the trauma he'd been through. “I was scared that I’d hurt you or you’d hurt me. I told Maul not to do anything to Kanan and we ran to the mouth of the cave. You wouldn’t follow us outside because the Nightsisters needed to stay near their alter. Maul tried to get me to go with him and become his apprentice.” A shock of fear zapped through her. Ezra could’ve been gone for good. “But I couldn’t leave you two there, so I went back in and you had the black lightsaber at that point.”

“Darksaber.” She corrected.

“Yeah, Maul told me you could explain it to me.” He mentioned casually tilting his head.

She felt her hatred for Maul rise up again. He had no right to anything to do with Mandalore including the Darksaber. It belonged to her family, and now to her.

“Then of course I used the Force to push you out of the cave so the creepy Nightsister would leave you alone. I’m glad it worked.” He finished, a distracted look on his face.

She nodded thoughtfully. “Well then, not too intense.” She teased, trying to lighten his mood.

He breathed a slight laugh “Not at all. How was it for you?”

Her smile disappeared “Different.” Making eye contact again, she saw the concern in his gaze. “But, nothing I couldn’t handle.” She swallowed another mouthful of water and debated what to tell him. “I saw myself attacking you. I had no control over my own body. Then I saw… things…” she wavered in her resolve to tell him about it, nervously picking at dried paint spots on her hands.

“Things?” he questioned curiously.

“Visions I guess you could say.” She ran a finger distractedly around the rim of her cup. “I saw things from the past on Mandalore, my family, and how the Nightsisters would help me gain power to rule my people if I agreed to join them. Not that I’d take their help anyway.” She snarled. A small proud smirk on his face made her heart skip and she refocused. “Then they showed me their plan to rebuild their clan.” The picture they had fabricated of her and him together, flashed through her thoughts again. There was a sudden powerful tug in her lower stomach that hit her like a punch. She gripped her cup, fighting for control of her feelings.

“Which was what?” he asked casually, obviously having no idea what she meant.

She drank the last of her water to give her a moment to delay. “They wanted us to make little creepy babies for them to raise.”

“What?” She looked at him pointedly and saw confusion turn into realization on his face. “Wait…”

She felt like stopping this before he asked too much.

“They wanted us… me and you… to…” he didn’t need to say the last words for his question to make sense.

She nodded “Exactly. Can you believe that?” she huffed looking away and trying to control the rising heat in her neck.

“And they showed you that?” His voice rasped and he cleared his throat. “What did you see exactly?”

Oh seven hells, “Why are you asking this?” she confronted defensively.

He held up his hands, palms to her in surrender “No, I just…you didn’t see us…doing that… did you?”

She rolled her eyes “Yes I did, ok? They showed me how they wanted to use us, the end.” She crossed her legs and arms withdrawing in on herself and putting up her barriers.

A clear blush flushed his face. “How much did you see?”

She groaned in frustration. “Ezra, if you’re asking if I saw you naked then yes.”

He dropped his face into his hand and scrubbed his fingers through his short hair. “Ok then.” He looked like he was trying to hide from her.

She chuckled slightly at his embarrassment “Not everything though, the important parts were hidden.” She admitted.

He let out a huff of breath dragging his head from his arms. “Well I guess that makes it better.” She would glance at him occasionally in the silence, watching the blush start to recede from his face before his eyes finally made contact with hers again. “Well?”

She squinted. “Well what?” What else did he want her to say?

The grin that formed on his face couldn’t be good. “Did you like what you saw?”

Her mouth dropped open. She instinctively stood and grabbed her cup, flinging the contents at him. He flinched, but then realized the glass had been empty as only a few drops dribbled onto the table.

She looked at it in disappointment. Darn, she shouldn’t have drank it all.

Looking back to him she was surprised at the feral grin that had spread across his face. He moved his hand and gripped his own still half full cup.

“Don’t” she warned, moving away from the table slowly. Jedi reflexes must’ve allowed him to reach out and grab her wrist keeping her in range as he stood and held the cup in the air. “Ezra!” she warned again in panic as he started tilting it over her head.

“Shhhhh!” he cautioned laughing quietly “You’ll wake everyone up!” he whispered, cackling at her.

“Put it down!” she hissed back, still trying to pull away. She could easily break away if she wanted, but she was concerned that he’d just fling the water all over her if she did.

“Ok fine.” He lowered it back to the table and she sighed in relief. “But, to be fair, you did try to do that to me.”

“Yeah, because you were being gross.” She accused.

He let out a quiet laugh “Hey, if it was an image they made up, I need to know if they got it right. Can’t have them lying to you about how good I look.”

“Or don’t look.” She rolled her eyes.

“Ouch.” He held a hand to his heart. “You hurt my feelings.” He snickered.

She smiled at his antics before remembering something else. “Oh yeah, they also said that you’d be my slave, so I guess that could’ve been a win.”

He snorted “Yeah right.”

“No I’m serious!” she grinned “You would have to do anything I asked if I joined them. It was pretty convincing.”

“Ha, ha.” He said sarcastically. He glanced back to the table and swept up the cup. She braced herself to fight him off, but he knelt before her holding up the drink to her. “Oh mighty Sabine, is this what you wanted.” He smirked up at her facetiously, clearly making fun of her.

She cocked an eyebrow and accepted the cup. “Thank you slave.” She made to drink it, but thought of a better idea.

In one fluid movement she tipped it out over his head.

He gasped, standing and backing away, trying to sweep the water off of himself. She had to cover her mouth to keep from laughing too hard at his glare.

He sighed in defeat. “I guess I walked into that one.”

She nodded “You sure did.” She curled her hand into a fist, biting lightly at her forefinger to keep from bursting out again in laughter.

He groaned in disappointment and reached over his head grasping the back of his shirt and pulling it off in one swift move.

She froze.

He used it to dry off his arms, chest, and short clipped hair. She let her eyes drift down his body.

His broad shoulders, chest, toned abs. His pants were balanced low on his hips giving her plenty to look at, including the dark trail of hair leading her eyes further down. She felt a pull again and swallowed heavily, her tongue darting over her lips.

She looked away as he lowered his arms. Throwing his shirt down on the floor he started mopping up the water. “You just wait Sabine.” He threatened “I’ll get you back when you least expect it.” He grinned up at her.

She managed to smile tightly. “Oh I’m sure.” As he went back to his task, she watched how his back muscles twined and clenched.

She had to sit down.

Going back to the table she fidgeted at its surface, swiping away the stray drops that had fallen there. Anything to keep from looking at him. From what she’d seen in real life, the vision had been, so far, anatomically correct. He stood and turned away, placing his shirt in the sink and rinsing out the dirt that had been picked up from the floor.

Hera kept the ship extremely clean, but there was always residuals when one looked close enough. Deciding to be useful, she picked up both empty cups and made her way over to him. “Here.”

She handed them off and noticed, now that she was closer, there were small imperfections and bruises on his back. She was so near to him she could easily trace up his spine with her fingers and kiss the small freckles on his shoulder blade. That is all it would take, she reasoned, for him to turn around and crash his lips to hers. He could place her on the counter and she could explore the rest of his torso with her hands while he licked and nipped at her neck. Their tongues would entwine as she would rake her fingers over his scalp and he would pull her hips against his roughly.

The pull in her lower abdomen hit again and she closed her eyes. She wanted him so badly.

“I’ll just deal with this tomorrow.” He commented, trying to wring out his shirt completely in the sink.

She shoved down her feelings again. Trying to bury them deep inside to where they couldn’t resurface.

He turned around and seemed surprised she was still standing so close. “Did you need something?” he asked, moving aside from the sink as if he had been blocking her.

She shook her head and moved away from him. “Nope. Goodnight.” She made for the door, but he moved forward.

“Hey Sabine.” She stopped suddenly and he bumped into her from behind. “Sorry.” He stepped away quickly.

She clenched her teeth as her mind brought forth the scenario that he had stayed with his front pressed to her back and ran his hands down her arms. She was glad female arousal wasn’t outwardly visible for the most part, and that her shorts were a dark color.

 The slickness still felt uncomfortable though.

“I just wanted to say thanks for letting me talk to you.” He said quietly. She wouldn’t turn to face him. “I hope it’s all over now. With Maul and everything that happened.” There was a pain in his voice.

She took a deep breath and rerouted her emotions. “I hope so too.” She was shocked when his arms folded around her shoulders from behind. The rest of his body was distanced from hers and she was thankful for it. No need to get worked up again.

“It was my fault that happened to you and Kanan. I’m sorry.” He breathed, pressing his face against the side of her head. She brought her hands to his forearms linked over her collarbone.

“We would’ve come after you no matter what Ezra. Things happen and we can’t control it, but you don’t need to blame yourself.” She leaned her chin on his arm.

Her raw need had fizzled down and she was able to focus on her compassion for him.

“Thanks.” She heard him whisper against her hair. They remained for a moment longer before he unhooked his arms. “You smell like paint.” He smirked, drawing away from her.

 She peeked back at him. “Wait, you know what I smell like?” She mocked, her eyebrows raising.

A grin passed over his face at the memory of himself saying the same thing to her on Lothal a long time ago in a sewer. “Very funny. I was a little desperate for attention back then.” he chuckled lightly.

“Just back then?” She scoffed.

“Shouldn’t you get some sleep?” He scowled playfully.

“Yep, and you should too.” she smiled at him earnestly, letting her gaze linger on his.

“Am I interrupting something?” They both jumped as Zeb’s voice broke the silence. He appeared from the hall and leaned half in the door way, his arms crossed over his chest.

She looked up at her purple older brother, seeing the smirking taunt on his face. “Obviously not. I think you’d know if you were.” She sassed as she walked past him. “Goodnight.”

She heard his low rumbling laughter and Ezra stammering to explain the situation as she walked away.

Entering her room she shut the door and clunked her forehead against it.

Just great…

She’d either have rumor control to do tomorrow when Zeb’s taunts inevitably resurfaced with Hera and Kanan present, or Ezra would find a way to explain why they were standing in the dark together with his shirt off that didn’t suck.

Better start planning for rumor control. She climbed into her bed and let out a long sigh. She’d had desires before, but none that strong…and he wasn’t even doing anything to her.

She was in big trouble if just the idea of him could call forth that much of a reaction.

Hopefully they’d keep busy enough for her not to think about it again.

For a while at least.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, if you go back to chapter 1 of these drabbles, a friend of mine wrote a really good companion piece to it. Link is at the bottom of the chapter.


	11. Future again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pregananant Sabine.

 

 

“Ow!” Sabine hissed through her teeth, sitting up and wincing.

“What’s wrong?” Ezra’s sleepy voice sounded next to her on the bed.

“Your child is trying to kick its way out.” She groaned and shifted positions again, tugging the sheets off of her.

“Well, she is half Mandalorian.” He mumbled.

“It’s certainly acting like it.” She ran a hand over her swollen stomach. “I think it’s trying to dislodge a rib.” She gasped as it happened again. “Or two.”

His hand reached out and slid over her rounded bump. Not long from now they would be parents.

“Can you feel it?” She asked as another kick came from the child.

“She’s really strong.” He looked up at her from his resting place on the pillow. "I thought that was a good thing."

“I know. But that doesn’t mean it needs to prove it, and how do you know it’s a girl?” Was he able to know things she didn’t? They had wanted to be surprised at the sex of their baby when it was born, but Ezra had recently began calling it a her.

“I don’t.” He admitted “I just think having a girl would be fun.”

Sabine huffed “Girls are complicated Ezra, boys just run around and cause mayhem. Are you sure you’re ready to raise a girl?”

He bit his lip, seemingly to keep from smiling too broadly “Well if she takes after you, I don’t know if I can handle the mayhem.”

“Did you just call me a boy?” She glowered.

He laughed “I’m just saying, if that’s all boys do, you’re pretty good at imitating it.”

She rolled her eyes. “I’m pretty sure you know for a fact I’m not a boy.”

He yawned “Maybe.”

“Ah!” a sharp pain went through her again.

His hand drifted lower on her stomach and his eyes closed. His breathing changed and she realized he was using the Force.

She’d watched him do this before, and had been perplexed and terrified all at the same time. His Force powers were always a mystery to her. She knew he’d never do anything to hurt her or their child, but for some reason she was always a little hesitant about him doing this. She blamed her ingrained Mandalorian superstitions of the Force.

“She’s not happy.” He said at last “I can feel her discomfort through the force. She’s squished.”

“Well it’s getting a little big to be in there.” Sabine laid back down, seeking a better position of comfort, for her and her little one. Ezra curled closer, placing kisses to her shoulder. “Better?” she asked, still a little nervous that he was communing with the entity inside her.

He was silent for a while and she wondered if he had just gone back to sleep.

“She’s fine now.” He whispered finally.

No further kicks had come yet, so she assumed he was right.

“She loves you Sabine. If you could only feel this.” He’d said things like that before. If only you could feel this. Oh, don’t get her wrong, she would love to, but at the same time it was a bit unnatural to be able to feel someone else’s feelings.

“Does it talk to you? Like, do you hear a voice?” she always wondered whether he was only feeling emotions or hearing words from the baby.

“Her mind is just feelings right now. She’s really good at specifics though. I didn’t feel this much feedback with Dawn when Hera was pregnant with her.” Back then, Kanan had told him about connecting with the unborn child in Hera’s womb and let him try.

“Maybe because it knows you’re the daddy.” She suggested.

Ezra smiled “Yeah, maybe that’s it.”

“What else can you feel?” she questioned as he still remained connected to her child.

“She’s scared to be born. She doesn’t want to leave you.” He shifted his hand again. “I’m trying to comfort her and tell her we'll still be here.”

Sabine looked down at her bump “Tell it I’m excited to see it." She smiled before another thought came to her mind. "No wait!” she placed a hand over his “Don’t tell it anything or we might end up with it coming out now!”

He chuckled and kissed her shoulder again. “Calm down Sabine. You’re not helping me put her at ease.” He placed his hand, warm and calm over hers. 

She took a breath realizing her own panic might be affecting her baby. Was that simply a mother/child bond? Or was this little one a Jedi as well and able to sense her emotions by the Force?

Thoughts of her mother’s inevitable sarcastic disapproval entered her mind. That woman would always take a shot at the fact Ezra was a Jedi whenever they came around. Now she’d have more to grumble satirically about.

“She’s still not ready. Don’t worry.” He concluded. “And she got mad at me for making you scared.”

“But it wasn’t you.” She stated the obvious.

“Yes, but she blames me for it anyway. It’s never your fault, just mine.” He complained lightly.

“Well, definitely my child then.” She smiled, wiggling down into the mattress contentedly.

He laughed and moved his hand higher. “She wants you to sing. Or she’ll kick again.”

“Now you’re just making things up.” She accused. She would often hum an old lullaby she knew to calm the nerves she felt at becoming a mother, and to hopefully lull her child to sleep.

A kick sent a sharp pain into her side. “Ah!”

Ezra laughed “I told you she would.”

She rolled her eyes. “Alright I’ll sing, but you tell it that its attitude needs to go.” She smirked “It’s obviously yours if it’s this much trouble for me.”

He smiled and she hummed her song.

As she sang she looked at Ezra’s face, eyes still closed in concentration. Maybe having a Jedi husband wasn’t the worst thing ever like her mother and others had tried to tell her. How many women get to talk to their baby before it’s even born?

She closed her eyes and smiled as she hummed, hoping that she would get some more sleep this time. Her track record of sleep hadn’t been one to boast about lately, but now that Ezra was back from a trip and able to calm the child within her, she might just get what she needed.

...

Art by Meldy-arts on Tumblr Check out more [Here](http://meldy-arts.tumblr.com/)


	12. Choosing Me (Part I)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set before Ghosts of Geonosis, Sabine makes some important decisions. A story co-written by the talented Ciryc_Tal who wrote for Ezra in this chapter and has his own stories about Sabine and Ezra as well.

 

 

“Hey Sabine?” She looked up from her datapad to see a young familiar pilot approaching.

“Hi Wedge, what is it?” She asked, watching him shift his helmet to his other arm, probably having just gotten back from a training exercise.

“I was wondering if you wanted to catch lunch together?” he shrugged, fidgeting again with the helmet. She happened to glance over his shoulder and caught sight of some of the other male pilots that had gathered together and were not so sneakily watching them.

Sabine knew by now that she’d become somewhat of a target for the males her age. There weren’t a great deal of catchable girls on base and being a part of the Ghost crew gave her a mysterious side that wasn’t present in the other rebellion girls that lived in the base for the most part. A few of the other girls that were around her age had all hooked themselves into relationships pretty quickly and were off the market. She wasn’t blind to the boy’s advances and certainly not to Wedge’s.

“Yeah, sure.” She agreed. He was a friend after all, and she was hungry. She deserved a break.

“Are you going to the hangout gathering tonight?” He inquired, falling into step beside her after ditching his helmet in his fighter.

It wasn’t uncommon for the younger groups of rebels to gravitate towards each other and have after hours events. These mostly consisted of swapping stories of adventures, playing music, and sometimes silly games. Anything to keep the hardships of war at bay and stay positive.

“I’m not sure.” She confessed. Yes she’d enjoyed it when she’d gone in the past, but sometimes she just didn’t feel like being social.

They joined the hustle and bustle of the inner base, heading towards the mess hall.  

“You should!” Wedge encouraged. “I heard Max and Sella are going to sing a new song they’ve been working on.”

Now there was something she could look forward to. Not surprisingly, there was an abundance of creativity and talent on the rebel base. It seemed their little group attracted those that had had their gifts suppressed by the harsh fist of the Empire, and gladly took any opportunity to express themselves in the new freedom they had found here. She knew all too well the feelings of not being able to be herself in the Empire’s clutches.

The music scene on base was quite impressive and she did enjoy their time sitting in a circle around a few glowing heating units, listening to newly made up songs. Maybe she should go. Music is one of her passions after all.

“Sounds like fun.” She followed him through the mess doors.

“So you’re going then?” he pried, sounding hopeful.

She still didn’t know if she’d want to later that day, so she left it ambiguous. “We’ll see.”

Moving through the line and retrieving food she glanced around the room, dusting her gaze over the familiar faces gathered there. The dull roar of conversation and occasional laughter echoed through the space.

They sat together in an open spot and ate, discussing the details of his recent flight. “I’m just worried they’ll change known imperial protocol again and we’ll find ourselves in a mess.” He said pushing food around on the tray.

She nodded. “Oh they’ll change, but we’ll adapt.” That was always the play.

“Yeah... ” He hesitated. “I just wish it didn’t cost us so much every time though.”

Hard fact of war…casualties. Here on base they’d learned to be optimistic, but also live for the moment. A girl had even tried to convince Sabine once, that they could easily all die tomorrow and she should at least have some fun with a boy before that happened. They had been at one of the gatherings of younger rebels and she’d watched as the girl had progressed through the night, eventually ending up sitting on a boy’s lap making out with him. She made it look so easy.

Sabine held half envy, half disdain in her heart for a girl like that. She knew she could just as easily get whatever she wanted from a boy, but it was the aftermath she didn’t like. She’d seen the girl and her partners get along fine afterward, but not all the time. Personal strife in the ranks was certainly not encouraged.

She glanced up at the pilot across from her. He wasn’t half bad looking, but she was smart enough to realize that there wasn’t a possibility of doing the same thing with him. He wouldn’t agree to anything noncommittal would he? He was a good kid, but maybe a little too into her to be fling material. Although...

Speaking of boys that were into her…

Sabine caught sight of Ezra entering the mess. He was followed by Zeb’s hulking form and seemed to notice her as he looked around. She smiled briefly, turning back to the boy before her.

Wedge seemed to be watching her with interest “Well?”

Great. She realized she hadn’t been listening to him. “Sorry, what?”

“I asked if you wanted to go with me to the gathering tonight.” He stated “You seemed unsure before, so I thought if I asked you formally you’d go, and we could hang out.” He looked at her with an expectant gaze.

Her mind froze.

Wait...

Was he asking her on a date?

A real date?

“Uh…” she didn’t know what to say.

“Hey guys.” Zeb startled her as he plonked his tray down next to Wedge. Another tray slid onto the table next to hers and she looked up to find Ezra grinning down at her.

Zeb took a seat. “Don’t mind if we join you two, right?” The Lasat smirked at her and she did her best not to smile at him in relief of being rescued.

“No, not at all.” Wedge said sounding somewhat disappointed.

“So, what were you two talking about over here, alone, in the corner, all by yourselves?” Zeb’s gruff voice was full of innuendo and she knew about the rumors on base of her and Wedge.

If Zeb had gotten the idea that she liked him, he would certainly try to mock or intimidate the boy.

“Nothing.” She pointedly confronted, staring him down.

“We were talking about the gathering later tonight.” Wedge added. “I was just asking if she was going.” He looked at her, the question still heavy between them.

Sabine looked at Wedge, uncertain of how to answer him. It didn’t help that Ezra and Zeb were looking at her too. This was starting to get uncomfortable.

She was just about to open her mouth to respond when Ezra suddenly butted in. “Wedge, you’re sorta new here, so you probably don’t know that Sabine isn’t really a ‘gathering’ kind of person. She’s more of a loner - not much for social situations. Trust me, we’ve been working together for a _long_ time now, and I know her pretty well.”

Normally Sabine wouldn’t be offended at the way he described her, but when someone assumed to know her thoughts and opinions better than she did, it definitely rubbed her the wrong way. The cocky smirk on his face didn’t help.

“Wow Ezra, you really think you’ve got me figured out.” She huffed, the familiar feeling of annoyance towards him surfacing. Turning to Wedge she considered her options and decided to take a leap. Why not have a little fun? “Ok Wedge, I’ll go with you to the gathering tonight.” She stood taking her empty tray with her. “I’d better get my work done so I can get ready later.”

Walking away from the table she felt her all too stubborn independence returning to her, only to crash down once she realized what she’d agreed to.

Well, what could she do now? Looks like she’d gotten herself stuck into going with a boy to a public gathering and half the base already thought they were together for some reason. This would be the cover of the rebellion tabloid, if they had one.

Good job Sabine.

…

Not since Maul had Ezra wanted to beat the victorious smile of an enemy off his face. He fumed across the table at Wedge, who grinned smugly right back at him.

“Well, I’ve got some things I gotta take care of too. Maybe I’ll see you guys there?” Picking up his tray, Wedge stood and walked off, depositing his empty tray and heading out of the mess hall.

“Great!” Ezra shoved his tray aside and banged his head on the table, resting his hands on the back of his neck as he groaned in defeat.

“Well, young master Jedi,” Zeb teased. “It looks like in your infinite wisdom, you just sent the girl you love running off on a date with a _much_ more desirable mate.”

“Well, yeah, it’s not like he’s ugly or anything but-” Ezra stopped, lifting his head to meet Zeb’s eyes. “Wait, what exactly about him makes him so much more ‘desirable’ than me?”

Zeb shrugged. “Ezra, come on. He’s a pilot. If there’s anything I know about human girls, it’s that they _love_ pilots.”

“I’m a _Jedi!”_ Ezra reminded him, placing a hand on his chest. “I have a lightsaber! I can use the Force!”

“Aren’t Jedi famous for being celibate?” Zeb asked, taking a bite of cushnip.

“That...that wasn’t...I don’t…Kanan’s Not!” Ezra groaned again, his head sinking back onto the table.

“Look, kid. It’s your own fault. You should’ve known that Sabine doesn’t like it when other people try to speak for her,” Zeb said, sharply poking Ezra’s head.

Ezra looked up at Zeb and sighed. Zeb was right. Ezra had really screwed up there. “I know. But somebody had to shut that guy up.”

“Well, you’ve lost the battle, kid. But the war isn’t over yet.”

Ezra raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“It’s not like you just have to sit back and watch them until they get married with five kids!”

“Five? Why did you say five?” Ezra demanded in a panicky voice.

Zeb waved his hands in dismissal. “That’s not the point. Look, you’re still in this fight. So fight back! Do something about it!”

“Like what?” Ezra asked. How was he supposed to ‘fight’ for Sabine when she made it clear that she didn’t want him sticking his nose in her business? He already risked losing her friendship over Wedge once before, and he wasn’t sure if he could handle that again.

“I don’t know. Think! What would you, Jedi Ezra Bridger, do to retaliate against a guy who wants to steal your girl?”

 _Well, it’s not like she’s really_ my _girl,_ Ezra thought to himself. But he understood what Zeb meant. Wedge was a pilot. He was a Jedi. What could a Jedi do against a pilot?

Zeb snapped his fingers. “Maybe you could use the Force to make him forget about the date? Use one of your Jedi mind tricks on him?”

Ezra’s face suddenly turned serious. He thought about the time when he controlled the pilot of an Imperial walker to fire on his own allies. It was effective, and it did save their lives. But it didn’t change the fact that it was a technique rooted in the Dark Side. _No,_ Ezra told himself. _Never again. Nothing like that._

All of this was a bit heavy for the conversation, so he kept his answer simple. “No, I don’t think that would work. Besides, those kinds of tricks only work on the weak-minded, and as much as I hate to admit it, Wedge looks sharper than that.”

“Sharper, better-looking…” Zeb mumbled between bites of fral.

“Shut up!” Ezra snapped.

Zeb chuckled. Ezra was grateful Zeb was trying to help, but the teasing really wasn’t necessary.

Zeb swallowed a swig of water. “Look kid, you’re a Jedi, but what else are you?”

 _What else am I?_ Ezra thought about the question. “I’m...a guy?”

Zeb shook his head in frustration. “You’re a _rebel._ So you should try thinking like a rebel!”

 _Think like a rebel?_ What did that even mean? At least, how could that apply to this situation?

“You’re a rebel, fighting the Empire - a bigger, more powerful, and much better-looking enemy than yourself.”

“Do you really have to keep bringing up his looks?”

“Sorry, I just can’t help myself,” Zeb chuckled. “You really should see the face you make whenever I say that.”

Ezra glared at Zeb, but he was beginning to see Zeb’s point. He started thinking about the tactics that the Rebellion used to take down enemies that always had the clear advantages. _Hit and run. Ambushes. Guerilla warfare…_

“Reconnaissance!” Ezra’s eyes widened with understanding.

Zeb smirked, raising an eyebrow. “Keep going.”

“Wedge must have something planned to win over Sabine. And I just need to find out what it is so I can stop it!”

“Maybe. Or maybe he just plans to talk to her and just get to know her. Like a normal person.”

Ezra shook his head. “No, no way. I know Wedge. That crafty jerk has definitely got something planned.”

Zeb took another swig of water. “Well, how do you expect to find that out?”

Ezra’s brow furrowed. “What about a listening device?”

Zeb shook his head. “Those are all kept in inventory under close watch by AP-5. And there’s no way he’d let you walk away with one of those without authorization. Besides, if someone found a listening device in a pilot’s room on a military base, I’m pretty sure it would cause more trouble than it’s worth. Plus, Hera would never forgive me for that, seeing as I’m  chief of security around here.” He fearfully glanced to the side, as if imagining what Hera would do to him.

Ezra rested his chin in his hand in thought. Then, an idea struck him. “I’ve got it!”

“What?”

“Wedge is a pilot, right? So where do pilots spend most of their time when they’re not flying?”

Zeb smiled mischievously. “In the beds of beautiful young women?”

Ezra rolled his eyes. “No! The landing bay! I’ve got a full-faced pilot’s helmet in my room. I put that on, go to the bay, get within earshot of Wedge, and find out what he’s planning!”

Zeb smiled and took a huge bit of a meiloorun. Juices dripped down his furry chin as he gave Ezra a thumbs up. Energized and eager, Ezra leapt from his seat and sprinted out of the mess hall.

 _Just you wait, Wedge,_ Ezra thought, a determined look on his face. _The ace pilot is about to be outmaneuvered._

...

Zeb smiled as he watched Ezra race out of the mess hall. _Go get ‘im, kid._

Zeb’s eyes then turned to Ezra’s still uneaten meal.

 _We are fighting a war, after all,_ Zeb thought to himself as he pulled the tray toward him. _It’d be a shame to let good food go to waste..._

...

Ezra adjusted the pilot’s helmet on his head as he stepped through the blast doors that lead out to the landing bay. It was still early afternoon, and the hot Atollon sun beat down on him relentlessly. The flight suit that he had swiped from the laundry area wasn’t terribly hot, but having to wear the helmet with the visor all the way down his face was almost too much.

_Still, if I can find out what Wedge is planning to do tonight, it’ll all be worth it._

Ezra scanned the bay, looking for his mark. Amidst the docked A-wing interceptors, Y-wing bombers, and various other freighters and starfighters, a myriad of rebel soldiers, officers and pilots filtered in and out. Everyone was engaged in either moving supplies, signing datapads, or fixing ships. All the activity wasn’t going to make finding Wedge easy, but at least he would be able to keep a low profile in this crowd.

 _Wait a minute,_ Ezra realized. _This isn’t a mission against the Empire. All I’m trying to do is spy on someone who’s technically my ally!_ This didn’t require the usual level of spycraft.

Ezra walked over to an officer, probably a captain judging from his rank pins. Ezra saluted smartly. “Sir!”

The captain glanced at Ezra, rolled his eyes, then turned his attention back to the datapad. “Yes, cadet?”

Ezra didn’t even bother to look at the rank pins on his suit, but he didn’t doubt the captain knew what they meant. “I’m looking for Ensign Antilles. I’m, uh…supposed to be drilling with him later this afternoon.”

“Oh, Antilles?” the captain suddenly brightened up. “Good for you. Probably one of the best pilots we’ve got right now. You’ll definitely be able to learn a lot from him!”

Ezra suppressed a groan. _Great. How many fans does this guy have?_

“Just the other day in the simulator, he took down 4 enemy ships in under a minute! The kid is phenomenal!”

Now Ezra really wished he had found a flight suite with a rank higher than Wedge.

“Uh, yeah,” Ezra agreed, trying to steer the conversation back on course. “Really looking forward to working with him.” The words were poison in his mouth. “Could you tell me where I can find him?”

The captain nodded toward an A-wing at the far end of the landing bay. “He’s over there with Klivian. Ooh, ask Antilles about the Ralltiir Maneuver! It’s a good one!”

Ezra quickly saluted and headed in the direction the captain indicated. “I’ll do that, sir!”

_Not on your life._

Moving his way past maintenance droids and rebel recruits, Ezra reached the A-wing the captain pointed out to him. It was elevated on a hydraulic maintenance rack. Standing under the hull of the ship, his back turned to him, was Wedge Antilles. He appeared to be occupied with some repair just underneath the cockpit. Sitting on the top of the front of the hull, reclined against the cockpit, was Derek Klivian, better known as Hobbie. As the other pilot who escaped Skystrike academy with Wedge, the two were known to be very close friends. A toolbox was lying next to Hobbie, and Ezra guessed that he was supposed to be helping Wedge with the repair. But judging from his relaxed profile, he wasn’t being very helpful.

 _Perfect,_ Ezra thought to himself. _Cocky hotshots like Wedge are always bragging to their friends about girls._ Ezra walked over to a nearby crate full of tools and crouched over it. He tilted his head down and rifled his hands through the crate’s contents, pretending he was looking for something. With the helmet’s tinted visor concealing his line of sight, he could keep a close watch on Wedge.

“Hobbie, could you hand me that hydrospanner?” Wedge asked as he appeared to try to twist something under the ship. He stepped out from under the cockpit.

Hobbie sighed audibly, but complied. He tossed the tool to Wedge, who caught it effortlessly, then continued his work. Hobbie returned to his reclining position, groaning out loud. “Wedge, how much longer are you gonna be?”

“I just need to readjust this navigational drive. It’s still…kinda warped…” he grunted as he turned something inside the hull, which then sounded like it snapped into place. Wedge breathed a sigh of relief as he set down the hydrospanner and closed the hatch under the hull. “Of course, if you had actually helped me, we could’ve been done a long time ago.”

“Hey. Your ship, your repair,” Hobbie replied casually. “Besides, from up here, I’ve got a pretty good view of all the _ladies_.”

Ezra smiled. He hoped this would start the conversation he needed to hear.

“You know, Hobbie? Maybe you should try actually asking one of them out instead of just spying on them all the time?” Wedge suggested, looking up at his friend.

“Ask out who?” Hobbie retorted shortly. “All the cute ones on this base are unavailable anyway.”

Wedge smiled that cocky smile that Ezra hated so much. “Well, not _all_ of them.”

Hobbie suddenly sat up. “Wait a minute.” He eyed Wedge suspiciously. “You don’t mean…”

Wedge nodded, but said nothing.

“Mando girl?” Hobbie asked excitedly.

Wedge nodded again. “Tonight. At the gathering.”

Hobbie let out an annoying whoop, then jumped off the hull and started playfully punching Wedge’s arm. “You finally did it! Way to go, ace!” Wedge chuckled as he fended off Hobbie’s punches.

Ezra rolled his eyes under his helmet’s visor. _Pilots. Bunch of meat-headed jocks._

Wedge was now grinning from ear to ear. “Yeah, yeah. And I think tonight is gonna be the night I tell her. And I’ve thought of the perfect way!”

Ezra tensed. _Tell her? Tell her what? And what does he mean by the perfect way?_

Hobbie seemed to be curious too. “Well, what’s that?”

Wedge smiled and put a finger to his lips. “You’ll just have to wait and see. It’s a little something I’ve been working on for a while. In fact, I’m gonna go put on some finishing touches to it right now.” Wedge turned around and starting heading back to the base.

 _Karabast! He’s leaving already?_ Ezra lowered his head in panic. He was really nervous now. Wedge was definitely up to something shady, and if he put a lot of work into it, Ezra’s work might be cut out for him. _I can’t just follow him back to his room! What do I do now?_

“It’s the song, isn’t it?”

Ezra suddenly perked up at what Hobbie had just said. _Song? What song?_

Wedge stopped and wheeled around toward Hobbie again, a sour look on his face. “How did you know about that?”

Hobbie smirked. “Hey, you left it on your desk, and I just happened to walk by. After all, with a title like that, who could resist?” Hobbie starting laughing.

“Hobbie, come on, that’s private.” Ezra could see Wedge’s face start to turn red.

“What was it called again?” Hobbie asked, now bent over in laughter.

“Don’t say it!” Wedge warned him.

“PAINTER OF MY HEART!? HA HA HA HA HA!”

Ezra had to cover his mouth with his sleeve because he almost burst out laughing himself. That had to be the worst song title he had ever heard in his life!

Hobbie was now roaring with laughter, and some of the other passersby in the bay started looking at him and Wedge with confused expressions.

Wedge hurried over to Hobbie and pressed a hand over his mouth. “Will you keep it down? Nobody is supposed to know about that!”

Hobbie wrestled himself away from Wedge, wiping a tear from his eyes. “Aw, come on man! Are you telling me the galaxy is never going to hear the amazing talents of singer/songwriter Wedge Antilles?”

Wedge grimaced at Hobbie. But then, his expression suddenly turned confident. “Don’t worry, Hobbie. Because after Max and Sella are finished performing their new song, they’re going to play backup while I sing mine!”

 _So that’s it!_ Ezra thought he couldn’t hate Wedge more than he already did, but now he was certain he hated him more than the Empire and the Sith combined. After painting and blowing things up, music was the thing that Sabine loved the most. _Why didn’t I think of that?_ Ezra berated himself.

Hobbie had calmed down from his laughter. “From those lyrics, it might be a little obvious that the song is about Mando girl. You sure you want to single her out like that?”

Wedge shook his head. “No. I’ve only put in subtle hints that it’s about her. Believe me, the only ones who’ll know are she and I.” He frowned at Hobbie. “And, you, I guess.”

Hobbie put a hand on Wedge’s shoulder. “Well, I’ve never met anyone with a voice like yours. She’ll be all over you by the time you’re done.”

Ezra was hoping for the possibility that Wedge was delusional about how good a singer he was, but Hobbie’s endorsement didn’t bode well. _That jerk is going to sing a romantic song about Sabine in front of everyone tonight, and there’s a really good chance he’s going to sound amazing._

_This is bad…_

Wedge laughed, trying to hide his obvious embarrassment. “Thanks, Hobbie. I really hope she likes it. Anyway, I gotta get back to the room and make sure it’s perfect for tonight. I’ll see you later!” Wedge waved as he turned and ran back to the base.

Ezra’s heart sunk. Not only was Wedge an amazing pilot, but he was a singer and songwriter too? _What am I supposed to do against someone like that?_

“Hey, you need help finding something?”

Ezra’s head snapped up when he realized that Hobbie was now calling to him. Grabbing a fusioncutter from the crate, he quickly stood, keeping his head slightly down so as to make sure his eyes were completely hidden. Ezra cleared his throat and answered in a disguised voice.

“Uh, yeah! Just needed a fusioncutter! Got lots of…fuses to cut. Anyway, gotta go!” Without waiting for a response from Hobbie, Ezra jogged away from the A-wing and back to base to find Zeb.

_Now what am I gonna do?_

...

Sabine went back to her duties on base, briefly checking with AP-5 that the inventory list she was looking at was accurate.

So far so good.

She was looking over the list of weaponry when she caught sight of Sella in the cargo area walking towards her.

“Hey Sabine.” the girl smiled warmly. “You coming to the thing tonight? Max and I just finished our new song we’d been working on. We’d love to hear your opinion.”

Sabine nodded “Yeah, I’ll be there.” She grimaced realizing she couldn’t exactly back out now.

“Good! Of course when I say we finished the song I mean it’s good enough for now. I can never stop tweaking the tune.” She waved a hand around gracefully.

Sella was a talented musician. She and her boyfriend Max often performed together either acapella or with some stringed instruments.

“So are you gonna sit next to anyone? Or are you going to be a loner again?” Sella looked her over raising one eyebrow.

Maybe Ezra had been _too_ accurate in his description of her.

“Why do I have to sit next to someone? We all out of single seats?” Sabine countered. She was great at witty banter naturally and knew how to keep people off balance, but this was one girl she knew wouldn’t be distracted easily.

“Well you’ve already told me you don’t have a thing for Bridger, but what about Antilles?” Sella placed her hands on her hips. She was always so forward. “There must be someone you think is a little attractive here.”

Sabine’s mind flashed back to how Ezra’s eyes always seemed to suck her in, and how his smile was disarming.

“Not really.” she lied, going back to the files on the data pad. She meant to keep working, but she couldn’t focus on anything, and the words on her screen were all but making sense.

“Oh come on!” Sella laughed, sitting down on a crate beside Sabine and patting the open space next to her.

Sabine really didn’t want to have this conversation. “I have to get back to-”

Sella reached up and pulled Sabine’s arm, causing her to stumble onto the crate. “Now that you’re sitting down, I have something to tell you.” Sabine looked at the girl next to her, seeing a wicked smile cross practically from ear to ear as she spoke in a whisper “I heard Antilles is going to ask you out for tonight!”

Sabine rolled her eyes “Well you’re a little late, cuz he already asked.”

Sella gasped “And you said yes! That’s why you’re coming tonight!” she giggled and tapped at Sabine’s shoulder armor. “I knew you liked him.”

She shook her head “Now wait a minute…”

Sella shushed her “You don’t need to say anything doll. I know what it’s like. Before Max asked me out the first time I did everything I could to get his attention, and everyone kept telling him to ask me, but he was way too shy, so...”

Sabine didn’t know if there was a point to all this babble, but she certainly didn’t want to end up in the gossip pool again. “Look, Sella. I think he’s nice and all, but I don’t think he and I-”

Again, the girl’s excitability took over. “Hold up!” She looked at Sabine as though scrutinizing her. “What are you trying to say? Why else would you want to go out with him unless…” She gasped and placed a hand across her mouth. “You’re trying to make Bridger jealous!”

Sabine rolled her eyes “Sella, I don’t think you understand at all.” This wasn’t going as planned.

The girl lowered her hand back into her lap “Oh, I think I know exactly what’s going on. I tried the same thing to get Max’s attention.” She curled a strand of hair behind her ear.

Sabine shook her head “No, Wedge asked me nicely and I decided to go, just to see what it’s like. I honestly don’t think anything will come of it and I _did not_ do it to make Ezra jealous.”

Sella threw her hands in the air “I swear!” she looked at Sabine, clearly not letting this go. “Don’t you think that either of them is cute? Let’s be honest, if I weren’t with Max I’d take a bite of Bridger.” She winked.

Sabines eyebrows shot up “Excuse me?” something struck a chord in her chest and she felt a flash of anger.

“You heard me.” the girl snickered “He’s a hottie.”

Sabine found herself suddenly relieved that Sella had Max.

“I mean have you seen his eyes? And those scars on his cheek? Mmmm.” Sella tilted her head back, wiggling a little in her seat.

“Ok, no.” Sabine said getting mad again.

Sella laughed “I mean you see it too right? And I’m not the only one that thinks he’s the hottest boy on base. If I didn’t have Max, I’d definitely let Bridger slide into my cockpit instead, if you get my meaning.” She bit her lip and winked at Sabine.

Sabine’s mouth fell open and she quickly closed it again, trying to recover her wit. “I didn’t know he was so popular.” she mumbled trying to mask her anger, her hands clenching the datapad.

“Oh yeah, you should definitely get out of your room on your ship and come stay in the barracks with us girls sometime. A bunch of us crowd into one room and talk about everything...and I do mean everything.” She paused flicking some dirt off her jumpsuit “You should come next time and tell us what it’s like with Wedge.”

Sabine scoffed “Well there won’t be much to tell since I’m not going to do anything with him.”

Sella stood and shrugged “You’re missing out. You could just come and give the other girls tips on getting Bridger’s attention, since you seem to have it all.”

Sabine chose not to answer. So, the other girls saw it too…

“I know you guys are good friends and all, but if it’s like you said before and you’re not attracted to him at all, then I don’t see why it would be a problem.” Sella was obviously trying to coax something out of Sabine.

“Maybe I will come hang out with you one night.” Sabine let a fake smile prove her willingness that really didn’t exist.

“Awesome! And if you happen to have any holos of a shirtless Bridger I’m sure the girls would love it.” Sella giggled again.

Sabine counted that course of action out right away. Why would she go and let a room full of other girls drool over Ezra? Then again...why not? They weren’t a couple, she had no right to feel this protective over him other than the fact that they’d known each other for so long.

She thought of Wedge again and his attempts to get her attention. He wasn’t as bad as Ezra used to be when they first met, and he was surprisingly polite for having been a Corellian freighter pilot.

He was attractive in his own way, but she found that her opinion of him, or perhaps attraction to him wasn’t as strong.

Sabine had known for a while now that she had some feelings for Ezra.

Would she ever tell him that?

Never.

Would she ever tell anyone else?

Also never.

She knew she’d cared for him from the start to be honest. They’d become friends, family, comrades in arms, and so much more than she’d ever planned. She remembered the fondness she had for him when they were younger and how she always wanted to look out for him and protect him. As they grew closer and grew up, the feelings remained, but changed. She knew he could take care of himself now, and she also knew that he could protect her. She respected him now and she knew he respected her.

Maybe it was this closeness with him that kept her second guessing Wedge. Feelings did take time though…

What if she just needed to give Wedge a chance?

But Ezra…

She then felt herself torn in half between what she wanted and what was sensible. She couldn’t afford a relationship right now anyway. What was a relationship even for? It didn’t provide you money or a guarantee of making it through the next battle.

She understood the want for affection and the need for love, and had definitely experienced the temptation of physical desires. But all in all, why did she need to be with someone?

She resolved in her mind to see how things went tonight, but she wasn’t sure she going to be caught up in anything resembling a permanent relationship.

“Anyways.” Sella scuffed her boot on the ground. “I think you and Wedge make a cute couple.”

Sabine shook her head, unsure about her wants at the moment.

“Don’t shake your head at me!” Sella took her by surprise with her harshness. “I think you and Wedge would make a good team and he’s a very thoughtful guy. Maybe you could give it a try and see where things go. If it doesn’t work out then hey, you’ll know. But if you never give him a chance, who’s to say you wouldn’t miss out on the greatest thing that could’ve happened to you?”

Her words left Sabine speechless.

“Think on that.” Sella smiled before turning on her heel “I’ve gotta go. See you tonight.”

...

Ezra paced back and forth in his and Zeb’s room, arms crossed and brow knitted deep in thought. Meanwhile, Zeb just sat on his bunk, his hands folded in front of his face in thought.

 _Think, Ezra! Think!_ But Ezra couldn’t think. He was too distracted by the fact that another guy had written a romantic song for Sabine and was going to perform it in front of everyone! _What if everyone in the base starts encouraging them? What if they start cheering? And what if Sabine loves it so much that she runs right into that slimeball’s arms and kisses him?_

But then again, could he blame her? Clearly Wedge had something to offer her that he couldn’t. Wedge was an artist. Sabine was an artist. Of course they’d be perfect together…

Ezra stopped pacing. “Zeb, maybe we should just forget this.”

“Huh?” Zeb perked up. “What are you talking about?”

“I mean, we’ve been thinking about this for an hour, and we haven’t gotten anywhere! There’s just nothing that I can do to stop this from happening! Even if there was, there’s no way Sabine would respect me if I did it in front of everyone!”

“You’re giving up?” Zeb asked, dissatisfaction in his voice.

“Maybe it’s for the best. Besides, it’s pretty much pointless. No matter what I do or what I say, there’s just nothing that’s going to make Sabine feel for me the way I do for her.” Ezra took a deep breath. “Maybe I should just leave them alone.”

Deep inside, Ezra knew that Wedge was an okay guy. He didn’t like him, but he also knew that he wasn’t the kind of person that would try to take advantage of Sabine. Plus, Ezra was getting tired of always fighting a losing battle.

Still, he hated the image in his head of Wedge with Sabine. He pictured them cozying up in the cockpit of Wedge’s starfighter. Playfully sharing a meal in the mess hall. Sabine pulling on Wedge’s arm and leading him into her room…

In Ezra’s mind, Wedge had already won.

Zeb sighed as he stood up from his bunk. “Look, Ezra. I’m not saying that Sabine is definitely going to come around some day. And if you’re really planning on giving up chasing her, I won’t try to convince you otherwise.” Then, Zeb placed a large purple hand on Ezra’s shoulder. Ezra looked up and met the Lasat’s determined gaze.

“But if you’re gonna go down, you need to go down fighting. Take down that Wedge kid! Not for Sabine. But for you!”

Ezra smiled. He was glad to have Zeb around to make sure he never gave up too easily. Maybe he didn’t have a chance with Sabine, but he wasn’t going to just _give_ her away either.

“Now come, on kid! Think like a rebel!” Zeb punched Ezra’s shoulder - a bit too hard as usual.

Rubbing his sore arm, Ezra looked down in thought. “Right, think like a rebel.”

Zeb spread his hands, his eyes alight with excitement. “Your ally has been captured by your good-looking enemy.”

_Still with the ‘good-looking’?_

Zeb continued. “You need to destroy your enemy without compromising your captured ally. And you need to do it in a way so that no one knows it’s you! What do you do?”

Ezra looked up at Zeb, a smile forming on his lips. “Sabotage.”

Zeb cackled evilly. “I like the way you think, kid. So, how do we sabotage Wedge?”

“We could sneak into his room and steal the lyrics! Change them so he says something really dumb!” Ezra quickly realized that wouldn’t work. “No, we’ve already ruled out sneaking into his room. And he’ll have the lyrics right in front of him.”

“He may even have them memorized by now,” Zeb added.

“We could fake an emergency announcement! Like, ‘Imperial fighters incoming!’”

Zeb frowned at this. Ezra had briefly forgotten he was talking to the base’s head of security.

“Right, no. That’s in bad taste.” If he got the entire base to scramble under false pretenses and was caught for it, Ezra would probably end up in a cell.

Just then, there was a metallic knock at the door. Zeb stepped past Ezra in annoyance. Ezra was pleasantly surprised at how invested Zeb was in all this.

The door slid open, and standing at the doorway was Chopper. The astromech made a series of beeps and grunts, pointing his grabber arms at Zeb in accusing gestures.

“Ugh, Ezra, what’s he saying?” Zeb groaned, backing up and allowing Chopper to roll into the room.

“He says that he and AP-5 were assigned to inspect all the security cameras, but they can’t access the system without your clearance code,” Ezra explained.

Chief of Security Zeb sighed. “Look, Chopper, Ezra and I are a little busy, so why don’t you two just do something like take inventory of grains of sand and I’ll come get you into the system later?”

Chopper growled indignantly. He then made increasingly threatening gestures at Zeb as he continued with more beeps and grunts.

“I said, not now, Chopper! Beat it!” Zeb kicked the droid hard toward the door. Chopper censured Zeb with another slew of grunts that was riddled with expletives and starting rolling toward the door.

Ezra’s eyes suddenly snapped up in realization. “Wait, Chopper! Don’t go just yet!” Chopper stopped short, then turned and rolled toward Ezra, grunting in annoyance. Ezra turned to Zeb. “Will there be any electronic equipment at the gathering tonight?”

Zeb turned to Ezra, narrowing his eyes in thought. “Not much. Just a simple rig for the music. I think it’s actually an older speaker system that used to be hooked up to the base itself. We got a new one a while ago, so I guess the old one is being used for leisure activities.” Zeb cocked an eyebrow. “Why?”

Ezra kneeled down beside Chopper, placing a hand on Chopper’s dome and looking into his optic sensors. “Chopper, were you able to interface with the old speaker system?”

Chopper bounced side to side as he explained that he could interface with anything.

“Tell you what, Chopper. You do me a little favor, and Zeb and I will take care of checking the cameras.”

Chopper gave a suspicious beep, but Ezra could tell that he had the droid’s attention.

“And why would you and I do that?” Zeb asked, sounding intrigued himself.

Ezra looked back up at Zeb, a wicked grin on his face. “Zeb, I have an idea.”

...

Sabine finished checking her makeup in her mirror. She never wore a great deal of it, but just enough to make her feel like less of a blank canvas.

Ok. What was her plan? She wondered, touching up her eyeliner.

Did she need a plan?

Well for one, she wasn’t going to make out with anyone. Right? She was only going this because she got annoyed at Ezra and she thought she might have some fun.

Now she had to figure out what to say to Wedge. Going with him didn’t mean they were dating. She wouldn’t have to worry about him trying to hold her hand or kiss her, right?

Sella’s words came back and she glared at herself in the mirror. Why was she so afraid of getting into a relationship anyway?

Afraid?

She was Mandalorian, she could face down an entire squadron of stormtroopers, she could fly into space battles, she could fight the Empire, and she _wasn’t afraid_!

Why should she be afraid of a boy? No, not of him. Why should she be afraid that a boy wanted to care for her? To have her as his own?

“Why not?” she said out loud as she stared herself down.

“Why not what?” a familiar voice broke her focus.

Sabine turned to see Hera in her doorway and launched into frantic questions. “Why shouldn’t I have a boyfriend? Why shouldn’t I go out with Wedge and let him kiss me tonight? I could have some fun, couldn’t I?”

Hera’s bright green eyes widened. “Woah, woah. What?” Hera entered her room and shut the door behind her, slipping into the seat across from her. “What’s this about Wedge?”

Sabine threw her eyeliner down on the table in frustration. “Wedge asked me to go with him to the gathering tonight, and then Sella told me that I should give him a chance because what if he’s the best thing I’ll ever have, but I don’t think I even need a boyfriend, but at the same time I kinda wanna know what it’s like, but then I think about Ezra and I can’t cross that bridge without burning the way back, but I mean he’s really, really been getting to me lately and I don’t mind him so much anymore, but Wedge is a good guy and obviously I could-”

“Sabine.” Hera had to interrupt her spewing of information. “Take a breath.”

Sabine breathed in slowly and released it.

“Good.” Hera looked at her seriously “Now tell me if I got this right. You’re going on a date with Wedge tonight and you’re not sure if you want to start a relationship with him?”

Sabine nodded.

“And you keep thinking about Ezra but you feel like being with him would ruin the friendship you have now?”

Sabine was instantly grateful to have Hera near. She understood her so perfectly. Even if her advice did annoy her in the past, she was happy to have it now.

“Yes.” She said simply, rearranging her makeup on the table.

Hera smiled warmly and placed her hand over Sabine’s, ceasing its movement. “It’s ok Sabine. You don’t have to do anything you don’t feel completely comfortable with.” Hera’s motherly advice was much needed. “If you don’t want a boyfriend don’t have one. If you think you want to keep your relationship with Ezra where it is then that’s fine. You do whatever you need to do.”

“But Hera, what do I want to do?” She hoped that the woman before her could give her the answer.

Shaking her head she patted Sabine’s hand “I can’t tell you that. Only you can tell you that.” Sabine looked away crestfallen. “I’ll tell you what.” Hera shifted in the seat “Tell me all the pros and cons of the situation and we’ll narrow down what you think.”

“Ok.” She took a deep breath. “Pros…” she took a moment to think. “I think Wedge is a good guy.” She paused again.

“Is that all?” Hera goaded.

“He’s a good friend and he’s kinda cute. We have things in common. I wouldn’t mind having a boyfriend.” She shrugged.

“Have a boyfriend or have him as a boyfriend?” Hera scrutinized. “You don’t need to rush into anything and certainly don’t do anything just because. If I had done stuff with Kanan just because I wanted to and we didn’t build that bond between us first, I don’t think I’d have kept him around.”

Sabine looked at her in surprise. Maybe she had a point. “Now.” Hera continued “I think you have a great bond with Ezra right now, but I know exactly how nerve-wracking it is to take a platonic relationship and push it over the edge. It was the right time for Kanan and I to change our physical relationship when we did, but you need to know that if that decision is made for selfish reasons at the wrong time…” she frowned “I just don’t want to see either of you hurt.”

“And that’s what scares me Hera.” She admitted to herself and her Twi’lek captain. “I feel like at least with Wedge I won’t have to worry about it. I’ll see him a lot on base yes, but he doesn’t live across the hall from me.”

Hera chuckled “I know. Be careful though not to jump into something because of outside pressure.”

She nodded “Yeah. I’ll remember.”

“Are there any cons to going out with Wedge?” Hera asked.

“Well, I don’t really know him that well, but I guess that would change. I don’t think I like him quite that much. He hangs out with those annoying guys. And he doesn’t live across the hall from me.” She grinned at the last one, and Hera laughed.

“Well then.” She removed her hand from Sabine’s “You’re still young Sabine and we don’t know how long this war will last. So be aware of your feelings and be yourself, ok?”

Sabine nodded “Thanks Hera.” She went back to looking in her mirror and Hera stood “Have fun tonight.”

“You too.” she mumbled in a sing song voice.

“What was that?” Hera asked smiling. She had obviously heard her. “Maybe I should assign you to cleaning duty for a week.”

Sabine laughed “If you do I’ll paint your room.”

Hera made her way to the door “See you tomorrow.”

…

Sabine made her way down the ramp of the Ghost.

“Hey.” Wedge was there waiting for her.

“Hi.” She smiled. Her thoughts going a million light years a second. Did she like him enough for this?

They made their way down to the lower levels of the coral that the base was built into. A group of rebels were in a circle, gathered around a few of the larger heating units available. It tended to get a bit chilly in the open night air. The heating units gave off an orange glow, illuminating the immediate area.

The heating units and some of the old speakers from the base were hooked to a power generator nearby. The speakers were off to one side of the circle and crates made up the rest of it, providing sitting places for the spectators.

Some of the young rebels were milling around socializing or saving seats for friends. Some of them were already sitting in the laps of their lovers and a few weren’t exactly shy with PDA.

“Where do you want to sit?” Wedge asked beside her.

She looked around at the seating and strategically chose a place far away from the PDA couples.

Sitting down next to her he smiled “Are you excited? Max and Sella are so good.”

She had to agree “Yeah, I hope they record their stuff and become famous when this is all over. Then I can say I knew them before they were celebrities.” She smiled watching Max fiddle with a stringed instrument and Sella leaning against his shoulder.

Others milled around with different little instruments and some had brought blankets out from their bunks to cuddle in.

“Are you warm enough?” Wedge asked.

“Yeah. I’m fine.” She smiled at him and applauded herself at nabbing a seat by a heating unit.

“So uh, earlier today Ezra said that you were a lone wolf type.” Wedge commented. Why was he bringing this up? “I can kind of see what he was talking about.” He dug the heel of his boot into the coral surface. “I just hope that doesn’t mean all the time. I enjoy spending time with you.” He smiled at her and she turned the corners of her lips upwards looking away.

“Thanks Wedge. I guess I’ve just always been a bit independent.” She watched others readying a few small instruments and warming up off to the side. “I think that’s what Ezra meant.”

“Well if he thinks you always want to be alone that probably means you don’t hang out with him much, right?” The question part seemed like an afterthought.

“Well…” She had to think “Actually, I do spend a lot of time with him, but mostly for our missions. I just spend a lot of time in my room working on my art so he thinks I hate people. And I constantly tell him to go away, so…”

Wedge laughed softly and tapped his knee to hers “So when do I get to see more of your work?”

She shrugged “I’ve been trying to convince Sato to let me put up a mural on base.”

“That would be awesome!” he smiled. “I think your paint job on the shuttle you guys have is pretty cool too. Do you have any recent work I could come see?”

She thought for a moment, but before she could answer, a speaker enhanced voice called their attention.

“Hello, welcome to tonight’s gathering.” Max had always taken the lead when the events were focused on music. “Let’s get started with the music.”

There was singing and dancing and overall fun around the group as music was played. Some people sang along to familiar tunes and most just sat around and enjoyed. Small groups would bunch together and keep up conversations and others would flit from group to group. Sabine caught sight of Ezra across the circle. He was engaged in conversation with another rebel boy. She also caught sight of two girls a few spaces away from him, giggling and glancing furtively in his direction, obviously whispering little secrets to each other, all to do with him.

She folded her arms and looked away, annoyed by their twittering. Maybe Sella had been right about Ezra being popular with the girls here.

After a few songs and performances Max and Sella stood alone, Max holding his instrument and both wearing headset microphones. “Ok guys.” Max started “Before we play our new song we’ll play our most requested this evening.”

Cheers and clapping echoed around the group.

With a little intro music from Max, Sella started out with singing. They were soon harmonizing and blending their voices in a tender song about love and how it felt to be together. Sabine found her gaze gravitating back across the circle to Ezra.

The words of the song caused her to inventory her feelings for him again. She looked back to the performers not wanting to seem like she was staring.

Her eyes however, seemed to have a mind of their own as they slid oyer to Ezra’s face. Her heart beat a steady pounding gate and she turned away once more.

As she watched Sella and Max stare at each other longingly while singing their love confessions, her thoughts were drawn back to the boy across the group from her.

Turning her gaze to him again she was shocked to find him already looking at her. Their eyes met and held. Drunken butterflies tumbled in her stomach and beat against her ribcage in an ever increasing pattern. He had that earnest sultry look in his eyes. The one that caused her cheeks to heat up and her fingers to go numb. Her whole body felt charged with electricity.

She stared into his eyes, and found herself thinking that he should just get up, march right over, and kiss her in front of everyone.

Or maybe she should go to him.

A sudden touch at her back broke the spell over her. Flinching and looking around she realized it was Wedge’s hand drifting across her back.

“Sorry if I startled you.” He smiled at her. “Just want to make sure you’re warm.”

She nodded and felt his hand continue to rub at her back until it eventually found a way to her shoulder. He’d just placed his arm around her.

Smooth move. She had to admit he was good. She decided this would be good for her. If she had many more moments like that with Ezra she’d end up doing something foolish.

She thought back to Hera’s advice and how Wedge’s arm felt around her shoulders. It didn’t feel wrong, but it didn’t feel like magic either. Maybe she just wasn’t ready for anything.

“And now for our brand new song!” Sella’s voice cut through her thoughts.

Clapping and cheers resounded before Max started singing and playing again. They sang at the same time, singing two different melodies that mixed and blended, eventually became one chorus. She couldn’t look back to where Ezra was. She focused instead on the pilot holding her. Looking up at him she wondered if he could inspire the same feelings in her that Ezra did.

Wedge turned to her and met her gaze. She tried to hold longer, but after three seconds she looked away. Was she nervous? Was it not going to work between them?

Max and Sella’s song ended and she clapped for them. Wedge took his arm off her shoulders and clapped as well.

“Now we have a special performance,” Sella smiled, looking around the group mischievously. “Give it up for Wedge Antilles!” Sella cheered and waved him up.

“Wait, you didn’t say you were singing.” Sabine didn’t even know he could sing.

“Yep.” He winked “Save my seat.”

She smiled and nodded watching as he took one of the headset mics from Max.

The couple sat behind him and Sella picked up her own instrument. They started into the song and Wedge was looking right at her.

…

_Here we go._

From where he was seated with a group of rebels, Ezra looked over at the speaker system, just in time to see Chopper rolling into position. Ezra smiled inwardly as Chopper’s domed head swiveled in his direction, as if to say, ‘ready when you are.’

Honestly, Ezra had actually considered giving up on the plan when he saw Sabine looking at him. It was a strange, almost dream-like stare. He was certain that she had never looked at him like that before. For a moment, he felt like maybe there really _could_ be something between the two of them. And maybe he didn’t have to worry about Wedge after all.

But that thought shattered like glass as soon as he saw that pretty-boy, hotshot pilot snake his arm around her. Almost in an instant, the hopes he had with her were dashed to pieces. But before he allowed them to fall in love, get married, and have lots of kids, he decided he wouldn’t be able to forgive himself if he didn’t make Wedge look _really_ bad in front of her at least once.

The crowd cheered and applauded as Wedge took his place in front of them all. Max handed Wedge a headset mic, then took his place behind Wedge with Sella, their instruments at the ready. Wedge’s popularity had to be the worst thing about that guy.

Of course, Ezra wouldn’t even care how popular Wedge was if Sabine wasn’t into him.

Wedge smiled as the cheering died down. Max and Sella started into the tune, a steady, soulful beat. Still in the opening of the song, Wedge addressed the audience. “This is a song I wrote for a special someone out there.”

Ezra rolled his eyes when he heard several girls scream in response.

“It’s called, ‘Painter of my Heart.’” Wedge closed his eyes, swaying his hips and bobbing his head to the music as it grew louder and louder. Ezra was probably the only one who thought he looked ridiculous.

Of course, that was about to change _very_ soon.

Ezra looked over at Chopper. The droid was now fidgeting with anticipation. It wasn’t at all surprising that Chopper was just as eager to publicly humiliate someone as much as Ezra was.

Ezra nodded, and mouthed the command to Chopper. “Do it.”

One of the compartments in Chopper’s chassis flipped open, and a computer probe protruded out of it. Chopper moved in toward the central controls on the system. As Ezra had hoped, everyone was too focused on Wedge to even notice. Ezra couldn’t hear it over the music, but from the way Chopper was rocking side to side, he could tell the droid was laughing in that devilish, electronic grunt as Chopper rotated the computer probe.

Ezra grinned wickedly as he turned his eyes back to Wedge and the band. _Moment of truth._

_My heart is a canvas, and baby, it needs some color._

_I need to feel your brush on me, cause there could be no other._

Ezra clamped a hand over his mouth to resist laughing out loud. Chopper had executed the plan perfectly! While the sound produced by the instruments sounded exactly like Max and Sella had played them before, the words spoken by Wedge came out of the speakers at a _very_ high pitched frequency. He sounded like a jawa that had learned to speak basic!

Ezra looked around gleefully. The smiles on all the people listening had suddenly turned to looks of deep confusion. They all turned their heads to each other, whispering.

“Does he always sound like that?”

“I heard he actually had a really good voice.”

“ _That’s_ what you call a really good voice?”

Ezra looked back at the band. Max and Sella exchanged glances, but they kept playing. Wedge launched into the next lines of the song. Apparently, with the instruments playing right next to him, and the speakers turned away from him, he couldn’t even hear how his own voice sounded.

_I’ve felt your love, and I need some more_

_So come on, what are you waiting for?_

_Just fill my life with incredible art!_

_You’re the Painter - Painter of my Heart!_

By the end of the verse, Ezra could barely even hear the music, because the audience was now roaring with laughter. Rebels all around him rolled onto their sides, clutching their stomachs as they gasped for breath. Even the girls that seemed to admire Wedge so much were unable to suppress their mirth. By now, Max and Sella were looking right at each other, their eyes narrowed with panic.

Wedge finally opened his eyes again, and was now able to see an entire crowd of people laughing. He looked confused, and just as the music’s volume lowered into a transition, he opened his mouth again. “What’s so funny?”

Wedge’s eyes suddenly widened with horror when he heard his voice through the speaker system. “What the? Why do I sound like that? What’s going on?” He spun around at Max and Sella, who shrugged nervously, as if to say, ‘don’t look at us!’

Ezra thought the audience couldn’t laugh any harder, but they proved him wrong. People’s faces were red as they wiped tears out of their eyes. Even Hobbie and Wedge’s other pilot friends were laughing uncontrollably.

“Your best performance yet, buddy!” Hobbie called out to Wedge when he was able to catch his breath.

Wedge’s eyes darted around as he tried to figure out what was going on. He tried desperately to pull the headset mic off his ear, but he seemed to be having some trouble. “Max! Help! Get this thing off me! Hurry!” he pleaded in his whiny, high-pitched voice.

Max put down his instrument and went over to Wedge. The two of them stumbled around comically as they tried to remove the mic from Wedge’s head. A renewed burst of laughter rang out from the audience. From behind them, Sella had placed a hand over her mouth, but she was visibly shaking with laughter.

Max finally managed to get the mic off of Wedge. Wedge glared at Max angrily, while Max held up his hands in defense. Ezra couldn’t hear what they were saying, but Wedge was definitely demanding an explanation. And of course, Max had none to offer.

Just then, Max whirled around toward the speaker system. It looks like he had figured it out. He pointed over to Chopper, who had been gleefully rocking back and forth. But when Chopper realized that Max was pointing at him, Chopper turned around and make a break for it on his wheeled legs.

 _And that’s my cue to exit,_ Ezra thought to himself. Having completed his mission, he got up and discreetly made his way back to the _Ghost_ , leaving the sweet, satisfying sound of derisive laughter behind him.

…

The song had started alright, but Wedge’s voice was so…

Sabine plastered on her poker face and glanced around the group. People had started laughing and she had to let out a few snickers herself before the culprit behind the sabotage was revealed.

She caught sight of a familiar orange topped droid and stood swiftly. She ran to where Wedge, Max, and Sella were about to give chase to the devilish astromech. “No, you stay here!” She placed a hand on Wedge’s shoulder. “I’ll get him.”

“Chopper stop!” Sabine chased after the droid wishing she had her jetpack on her. “Chopper!”

Rounding a corner Chopper stopped suddenly and she had to avoid falling over him. The squat orange and white droid flailed and insistently chittered at her.

“What do you mean he made you do it? Who, Chop?” She waited for the answer but as soon as Chopper launched into his grumpy musings she connected the dots. “It was Ezra wasn’t it?”

The droid let out a long sputtering growl.

“Oh we’ll see about this.” She stalked away from him hearing his gleeful laughter behind her. Of course Chopper was happy...Ezra was in trouble.

Sneaking back to where she could see the gathering spot without being noticed, she searched for Ezra. Finding him gone, she quickly went back to the Ghost hoping to catch him there.

Walking softly up the ramp and sneaking close to their room, she heard Zeb and Ezra laughing raucously and Zeb congratulating him on his plan’s success.

She moved forward and wiped the smile from her face. Sure she was a little mad, but Ezra had always been a prankster and it had been kind of funny.

Putting on her best scowl she opened their door. Both went stock-still at the sight of her.

“Ezra! A word...now.” she didn’t break from her angry character, even as Zeb chuckled and muttered “Good luck” under his breath.

Ezra reluctantly stepped forward and moved through the doorway. “Yes Sabine?” he smiled sweetly.

“Outside.” She pointed. He flinched at her arm’s movement.

Once they had gotten down the ramp she turned and grabbed a fist full of his jacket, using her arm to push him backwards till he slammed against the tall stack of crates beside the ship.

“Woah! Sabine!” he panicked.

“I know what you did.” She glared at him. “Ezra, how could you?” she backed away from him folding her arms across her chest. “Why did you do that?”

He took a breath, rubbing his chest where her arm had shoved. “What? Can’t I have a little fun? I haven’t done any good pranks lately.” He complained.

Her eyes narrowed “Ezra.” She had a feeling that there was more to this than that.

“Look,” he threw his hands up between them “Chopper hates Wedge, so I said…”

She’d had enough of his lies “Chopper hates everyone, but you’re the one that has a problem with Wedge.” He stayed silent not confirming or denying her statement. “Ezra, I’ve seen you around him and I know how you and Zeb like to torment, but you didn’t need to do this.”

“I didn’t need to do this?” he questioned “I didn’t need to stop him from singing a song he’d written for you and likely impress you so much that you’d want to be with him and not...” he closed his mouth seeming as though he’d said too much already.

“Not what, Ezra?” she pried, still trying to sound angry. “And how did you know he was going to sing and that the song was about me?”

His head bowed. “I followed him on base today and overheard him talking about it.” He admitted looking at the ground. “And I was afraid you’d want to be with him and not me...Sabine...You know that I…” he shook his head unable to form the words.

She knew exactly what he was trying to say and felt the spark in her heart glowing into a steady warmth. “Ezra look at me.” She stepped closer to him as his eyes met hers. “You don’t have to worry about me. I know you like me a lot and I’m fine with that, but you have to let me make my own decisions.”

He nodded “I get it, Sabine.”

She smiled “Good.” Pausing from a slight moment of indecision, she stepped forward again. “But since you put in so much effort into getting my attention…” She rocked up on her feet and swiftly pushed a kiss to his cheek.

Pulling away she smiled up at him. His jaw was slack and he was staring straight ahead.

 _I think I broke him._ She thought with a silent giggle. “You ok there, Ezra?”

A giddy smile formed and his eyes drifted to hers. “Yeah.” He breathed.

“I’m going back to apologize to Wedge.” She told him “You stay here. I don’t need you skulking around watching us, ok?”

He rolled his eyes “Maybe I should just find Chopper and send him back to cause more havoc.”

She laughed “You do and I’ll make sure you get demoted and put on cleaning duty.” She threatened.

“OK, fine.” He groaned “And Sabine.” He reached out and grabbed her hand. “Do you know what your decision is?” She laced her fingers with his. “Me or him?”

She squeezed his hand “Ezra I love your confidence, but I never said I was choosing between you two.” She smiled at his look of confusion and let go of his hand “I’ll let you know though.”

She walked away from him going back to the gathering. She decided in her head that she didn’t need to have a relationship and she was going to tell both Ezra and Wedge that.

But then again, she also knew that eventually she’d make another change in that decision and she might have already decided who she would prefer.

Reaching the area they had been in earlier, she saw that most people had grouped off into their own cliques and it was no longer an organized musical display. Some were still tinkering with instruments and Sabine noticed most couples, including Sella and Max, were gone. She caught sight of Wedge with his usual gang of fellow pilots.

Moving closer he looked up to see her. All eyes in his group were on her now and instead of talking she motioned with a nod for him to follow her.

Hoots and wolf whistles from the pilots made Wedge groan. “Sorry about them.”

Once they were away from prying eyes and ears she turned to him. “Wedge I’m sorry for what Chopper did, I swear he’s such a nuisance sometimes.” She put a sympathetic look on her face. She’d never tell him that it was Ezra’s idea. They already butted heads enough, she didn’t need to start a fight between them.

“It’s ok, Sabine.” He sighed. “I get to give you a private performance now though, right?” he smiled.

She looked away, her mind drifting back to the Ghost and how she wanted to be there rather than here at the moment. “Wedge…”

He reached out a hand to her shoulder. “Sabine. You don’t have to answer right away, but I wrote that song for you because I like you, and I’d like to get to know you more. I was hoping my performance could inspire you to be my girlfriend.” A blush tinted his cheeks.

She studied his strong features and settled her gaze on his cinnamon eyes. “Wedge, I respect you a lot and you’ve become a really good friend, but I don’t think I can-”

She watched his gaze flick to the ground momentarily before he cut her off. “But Sabine, is it me? Is it another guy? Is it Ezra?”

She laughed. “No Wedge. I told you before I’ve always been kind of independent. And I realized that I’m just not ready for any kind of relationship.”

He nodded “Alright.” He squeezed her shoulder gently “Just so you know, I think you’re the prettiest girl on base, you’re talented beyond measure, and when you finally do decide you’re done being alone…” She thought he would offer himself again, but was surprised. “I’m sure you’ll find a guy that will make you happy.”

She smiled. “Thanks, Wedge.”

“Can I sing for you anyway?” He asked timidly.

She laughed. “As long as Chopper’s not here.”

He glanced around “Nope I think we’re good.” They found a secluded spot near the edge of the coral and sat on the ground. He sang his song and she listened, surprised at how good his voice actually was. Definitely a turn on, but not enough to change her mind.

The song was obviously written for her and she was kind of glad that Chopper messed up his performance. She figured at the end he might have asked her publicly to be his and she’d either have to agree, or hurt him even worse. Either way she was happy that she had time to talk to him about it away from people.

“Well.” She said when he’d finished. “I’m impressed. You did a good job on that.”

“You sure you won’t reconsider now that I’ve impressed you?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.

She shook her head smiling “I’m happy with what I have right now. I’m being me and I’m not ready to drag anyone else into my world quite yet.”

He looked up at the night sky above them. “I understand. We’re all at different stages in our lives I guess. So, Sabine Wren.” He stood from the ground, dusting himself off. “Can I walk you back to your ship?” he asked, holding out a hand to her. “Or are you too independent for that?” She caught his playful tone and rolled her eyes.

“I guess I can live with that.” She took the offered hand and was pulled to her feet.

Walking slowly side by side they talked more about their missions and normal topics for two rebels to cover. You wouldn’t even know that she’d turned him down a moment ago.

…

Ezra whistled a tune as he strode through the corridor of the _Ghost,_ a light skip in his step. He looked around at the cold, steel walls and stained floors, and wondered how he ever got so lucky to get to live in such a wonderful place. _Did it always smell so good in here?_ It was like a field of flowers today.

He heard the heavy footsteps of Zeb around the corner. Without even looking at the Lasat, Ezra waved “Hey roomie!” and continued to the kitchen, leaving Zeb with a dumbfounded expression on his face.

“Uh, hey! Wait a minute!” Zeb called as he caught up with Ezra. “She...she didn’t kill you?”

Ezra didn’t answer, continuing to whistle to himself as he poured himself a glass of water. He was too content to care about anything in the galaxy right now.

“Hey. Ezra! Ezra!” Zeb tried to get Ezra’s attention, but it wasn’t working. Ezra was facing away from Zeb, continuing with his whistling.

“EZRA!” Zeb was shouting now.

Ezra turned around. But he didn’t look annoyed. He smiled at the Lasat, a dreamy expression in his eyes. “Yes, Zeb?”

“What. Happened.” Zeb demanded slowly, his hands spread wide.

Ezra downed his glass of water, placed it on the counter, and looked back at Zeb. “Something amazing.”

Zeb cocked an eyebrow at him. “That may be the most unlikely thing you’ve ever said.”

Ezra kneeled against the counter non-chalantly. He turned his head slightly, sticking his cheek out toward Zeb. “Really? Notice anything different about me?”

Zeb blinked in confusion. “Uh…”

Ezra tapped his cheek suggestively.

“Well, you got those scars a while ago, so-“

“She kissed me!” Ezra blurted out, unable to restrain himself any longer. “I honestly thought she was going to slap me, but she didn’t! It was right here! Right on this cheek!” Ezra drew his face close to Zeb, pointing to where she had placed her lips. _And it still feels warm!_

Zeb chuckled and shook his head. “Well, never would’ve seen that one coming. The little lady’s still full of surprises.”

“Do you know what this means?” Ezra asked frantically. “Do you realize what’s going to happen?”

Zeb shrugged slightly. _Why wasn’t he more excited?_ Ezra wondered. _Does he not get how big this is?_

“Well,” Zeb started. “It’s definitely not as bad as it could’ve been. But are you sure you know what you’re talking about?”

“What do you mean? She wouldn’t have kissed me if it didn’t mean she-”

“Ezra, people kiss each other on the cheeks for any number of reason. I once spent a few days on a planet where everyone kissed your cheek every time they said hello! It was a nightmare!”

Ezra felt himself starting to get less enthusiastic. “Yeah, but, she did say it was because she had noticed how hard I was trying to get her attention!”

Zeb groaned and put a hand over his eyes, shaking his head. “Karabast. Ezra, did she say anything else?”

“Well…” Ezra narrowed his brow in thought. He had been so elated from Sabine’s kiss that he could barely even think about anything else. But now that Zeb mentioned it, she had said some other things. But what were they?

 _Start from the beginning,_ Ezra ordered himself. “She had me pinned against the wall...she asked me why I did it...I told her...she told me not to worry and let her make her own decisions.”

Somehow, it all sounded a lot worse when he went over it in his head.

“But then she kissed me!” Ezra perked up again, pointing at Zeb as if countering an argument.

Zeb nodded as he folded his arms. “Okay, but then what?”

 _Then what?_ “Well…” _What happened? What did she say again? Something about...choosing?_

A sudden realization dawned on him. “She said she wasn’t necessarily choosing between the two of us!”

Zeb closed his eyes and hung his head, humming softly in understanding. “I had a feeling.” He looked back up at Ezra. “Ezra, you really don’t understand a kiss between two people who are mates and a kiss between people who aren’t, do you? There are times when it really doesn’t mean anything more than a handshake or even a nod. Hell, some women even give them out as consolation prizes when a guy is feeling bad!” He sighed heavily. “And I don’t know if everyone is like this, but some people like to taste everything on the menu at a new cantina before they settle on a favorite drink. If you catch my meaning.”

 _Consolation prize?_ Ezra thought in horror as his eyes fell to the floor. _Could that be true?_ No, it couldn’t be. Zeb wasn’t there. He didn’t see the way she smiled at him. The way she had looked at him during that song. There was something there! There had to be! It couldn’t have meant nothing! Or was it really like Zeb said? Was she really going to ‘taste everything on the menu?’

“Did Sabine say where she was going?” Zeb asked. “I knew she wanted to take you outside to smack you around a little, but if that’s all it was, she would’ve been back by now, right?

Ezra’s head snapped up. He remembered something else she had said. _She said she was going to talk to Wedge! How could I have forgotten about that! It wasn’t even that long ago!_

“I gotta go.” Breathing fast, Ezra ran past Zeb and headed for the cargo bay door.

_Please don’t let it be true._

…

Reaching the ship Sabine turned to face Wedge. “Well, thanks for tonight. I’m sorry again about Chopper.”

He chuckled “It’s no problem.” He sighed “I’ll get over it eventually. I’ll have to live with my buddies teasing me though, but that’s not anything new.” He rolled his eyes before focusing on her again. “So can I get a hug?”

She nodded and he moved forward, placing his arms around her. It was brief, but when he pulled away he didn’t go far. Placing a hand softly to her cheek he said “I swear I’ll leave you alone after this, but if I could just ask one more favor?”

She grew nervous. “What is it?”

His thumb moved over her bottom lip. “One kiss?” he looked so pleading. “You can say no. I won’t force you.” His thumb passed again over the delicate skin. “I just want to know what it would be like if you had said yes to me.”

She knew that normally she should just push him away, but what was the harm in just one kiss? A final seal on what was never to be. She could do that. At least as an apology for his night being ruined. She nodded lightly and he smiled before leaning in.

Their lips touched softly and he pressed in harder for a moment. It wasn’t her first kiss, and she hoped it wouldn’t be her last, but there was no spark in it to leave her wanting more.

Pulling away he looked down at her. “Huh.” He said distractedly. “Not what I thought it would be like.”

She breathed in an amused huff. “Ha, nothing there?”

He nodded “Wow. It’s like…” he paused.

“Like kissing a sister?” she teased.

He grinned “Well, not quite that bad.”

She laughed and backed away from him. “Well, goodnight Wedge.”

He nodded “See ya around, Sabine.” She watched him retreat back into base and made her way up the ramp of the Ghost.

…

Ezra climbed up the ladder as quickly and silently as he could, then sprinted through the corridor and into his room, pounding a fist into the panel behind him and closing the doors. He stood alone in his dark room, his head hung low.

_How could she?_

Ezra had seen Sabine and Wedge. They were locked in a tender embrace. Wedge had a hand on her face; that face that Ezra adored so much. And they were kissing. With their lips.

He wasn’t sure why his chest was throbbing so hard. It couldn’t be his heart, because he was sure it was broken. Right after the girl he loved had shown him a small measure of affection, she was kissing that cocky pilot in no time at all. Zeb was right. Sabine’s kiss on Ezra’s cheek really didn’t mean much at all.

_How could I have been so stupid?_

Ezra’s fists shook, and his breath was fast. He could start to feel moisture forming in his eyes.

 _No, don’t do this._ He fought the urge to weep out loud. He wouldn’t. He was a Jedi. Jedi didn’t allow themselves to be affected by trivial emotions.

But that was a lie. His feelings for Sabine were anything but trivial. They had given him strength to stay alive, even against insurmountable odds. They kept him awake at night. And when he could manage to sleep, they filled his dreams with images of indescribable happiness.

Now they plagued him like a nightmare. Taunting him with promises of loneliness and misery.

Ezra started to feel weak. He slowly stepped over to his bunk, climbing the ladder and laying down on his mattress, staring at the ceiling.

 _What about that look? The look she had given him during that song at the gathering?_ He thought that it was a look of someone who had feelings for him. He could sense the sincerity in her eyes at that time. But now he realized that wasn’t it at all. That was the moment she was telling him goodbye. That had to have been the moment she realized that Wedge was who she wanted. And she was silently telling him she was sorry.

She had chosen Wedge. A guy they had known for only a short time. Ezra and Sabine had been on the _Ghost_ for years together. They fought and argued, but they never stopped caring for each other. He thought that with enough time, she would notice how much he had grown and matured. And just maybe, she would start to see him in the same way he saw her. But all she needed was another option that was better than him, and she took it as quickly as she could.

It was unbearable.

Just then, Ezra heard the door to the room slide open. He whipped himself around to face the back wall. He could feel hot tears on his face, and he couldn’t bear to let anyone see them.

“Ezra?” the uncommonly gentle voice of Zeb called to him.

Ezra said nothing. He couldn’t speak. He felt like he was almost choking.

“Ezra, are you alright?”

Ezra swallowed, trying to regain some composure. He couldn’t manage very much of it though. “Sabine…and Wedge…” he managed to croak.

Ezra could hear the Lasat sigh softly. He heard Zeb’s footsteps move closer to his bunk. And just then, he felt a large, warm hand on his shoulder, squeezing it firmly, but gently.

“I’m sorry,” was all Zeb said before he turned around and left the room. Ezra wasn’t entirely sure if he wanted to be completely alone right now, but he was grateful for Zeb’s consideration.

But Ezra was sure that even if Zeb did stay in the room, he would feel just as alone as he did now.

…

Sabine moved through the Ghost towards her room.

Passing by Ezra’s door she smiled to herself, the look on his face when she’d kissed his cheek playing through her head.

Climbing into her bed that night she felt good about her decision for the present, and the future. This secret was something she’d hold closer than her armor plates to her chest. She’d realised that she wanted Ezra to be her future.

When she was finally ready, and providing he was still willing, she’d have him by her side.

She knew there was no way she’d sleep tonight on her own will, so she grabbed her helmet and put it on, playing music to distract her from thinking too much.

Eventually she reached a point where she could sleep, but still had a smile on her face.

 

To be continued...

..................

Thank you to all those that read and those that comment! You really do inspire me to write more! If you haven't read my co-author's stuff please go do so! Find it [HERE](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Ciryc_Tal/pseuds/Ciryc_Tal)

Inspiration song for when Ezra and Sabine make googly eyes at each other at the gathering [HERE](https://youtu.be/gVXEMa2nloM)

My inspiration for Max and Sella [HERE](https://youtu.be/7m3o5LuFKxg)

Love you guys!! Part two coming up next!!!

 

 


	13. Choosing Me (Part II)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Follow up to last chapter.

 

Sabine woke in the morning and made her way into the galley. She poured a cup of caf leisurely while humming to herself. Zeb entered the room shortly after and gave her a grumpy look.

“Good morning Zeb.” She smiled.

She usually wasn’t this bubbly in the morning, but last night she had settled her feelings in her mind for Ezra. Finally figuring out what she wanted from him was a win in her books.

“You seem happy.” He grumbled, grabbing food and a cup of caf before sitting at the table.

She slid into the seat in front of him. “Why shouldn’t I be?” she reached forward and snagged some of his breakfast, popping it into her mouth with a cheshire grin.

He usually didn’t mind, but today he looked at her with a growl “I thought I knew you better Sabine.”

She was surprised, but figured he must be playing. “Oh come on Zeb, it’s nothing.”

He stood without words and took his plate and cup with him back into his room.

 _Wow, he must not have slept well at all._ Sabine thought. _And look who else didn’t get much sleep._

“Good morning.” Hera yawned shuffling towards the caf machine. She looked a bit more tired than usual. Kanan joined her a moment later.

“Do we have a mission today?” Sabine asked, ready for action. She felt like she could take on the entire Empire single handed and wreck them to pieces.

Hera rubbed a hand against her neck, dipping inside her collar. Sabine thought she caught a glimpse of a dark patch hidden below, most likely a hickey courtesy of Kanan last night. “I don’t know yet. We had something planned, but command said to hold off for a while till we get other orders.”

“So more time off?” By time off she meant staying on base. There was plenty of work to do here, but they wouldn’t be flying anywhere.

Hera nodded. “Yep. I just wish I knew why.”

Kanan sat down across from Sabine in Zeb’s vacated spot, placing his caf in front of him.

Hera hummed a short clipped note into her cup as she drank. “Oh yeah, how was your date with Wedge?”

Sabine tilted her head “Well…” she regaled the story to them about the mishap with Chopper, but left out details like her kisses that night. “Then I threatened Ezra a bit, apologized to Wedge, and came back here.”

Hera was smiling bemusedly and mumbling about Chopper being a load of trouble.

Sabine noticed however that Kanan didn’t seem as entertained at her story.

Kanan’s mouth was a frown and his closed eyes tightened. “Sabine, did something else happen last night with Ezra?”

Sabine looked at him in confusion. Did he know she’d kissed him? Was there a Jedi awareness that let him know that? Maybe that’s why Jedi didn’t have lovers in the past if their masters could know every detail.

His eyebrows drew together “Are you sure he was alright when you saw him last?”

She grew suspicious and looked up at Hera in question. Hera had a serious look on her face now too and nodded for her to answer.

“Yeah. I might have slammed him into some crates while threatening him, but he seemed perfectly alright.” She shifted in her seat suddenly worried. “Why?”

Kanan’s mouth parted but he didn’t speak. What was so wrong that he’d pause this long before telling her? “I felt him in distress last night.”

Distress? He had probably been worked up by her kiss and overstressed himself. The boy did tend to overthink. “I’m sure he’s fine Kanan.” Sabine sipped her caf not wanting to say more about it. She’d never hear the end of it if she let slip she’d smooched his face.

“I’d better get dressed.” She stood and left, taking her cup with her. Had Ezra gotten so flustered that Kanan sensed it? She laughed to herself and shook her head pulling on her day clothes.

When hooking the last bit of her armor on, and placing her belt on her hips, she vowed to talk to Ezra about it, and explain that he should just calm down for now because she wasn’t going to be in a relationship for a while.

She wouldn’t dare tell him that she wanted it to be him in the far off future. That could wait for when she was ready.

She got assignments from Hera and set to work.

By the time lunch rolled around she was surprised that she hadn’t seen Ezra yet. He usually came and found her to pester her during the day, or they’d run into each other on base. But today she didn’t see him at all.

She ate quickly by herself, not wanting to have to explain to anyone about last night and went back to work. A whole day passed and she hadn’t seen Ezra once. The explanations of her decision to stay single were running around and around in her head, waiting to break out whenever she finally did see him.

She finished her normal tasks and decided to work more on the Phantom. There were still things that she could tweak.

She walked up the ramp of the Ghost later than usual that night and hopped in the shower. She’d have to wait till tomorrow to talk to him, he was probably asleep.

Dressing in her night clothes she went back to her room. Toweling off her hair she caught sight of her caf cup from that morning. Sighing  in annoyance at her own forgetfulness she picked it up and returned it to the kitchen. Upon entering she was surprised to see Ezra sitting down, his head in his arms on the table.

The ship’s lighting was on night cycle, but there was enough light to see his back rising and falling in rhythm. She smiled at him fondly. Was he asleep?

Carefully placing her cup in the sink she snuck over to him. “Hey Ezra.” She whispered.

His head shot up and he slid away from her like she was a poisonous creature ready to attack.

“Did I scare you?” she grinned, going back to cleaning out her caf cup. “I’m glad you’re still awake. I wanted to talk to you about something, but I couldn’t find you earlier. I just got back and I thought you’d be asleep, but since you’re not, I guess we can talk now.”

She finished cleaning and turned around to face him, but there was no Ezra in sight.

Weird.

She returned to her room and curled up in bed. She’d just have to talk to him in the morning.

She waited for him at breakfast, but he never came out of his room. Zeb seemed just as grumpy today too. Had something happened to cause a fight between the two? This is how they usually acted when that happened.

She finally got fed up of not seeing him and approached Zeb in the afternoon. “Hey Zeb, have you seen Ezra?” she asked watching him work.

“No.” The answer was clipped and gruff. He seemed to still be in a bad mood and unwilling to talk, so she decided it was better to leave him be.

Finding Kanan, she asked him instead. “Hey Kanan, do you know where Ezra is?”

The Jedi turned towards her and frowned. “Let me take you to him.”

What did that mean? She followed him and climbed on the back of his speeder bike as they took off into the vast barren wilderness surrounding the base. He stopped at the edge of a ridge and she got off the bike.

“He’s down there somewhere.” Kanan motioned. “He’s in pain Sabine. See if you can help him. He won’t talk to me about it, maybe you can drag it out of him.”

Now she was worried. Ezra was in pain and wouldn’t even talk to Kanan?

“Do you want me to wait for you?” he offered. He really was like a dad.

“No, I’ll be fine.” she patted his shoulder and watched him leave before descending into the gorge. She kept her hands on her pistols in case spiders showed up, but none seemed to be out here.

She walked around for a while before she saw a familiar green glow. Ezra was working on his lightsaber forms, stripped down to just his pants. Her breath caught in her throat at the sight of his tan skin.

“Ezra?” she approached cautiously. She didn’t want to startle him while he held the Jedi blade in his hands.

Turning toward her he abruptly shut down the lightsaber and hooked it to his belt. He didn’t look at her as he crossed to his clothing on the seat of the speeder bike he’d come on. Pulling on his shirt he remained silent and didn’t even acknowledge her.

“Ezra what’s wrong?” she asked drawing closer to him.

He slid on his outer layer, but didn’t fasten it up. “Nothing.” his voice was quiet and he grabbed his socks and boots, flopping down on the ground to put them on.

“It doesn’t seem like nothing to me.” she approached, crouching down next to him.

“Will you just leave me alone please?” he sounded desperate and wouldn’t look her in the eye.

“Why Ezra? What happened?” She was worried. What was going on? Hadn’t he recovered from the darkness? Wasn’t he happy the night before last? What had happened to put him in this state?

His voice came out harshly. “You always tell me to leave you alone so why can’t you take your own advice?!”

Oh so he was spitting attitude at her now. Well, she could spit back just as much.

“Oh I’d be happy to leave you alone, except you’ve been worrying everyone and I came to find out what is wrong with you!” she snapped, suddenly feeling bad at the way he withdrew from her further. “Ezra I’m sorry for yelling.” she sighed “Look, if you don’t want to talk now that’s fine, but I’ve got a shipment to inventory, so if you want to help, maybe we can talk while we count stuff.”

He turned toward her at last, a frustrated look on his face and if she wasn’t hallucinating, moisture gathering in his eyes. “Why don’t you ask your boyfriend to help?”

Now she was really confused. “What?”

“Don’t play dumb!” he hissed angrily “I saw you with him!” he took a sharp breath in “I saw you kissing him right after you’d kissed me.” his voice shook.

Her heart sank into her stomach and caused it to churn. He wasn’t supposed to have known.

“Ezra...” she started to explain, but he stood up quickly, his fists balled at his side.

“You were kissing him! You kissed my cheek and I... I don’t know how I could’ve been so stupid!” His voice was harsh and raspy. “I can’t believe that for all these years I’ve grown closer to you and trusted you with my heart and then you lead me to think that maybe I stand a chance…” He gulped air and his voice broke. “You kissed my cheek, held my hand, and the way you looked at me during that song Max and Sella sang I thought...” he pushed his fists against his eyes “And then you go off with him! You played my feelings and then got what you really wanted from him. You came home late last night, I can only assume what you were doing with him was amazing for you. Were you planning on keeping me around to play with as well?”

She was in shock.

Removing his hands from his face he looked at her again. She saw his expression soften and his jaw slack.

She was confused at first at the sudden change in demeanor, but then felt the tears coursing down her cheeks.

“Ezra.” she couldn’t speak, her throat was too tight. Why was she crying? This wasn’t like her. She should be yelling at him and telling him how stupid he was, but for some reason her heart broke with his and she could only cry.

He took a small step towards her, but stopped. She swallowed and took a deep breath, trying to clear the way for words to come forth.

“Ezra, I told him that I wasn’t ready for a relationship at all. With anyone.” she hiccuped “He asked for one kiss and I felt sorry for what had happened so I gave it to him.” she watched pain go across his face. “I’m not his Ezra, I’ll never be his. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I’m so sorry Ezra.” she finished with gasping breaths and held her arms tight around her middle. How could her body feel so much pain from just emotion?

He looked away and closed his eyes tightly.

She managed to wrestle her feelings down enough so she could speak again “Ezra I kissed him, but it didn’t mean anything. I won’t kiss your lips because it would mean something to you.” his eyes snapped back to hers. “I can’t kiss you because I know how much you like me and I won’t hurt you Ezra.” She waited, but he still didn’t speak. “I don’t kiss you because I want you to have kisses that mean something.” she hiccuped again, choking on her own voice.

She moved forward towards him, half expecting him to jump on the speeder bike and flee. She got close enough to touch him and reached out, grabbing onto the still open jacket. “Ezra, please say something.”

More tears fell from her eyes and she saw his own cheeks were wet as well. “I’m an idiot.” he mumbled.

She looked at him in surprise.

He started chuckling half heartedly. “I thought…” he chuckled again and turned fully towards her. “Oh Sabine I’m an idiot!”

He pulled her against him and pressed his face to her lilac hair. She closed her eyes and felt his heartbeat thudding against her hand. Her breathing slowly calmed to normal and aligned with his.

He buried his head closer to her, whispering in her ear “Can we be friends again?”

She breathily laughed and sniffled “I thought we were.”

He released her and slid off his jacket, bringing it up he wiped away the liquid on her face. “Ezra stop, you’re gonna get snot all over your jacket.” she laughed as he wiped her face again.

“I can wash it.” he smiled and tied it around his waist before pulling her close again.

“Can we forget that I’m an idiot?” he asked, rubbing circles on her back.

“I don’t know. Can we?” she teased and stepped away from him. “Only if we wait a while before going back to base. I probably look like a monster from crying so hard.”

“A cute monster.” he flirted and she rolled her eyes.

She sat down and then laid on the dry earth below her. He moved to her side and laid down next to her. “It’s awkward to hug you with your armor on.”

She laughed and nudged him with her elbow. They stayed side by side staring up at the Atollon sky for quite some time, just enjoying each other’s presence.

“So you told him you don’t want a relationship at all right now?” he asked, finally breaking the silence.

She let out a long breath “Yes, I don’t want anything right now. I want to focus on being me and working on this rebellion.”

He was quiet for a bit more. “You sound like Hera.”

It was true, she realized. They had caught the captain off guard one day and interrogated her about when she and Kanan would ever get married. Hera had made it very clear that her first priority was the rebellion. Did that stop her from nipping into Kanan’s bunk or pulling him into her room every now and then? No, but Sabine knew the same arrangement might not be good for herself.

“Yeah, I know.” she confirmed. “But don’t get any ideas about being my Kanan. I’m not getting involved with anyone until I want to. Especially not you.”

“Wha...What do you mean especially not me?” he asked softly, sounding a bit worried.

“I mean you live across the hall from me and I value your friendship too much right now to even dream of sneaking around with you.” she should stop talking. He might get ideas.

“But...if you did want to... that would mean you’d like me right?” He asked hesitantly. She turned to look at him and saw the blush on his cheeks.

She wanted to kick herself. “Don’t get any ideas about me Ezra Bridger.” she said firmly. “I’m not that easily won.”

When he didn’t reply she glanced back to him, only to find a huge grin on his face.

“And what are you smiling at?” she asked sitting up.

He sat up with her. “Nothing.” Standing, he held out his hand and pulled her to her feet. “We should get back to base.”

She nodded and turned as a sudden skittering noise nearby drew her attention. Several krykna had moved in on their location.

“Ezra!” Sabine gasped reaching for her pistols.

“No!” his hands covered hers before she could draw her weapons. Must be his Jedi reflexes again, because she wasn’t a slow draw. “Don’t shoot them.” he held on to her hands and she backed against him, moving away from the nearest approaching behemoth of a spider.

“Ezra they’re getting closer!” she tried to pull her guns free, but his fingers pried her grip from them and tugged her hands away from the weapons.

“It’s ok Sabine, just be calm and they won’t hurt you.” he said holding onto her fists to keep her from attacking.

“What!?” she breathed in panic. What was he saying?

“Kanan taught me this, you have to trust me. Be calm.” he ordered.

She tried to relax, but how does one relax with giant man eating creatures closing in?

“Focus on me.” he said in her ear. “Close your eyes. Trust me.”

If ever there was a time she wanted to kill a Jedi, now was it. Maybe her people had been right to contend against them. He was obviously insane. But then again, he and Kanan had come out here a lot and not been eaten, so maybe he was right.

Pushing aside her fears she tried his advice and closed her eyes. She focused on him and calming down. Her back was pressed against his front, his hands gripping her fists holding them tightly to his thighs to keep her from shooting at stuff.

 _Breathe_ she commanded herself. Taking steady breaths and matching the rise and fall of his chest against her back she started to calm down.

“Good, it’s working!” he whispered in her ear causing her eyes to open for a moment to check.

The beasts had stopped moving towards them, but still remained. She closed her eyes again and focused on him. The way his body pressed against hers. She knew exactly what she could do to excite him in this position, with just an arch of her back and a movement of her hands.

But no…

She had promised herself that she wouldn’t tempt him or start anything between them till she was ready. Besides, now was hardly the time. She tried to steady herself, but runaway thoughts of him or of impending spider attacks would shake her up again.

Then, out of nowhere, she felt a wave of calm suddenly fill her, and relaxed as she waited for his voice again. The calm seemed so foreign to her, as though it came from outside of her. Almost like...

She leaned against him more, her fists loosening, her palms flattening on his legs. She didn’t know how long they stayed like that, but feeling him so close became a source of comfort.

“I’m letting go now.” he warned, before releasing her. His hands left hers and he stepped back. She opened her eyes to see the krykna had retreated, and were nowhere in sight.

She turned to face him. “Why did they leave?”

He shrugged. “Kanan said they only attack when you’re a threat to them. They came to investigate us and when they saw we were calm they left.”

She shook her head in disbelief. Jedi were strange. How did Kanan even figure that out in the first place? She imagined for a moment the blind Jedi walking through the spiders and patting their bulbous bodies like pets, talking to them in a jovial manner.

She refocused on the recent experience and found she was still wary about something. “Hey Ezra?”

He had gone back to the speeder bike. “Yeah?”

She moved closer unsure of how to phrase her question. “That feeling of calm…” how could she say it best? “Was that...you?” His Jedi powers were still a mystery to her.

He chuckled nervously “I may have sent some through the Force to you.” he looked at her guiltily. “But I only did it because you weren’t relaxing.”

She moved to stand beside him “Well it worked. Thanks.”

“I thought you’d be mad.” he admitted passing a hand over the bike seat.

Her shoulders bobbed “Normally I wouldn’t feel comfortable with you playing around in my emotions, but hey, it got them to back off so I guess I can let it slide this time.”

“Good.” he smiled mounting the bike.

Another thought hit her. “Oh yeah!” she punched his arm hard.

He winced “Ow! What-”

“That’s for thinking I was out late with Wedge when I was fixing up the Phantom last night. Keep your nasty opinions of me out of your head.”

He grimaced “I said I was an idiot.”

She climbed on the bike behind him, putting her hands on his waist. “And I already knew you were, so let’s get back to base and no more will be said.” she teased.

He laughed and rubbed his arm. “I’ll have a bruise there.”

“Good, then maybe you’ll remember not to be an idiot.” she grinned “Now, are you going to drive us back or do I have to switch places with you?”

He fired up the bike and sped away from the secluded desert canyon.

Sabine smiled to herself at how ridiculous these past few days had been. But at least now they were over and she had her Ezra back. She felt her stomach flip at the thought that her future was literally right in front of her. She held back her desire to lean forward and press her cheek to his back. She'd have plenty of time to cuddle with him after the Empire had fallen and they were free.

.....

 

Ezra's pov [HERE](http://archiveofourown.org/works/9306710/chapters/21294593)

 Kanera version [HERE](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8101927/chapters/21310463)

 

 

 


	14. Ketsu.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rewind!! Ketsu ships it. Set during season 2 episode 8.

 

“So your rebel crew treats you well then?” Ketsu asked as they made their way to rendezvous with Senator Organa’s contact. They had escaped the Empire and Sabine had convinced Ketsu to help her complete the mission. 

“Yeah.” Sabine replied “They look out for me.” Sabine was glad to have her friend back on her side and wondered if she could convince her to join their cause.

“Who was the kid you were with? Another rebel?” Ketsu glanced at her from the corner of her eye.

Sabine nodded. “That’s Ezra. He’s part of the crew.” Sabine confirmed as she combed her azure locks behind her ear.

“Is your whole crew kids?” Ketsu snorted.

“No, and I’m not a kid!” Sabine snapped. Ketsu had always done this to her. Even though she wasn’t that much older herself.

Ketsu smirked “Not so grown up either.”

Sabine decided it wasn’t worth arguing. “Our crew is like a family. Kanan is in charge and Hera is our pilot, and she takes care of all of us. Zeb looks out for me too, like an older brother, and Ezra…well... Ezra is Ezra.”

“What does that mean?” the bounty hunter questioned eyeing her friend again.

“He’s an interesting boy. We picked him up on Lothal trying to steal from us, but now he’s part of the Rebellion.” Sabine shifted in her chair. “You could be too if you wanted.” Hopefully Ketsu would see that they could work together again and bring down the Empire they both hated.

“Do you like him?” Ketsu persisted. She was never one to beat around the bush.

“Like him? You mean as a person?” Sabine played dumb, hoping Ketsu would get the hint to drop the subject. “When we get back to my ship, you should totally join us Ketsu.” 

“You know what I mean. Don’t change the subject.” She pushed “He defended you pretty well back at the spaceport.” Sabine could feel Ketsu studying her. “But you also left him behind, so maybe not.”

“He was fine.” Sabine dismissed. “Hera was still on planet so he could go back to the ship.” She explained to Ketsu and reassured herself at the same time.

“So if there wasn’t a ship for him to run home to you wouldn’t have left him?” Ketsu smirked.

“Well yes.” She admitted. “He’s part of the crew.” Sabine pulled a leg up onto the chair she sat in, swiveling to face Ketsu. "I couldn't leave him behind then."

“Is that the only reason?” Her old friend looked her over curiously “I’m just trying to figure out if I should be calling him your boyfriend.”

“What?!!” Sabine shook her head “Oh no no no no! Ezra is not my boyfriend. He may have a huge crush on me, but it is far from being returned!” She huffed, folding her arms across her leg and looking away.

Ketsu laughed “Alright little sister, calm down.” She hummed “I just want you to be happy.”

Sabine looked at her in disbelief “With him?”

The older girl cocked her head “Why not?”

Sabine opened her mouth to reply, but quickly shut it again. Why not Ezra?

“Oh I’ll tell you why not. He’s immature, clumsy, annoying…” she paused trying to think of more things to say. “He’s a kid!”

Ketsu laughed “You’re a kid, and that will change.” She smirked at Sabine’s glare.

“I’m not a kid!” the colorful Mando growled hugging her bent leg tighter.

“Alright, alright.” Ketsu acknowledged “Just remember, that boy is gonna grow up. Soon he’ll be taller than you and be able to stare down into your eyes lovingly. Then he can pick you up and pin you against a wall while he…”

“Ketsu!” Sabine shouted, a blush rapidly tinting her cheeks.

Her friend merely laughed “What? Just sayin’ you could use a little action.”

“I’ll find my action elsewhere thanks.” She pouted.

Ketsu nodded “Ok, but he’s right there and obviously in love with you.”

“Yeah I’m sure he is.” Sabine rolled her eyes. “But he’s fifteen, he’ll get over it.” Isn’t that how it worked?

Ketsu hummed in thought “Well, maybe. Are you saying crushes don’t grow deeper? It could happen you know. You’re only seventeen now, you’ll grow up too and maybe you’ll find out he’s more than what you see.”

“Who are you right now?” Sabine questioned. Ketsu wasn’t a believer in fairytales.

She chuckled “I’m the girl wondering if her little sister has a crush on her crewmate.”

Sabine sighed “No, I don’t. Can we please drop it?”

“M’kay. Keep me updated though.” She winked.

Sabine rolled her eyes and leaned her head on her knee. There was no way she’d ever like Ezra like that. He was just so…Ezra.

Then again he was pretty adorable sometimes. And he had a way of making her laugh.

No! She bit her lip. That wasn’t what she was supposed to think. 

..

The trade off went well and they were soon on their way.

Coming back to Garel they made their way to meet Hera, with Ezra standing right beside her. 

“There’s your boyfriend.” Ketsu whispered.

“Ketsu! NO!” Sabine hissed back.

They approached the two. “Congratulations on a successful mission. Thank you for helping our cause.” Hera addressed them both before focusing on the bounty hunter.

“Well, it was mostly an accident.” Ketsu admitted. “I'm not sure I'm ready for a full-on fight with the Empire just yet.”

“No one ever is.” Hera said, just as wise as ever.

Ezra stepped up and Ketsu smirked.

“I'm Ezra. We almost blasted each other earlier.” He introduced himself.

“I know who you are.” Ketsu said. “Sabine told me all about you.” She added watching the boy’s expression get excited.

Sabine could only groan inwardly at this mess unfolding before her. She hoped he wouldn’t get the wrong idea.

“She did? Well, uh, what, what'd she say? I mean, it was all good, right?” the boy was clearly flustered and definitely had the wrong idea.

“Ezra, can I get a moment here?” Sabine dismissed him, but he didn’t move.

“Sure.” He grinned lopsidedly for a moment before realizing what she'd meant, “Oh! Uh, you mean, you two, uh… a moment, right. Um, I'll just be over there.”

He slinked away quickly and Ketsu smiled.

_ She better not be thinking what I think she’s thinking.  _ Sabine thought. _ Better talk fast before she does. _

“You could've left me on that shuttle, taken the droids and made a good profit.” Sabine said catching her attention.

“It's only money.” She felt the familiar feelings of camaraderie welling up once again.

“Thank you.” Sabine smiled.

“It must be nice to have people backing you up. I had that once, when we were friends. Haven't had that since.” Ketsu frowned.

Sabine wanted so badly just to tell her she could have that if she joined as well, but knew Ketsu worked at her own pace. “Look, if you think you'd want to help us out, make a difference, just let us know.” Sabine said trying to sound hopeful.

“I'll think about it.” She agreed and said goodbye before heading back to her ship.

Sabine was glad to have reunited and fixed her relationship with Ketsu. She smiled to herself as she headed back to the Ghost. She’d always admired her in the past and felt a special connection to her. it was nice to have that back, if even for a moment.

“So, you didn’t kill each other.” Ezra joined her as she walked.

Sabine sighed “Nope. We almost did though.”

“Well I’m glad you didn’t.” He grinned.

She side-glanced him. Poor boy must have been worried about her. She shook her head as Ketsu’s words came back to her.  He’d grow up eventually. Who knows what he’ll be like then?

Would he be more serious and less inclined to flirt with her? Let’s be honest, he’ll probably end up like Kanan. Smooth talking, cocky, headstrong, strong, caring, talented, utterly devoted to the woman he loves…

She snapped her thoughts back in line.

No.

Ezra was just Ezra.

Sabine tried to push thoughts of him out of her head. Pretty hard to do when he was still walking next to her.

She ditched him quickly when she got back to the Ghost. Opting to stay in her room after a debrief with Hera.

She could hear Ezra and Zeb arguing about something even with her door shut. Then again the Ghost was hardly soundproof. Some days, if it was quiet enough, you could hear practically everything. Which consequently is how she’d found out about Kanan and Hera being more than just crewmates.

Talk about awkward.

It was also how she’d overhead Ezra trying to talk to Zeb about her when he first came on board. She’d grinned at Zeb’s confrontational replies and how he’d warned Ezra that even though she could beat him up on her own if he tried anything, he would also answer to the purple lasat as well. She could imagine Zeb’s angry scowl and the way he would shove a fist into his palm for effect.

So far she’d had seen different reactions to the kid’s crush on her. Zeb laughed at Ezra most of the time for liking her, knowing rightly that she was out of his league. Kanan seemed indifferent to it if not a little annoyed at the way Ezra wouldn’t pay attention to him when she was around. Hera seemed amused by it, but hadn’t commented much yet. Ketsu had been the most shocking so far.

Why would she think Sabine could ever love Ezra?

The helmet collecting lothrat wasn’t her type…at all.

Sure she cared for him. She’d protect him no matter what, but that’s because he was part of the crew. Not special to her at all.

And yet…

There was a strange fondness she held just for him. She valued each member of their little makeshift family individually, but maybe because he was so alone when they’d found him, or maybe because he was close to her age, she found herself attaching to him more.

Did that stop her from being annoyed at his constant pestering?

No.

But the kid had spirit. She could respect that.

 

 


	15. Rex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set after "The Lost Commanders" Season 2 episode 3.  
> A conversation between Rex and Sabine. Some Rexsoka if you're into that. If not that's cool it doesn't have to be.

 

 

Sabine had been working hard to diagnose the Phantom’s engine damage after the probe attack, but the sun had already gone down and minimal light sources weren’t helping her at all. She growled at the small circuitry and gave up, bowing her head. It would have to wait till morning.

“Hey.” A voice broke the quiet. She looked up to see Rex was approaching her with a plate of what must be Joopa meat. “Thought you might want something to eat.” He held it out for her and she removed her helmet, accepting gratefully. Sitting down next to her he cleared his throat. “I know it’s not good enough, but I’d like to apologize for what happened today.”

She glanced at him appraisingly. “It’s fine. You didn’t know. You’re not to blame.” She tore into the meal wondering more about the clone beside her. What were his motivations in all this? “So.” She swallowed a bite. “If you were such good friends with Ahsoka, why are you way out here while she fights the Empire?”

Rex sighed heavily, the weight of years past in his voice. “I honestly thought she’d been killed. Or at least never wanted to see me again.”

At the last bit of his statement Sabine started to turn over in her mind just what Ahsoka meant to him. Why would he assume she’d never want to see him? Did he do something to hurt her? Was there a misunderstanding? When he didn’t elaborate she asked “So now that you know she’s alive, why won’t you come with us?”

He shook his head “I’m not what I used to be. A lot has happened over the years and I just don’t know if…”

He paused and Sabine decided to take a stab at figuring out what their relationship had been. “You don’t know if what? If she’s still in love with you?”

His face showed clear shock for a moment as he turned to her. “You have some imagination kid.” He scoffed.

“Oh I don’t think I do.” Sabine smiled, toying with the food on her plate. “You obviously care for her and you’ve had quite a history with her. She seemed excited to find you and practically threatened Kanan, telling him to trust you.” Sabine paused, glancing at the old soldier. “And not to be nosy, but I read some of the messages she sent you.”

It was true that none of the messages were out right confessions of deepest darkest secrets, but the pleading tone and vague references to the past had Sabine even more interested. One she’d managed to read had said “I haven’t forgotten your promise to me.” What promise exactly?

“Look kid, Commander Tano and I fought side by side for years. We protected each other, we had each other’s backs, but when we decided to split up, for her safety, and I never heard from her again, I felt like I’d let her down.” He ran a hand over his shaved head. “Why would she need someone as useless as I am?”

Sabine took pity on the clone beside her “I don’t think you’re useless.” She took another bite to mull over her thoughts.

“We’ve served what little purpose we had. I don’t even know if I’d be of any use to her now.” He was silent for a moment as she ate. “If you don’t mind me asking, how is Commander Tano? I know you guys said she needed help, but how is she really?”

Sabine tilted her head “Well, I don’t know much about her. Hera would know more I think, but from what I do know she seems like she’s been distracted by something lately. She didn’t come with us because of her investigation of a Sith Lord we ran into.”

“A Sith?” Rex’s eyes went wide. “She wasn’t going to go after it was she?”

Sabine could hear the clear concern in his voice. “I don’t think so.” She said hesitantly “Has she faced them before?” She was hopeful now, if Ahsoka had more experience in fighting the Sith, then maybe her help could keep Kanan and Ezra alive.

“She fought many enemies in our time together. During the siege of Mandalore she faced off against Maul.” Rex shook his head “I believe she could’ve beaten him if things hadn’t…” He sighed deeply.

“So you were there?” she questioned “You were the ones helping Bo-Katan’s forces drive him away?”

He nodded “Yeah that was us. You must’ve been just a baby back then.”

She nodded “I think I was about two, but I heard the stories while growing up.”

“You know, most of us clones were trained and somewhat adopted by Mandalorians. We were given the traditions and raised with that culture. Family and honor meant everything to us.” He smiled fondly “And it seems you were raised that way too ad’ika.”

She was stunned at first, but then smiled widely at the familiar term meaning something akin to little one. Hearing someone call her that way out here was a pleasant surprise. “I was taught well enough.” she puffed out her chest feeling pride and a small sting of loss. 

He chuckled “Well, you must be quite the warrior then.”

When she’d finished her meal she placed it aside. “Can I ask you a question?”

He nodded “Sure kid, anything.”

“Have you always known Jedi to be reckless?” She was amused at his sudden jovial laughter.

“Is this about Kanan and Ezra? Are they like that too?” He chuckled “Yeah, my Jedi general had a reputation for that and I’ll admit, Commander Tano followed his every step. But there were other Jedi that were more subdued.”

“Well, from what I’ve seen so far with Kanan and Ezra, I can only imagine what you must’ve gone through.” she tucked her colorful hair behind her ear, peeking over to him.

Rex had a smile and a distant look in his eyes. “Yeah…those were some of the best days though. Kept us from getting bored at least.”

She huffed “Yeah, or gets you almost killed.”

He shrugged “That too.” There was a companionable silence between them before he spoke again. “Let’s get inside for now. You can finish repairs when daylight comes.”

He stood and extended an arm to her, helping her up. She closed up the Phantom and followed Rex inside. This certainly was an adventure they had gotten themselves in. Sabine found her thoughts wandering as she listened to Zeb and Gregor telling stories of adventures, with Ezra chiming in every now and then.

Kanan had removed himself to one corner and Rex and Wolffe were having a whispered conversation in the other.

Tomorrow would bring a new day and Sabine could fix up their transport and they would be on their way back to the fleet. She hoped they would be lucky enough to leave before the Empire could show up. She glanced towards the former clone captain, wondering if he would change his mind about going with them. He didn’t seem so bad, despite how Kanan made all of the clones sound, and she secretly wanted to see Ahsoka and him reunited.

From what she’d read in the messages and the way he’d smile when he spoke about her lead Sabine to suspect something deeper than friendship might exist.

Then again, it could be nothing. She yawned and curled up in the chair she was in. She smiled as Zeb recounted the story of one of their missions on Lothal. She’d had fun on that one.

She glanced at Kanan. His face was still set in the disapproving scowl he’d picked up the moment he knew these men were clones. She wondered if he’d ever learn to trust Rex and realized that she herself had some trust issues, but if someone was willing to prove their worth she’d give them a chance.  

Rex seemed like an honorable man and a good soldier, so Sabine decided she could take a chance and put a little faith in him if he came with them. He may call himself useless, but let’s be honest, the rebellion could use all the help it could get.

 

 


	16. A talk with Uncle Rau

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sabine is somewhat interrogated by her new space uncle Rau. Set after season 3 episode 7 "Imperial Supercommandos" obviously...not sure when exactly though.

 

Sabine sat on base, watching a training session of some of the recruits.

She had been passing by when she recognized the fighting style they were engaging in. She drew nearer to the group and found it was Fenn Rau that was teaching. That would explain it. 

Rau had joined the Rebellion and quickly became a trainer for the starfighter pilots. Not only in flight simulation, or actual mockup battles in space, but in physical fighting techniques as well. 

 

Sitting down on a crate to the side, she reviewed the familiar forms in her head along with them. She had been taught this as a child. 

She smirked as Rau effortlessly took down another rebel pilot. These poor people had no idea what they were up against. 

Standing straight and looking around he caught sight of her. He apparently instructed the others to take a break, as they all split up and he made his way toward her. 

Their relationship hadn’t started on the best note. In fact, when they first met, she had wanted to end him for nearly killing Hera. 

Instead, he had been captured by Kanan, and for a year she found herself drifting back to him in his cell and trying to convince him to join the Rebellion. 

Kanan had suggested that maybe because she was Mandalorian herself, she could talk him over to their side. But Kanan didn’t know about the lies Rau had been fed concerning her.

Getting to know him more had been a difficult and slow process, but eventually she could sort of forgive him for what had happened to Hera,(with Hera and Kanan’s insistence) and truly see how he and his group could be an asset to their cause. She never got the chance however to gain his support before the massacre of his forces by the Empire and Gar Saxon. Subsequently he decided to join the rebels after their escape from Concord Dawn’s moon, claiming that it was her values and actions that spoke to him. After that, they’d become a bit closer, and she looked up to him in some ways as a rolemodel. 

“Hello Sabine. Care to go a few rounds? I hope you’ve kept up your fighting skill more than you have your cu'bikad skill.” She had been getting better at the Mandalorian strategy game, but he still beat her quite a bit. 

“Well I didn’t have anyone to play with over the years away from home, but I had plenty of people to fight with.” she smirked.

He chuckled lightly crouching by her crate and rummaging through a bag placed there. He stood, taking a drink from a canteen that he’d plucked out. “You practice with your crew?” he inquired.

“Sometimes.” she pulled an ankle up and tucked it under her opposite thigh. 

Rau moved to her other side where there was more room on the crate and sat down. “And what about the other times?”

She cocked her head knowing what he would say. “I practice by myself.”

He grunted “And you don’t take every opportunity you can to knock Bridger into the dust?”

She laughed. Ok, not what she was expecting him to say. She had thought he’d comment on how ineffective solo training became after a long enough time. Eventually you tend to forget what facing a real opponent feels like. 

“He’s getting pretty good actually, but that could just be his Jedi reflexes working for him.” she muttered, feeling the slightest bit of envy.

“The Jedi are a strange anomaly.” He drank from his canteen again. “Some even say unnatural. But, their abilities do indeed make them formidable foes.” He admitted. 

There was a lull in their talk and she watched the pilots he’d been training mill around in groups. 

“Speaking of Bridger.” Rau began. 

Sabine wondered what Rau had a problem with this time. It’s true his initial seeming dislike for Ezra had turned into a mutual understanding of position, but that didn’t stop him from finding fault with the boy here and there.

“He likes you.” Rau said matter-of-factly. 

Sabine half laughed half scoffed “Well that’s old news.”

“And you like him?” Rau had phrased it as a question, but his tone was stern.

There was no way she’d ever let it slip that she did to anyone. Well, anyone but Hera that is. Hera always had a way of knowing things about people and especially how to get into the young Mandalorian’s head. It’s not like she came out and told Hera, ‘Hey I think I like Ezra’, but she knew Hera had always speculated her feelings for him and been right. Sabine had never admitted it out loud though.

She scoffed “Me? Like him? Are you serious?” she tried to be as convincing as possible. “Why would you ev-”

Rau waved a hand to stop her “No, no I understand.” 

She raised an eyebrow in suspicion. “You understand what?” 

“That you are much better than him and you’d only accept a strong partner. Bridger may be a fledgling Jedi, but he’s far from the worthy opponents they used to be in the old days. I guess they can’t all be legendary.” His voice lilted in apparent disappointment at the end.

She felt herself getting annoyed at his constant tearing down of Ezra’s qualities.

“Ok listen, Ezra’s still learning. He wasn’t raised from birth to be a Jedi, or however that worked a long time ago.” She found her voice a little too harsh and backed off. “And he is strong in his own ways.” she looked away toward the far end of the training area. “Even if he is annoying.”

She heard Rau chuckle “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were making a case for him to become yours, not against him.” He was smirking when she looked back to him in surprise. 

“I what?” she asked incredulously. “You must be joking.” She wanted nothing more than to bolt from the spot, but knew that any attempt to leave or change the subject too quickly would verify to Rau his theory was correct. She had to be smart and play his game. Use strategy.

“First of all, he’s annoying. Second of all, he’s not one of us.” She hoped that by playing the Mandalorian pride card she could get out of this mess.

“Does that matter?” Rau asked “He could easily be adopted into the culture.” It was true. Technically it didn’t matter if he was Mandalorian, but it was mostly preferable to be with someone that could understand your beliefs and customs.  “You could teach him-”

She sighed, interrupting him. “Look, I thought you didn’t like him. So why are you trying to get  _ me _ to like him?” There! She could finally dismiss this whole conversation. 

Rau huffed “It’s true I think he’s arrogant, childish, and no match for you.” He sounded like a father reprimanding her about her choice in a date. “But…” she looked back to him as he spoke again. “You should have seen the way he worried over you on Concord Dawn when you were fighting Saxon. Poor kid could’ve had a heart attack.”

She rolled her eyes “Ok, now I’m confused. You say something bad, but then tell me something good about him? What exactly are you trying to say? That I  _ should _ like him?” What was he getting at anyway?

She watched his shoulders rise and fall “Do you?” his inquiring gaze bored into hers.

She growled “I don’t see a point to this conversation. Ezra is part of the Ghost crew and family. Of course we worry about each other, and I know he likes me, but I don’t exactly need a man in my life.” she folded her arms over her chest.

His hand came to her shoulder “I know you don’t ad’ika. But when you do, make sure it’s not him.” Was he joking? She couldn't tell through the sly smile on his face.

She laughed and shook her head “I’ll be careful.” It was a lie, but she had to play this out to the end. 

“Good. Now, care to join in the fun and kick around a few of these green recruits?” He pointed at the group he’d just left. 

A wide grin touched her face. “Sounds like a great idea.”

He smiled at her proudly and stood. “Then let’s show them how a real fight looks.” 

Following him out onto the sparring floor she inwardly laughed, wondering what he would do if he knew her feelings for the young Jedi. Squaring up, she tried to imagine what his face would look like if she blurted out “I’m going to marry Ezra and you can’t stop me!” she snickered to herself at the image.

“Something funny?” Rau questioned taking position. The recruits had formed a circle to all get a good view. 

“Just excited.” she smiled smugly. 

“We’ll see about that.” He taunted.

 


	17. Colors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set in early season 2.

 

Colors.

Across the galaxy you could find amazing displays of natural and manufactured hues, blending together into the fabric of existence.

Sabine Wren loved colors.

She dreamed in colors, she lived in colors, she created in colors, and she had come to associate her fellow colleagues with certain colors as well.

Hera was always lively and bold. Her soft green skin, bright jumpsuit, and her auroral eyes sparkling in amusement or glowing in a passion for her rebellion, had become her colors.

Kanan’s tones were more subtle and subdued, but Sabine could see the bravery in him. The fact that he mirrored Hera slightly was really none of her business, but colors don’t lie.

Zeb was a hearty and strong mix of purples. His clothing contrasted against his natural hue, breaking up the patterns and presenting an audacious courage to him.

Chopper was bold like Hera. His colors and lines showed he was stubborn and mechanical, but utterly loyal and independent.

Sabine prided herself on being a whirlwind of shades. Her reflection would never be dull, just as she herself was never satisfied with being mediocre. She excelled in everything she put her mind to and that showed in her individuality and color scheme.

The Empire, with its monochromatic schemes, was anything but what she wanted to see. She hated the Empire and how it tried to suppress the zest of the galaxy.

She’d seen the ugliness in the Empire and the beauty in the many worlds they’d visited, but she found one person in particular that was absolutely vibrant.

Ezra.

Ezra was a mix of adventurous and vivacious hues. His luminous eyes and sunny clothing were offset by his nightsky hair. She even found herself captivated in his cerulean orbs from time to time.

She smiled to herself as she mixed her colors to be his hair’s perfect shade of dark blue. She was painting her fairly new forged family on the ceiling of her room and had chosen her colors with care.

She looked up and her grin widened. There they were, all smiling and beaming down at her. Even Ezra, whom she’d drawn in Zeb’s powerful headlock.

She could almost hear their banter and see Ezra struggling to get free of the lasat’s iron grip.

She paused and glanced around.

There were so many colors covering her room, but the brightest and her most favorite by far, were in her makeshift family above her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's so short I've been really busy! Song: The Technicolor Phase by Owl City.


	18. Missing you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set during Zero Hour

 

Sabine glanced around the room at her family.   
It was nice to have her blood relations back in her life, but there was a surprising hole in her heart. She originally had a chasm where her family had been when she left Mandalore, but over time she had come to fill it slowly with the existence of a new type of family.   
When Kanan had found her, that divide was empty and she felt hollow. By the time he had brought her back to her ancestral home, that space had become replete with memories and love of her surrogate family.   
Studying her brother’s face she felt a twinge of loneliness and regret that she hadn’t been there when Saxon had enlisted him, most likely forcefully, to be part of his group of imperial commandos.   
Tristan deserved so much better.  
She worried for her father, still in captivity on Mandalore, and saw her mother’s strength as she dealt with the choices that had been made.   
Sabine had feared that her family wouldn’t want anything to do with her, but now they were fighting side by side against the Empire.  
Her thoughts drifted out into the cosmos to a familiar planet and rebel base. She often thought about Atollon, and the work and friends she’d left behind. Sabine wondered what they were doing at that moment. No doubt they were finishing plans to strike Lothal.   
Her heart dropped again. Her work here was crucial to her clan, but she knew how important the objective to free Lothal was to Ezra and the others. Especially to Ezra.   
She mentally shook herself.   
No.  
No time for sorrows. He was freeing his home, she was freeing hers.  
She focused again on the holo viewer in front of her. She needed to be ready and aware of their strategy.   
“Countess Wren.” A voice spoke through her mother's commlink. “We have an incoming Mandalorian vessel. The pilot identified himself as Ezra Bridger.”  
Her mother's eyes met her own and a question was visible in them.   
Sabine shook her head. “I didn't call him.”  
Why was Ezra here? And why in a Mandalorian ship of all things? How had he gotten one?   
Ursa Wren answered the comm. “Clear him for landing and escort him to my location.”  
“Your boyfriend is back.” Tristan's lips twitched in a slight smile, his eyes teasing her. “I guess he couldn’t stay away.”  
She scowled lightly at her brother “Tristan you know he's not my-”  
She was cut off by their mother. “We have no time for jokes or social calls. Find out what he wants and send him back to his rebellion.”  
Sabine knew her mother was grateful to Kanan for taking care of her and bringing her home, but Ezra, unfortunately, was less of a Jedi and more of a child to her.   
When Ezra entered the room and her heart leapt, Sabine knew she'd missed him too much. She turned to see him and couldn't keep her lips from pulling tight in a suppressed smile.   
“Ezra. What are you doing here?  
…  
After a quick explanation and a heartfelt plea, a plan was set into motion to help the rebels escape from their base and the imperial onslaught.

She checked her armor and helmet one last time. Making sure her weapons were in place, she followed Ezra out to the landing platform to see a sight she had not expected. The ship Ezra had come in was definitely familiar, but not in a good way.   
“That's not…” she paused hoping she was wrong. “Is that Maul’s ship?”  
She looked at him tentatively. Why was Ezra flying Maul’s ship?  
“Yeah.” He answered.   
She waited for an explanation but he just frowned as though there was something he wasn't sure about telling her.   
“What happened Ezra?” She found her voice was softer than normal.   
“Maul’s gone.” He didn't look her straight in the eye as he explained. “He won't be bothering anyone anymore.”   
Her brow knit and her hand reached out to his arm. “Did you….”  
He shook his head. “No. I didn't kill him.” He turned slightly toward her and glanced around. He leaned closer and she almost thought he would kiss her.   
She fought the urge to jump back, but when he whispered to her, she stayed close.   
“I met master Kenobi. He dealt with Maul.”  
Sabine’s eyes widened.   
“I thought he was dead!” She hissed quietly.  
Ezra held a finger to his lips. “Don't tell anyone alright?”  
She shook her head in disbelief. “I don't understand.” Thoughts raced through her mind of how recent events could have taken place. Was there another Jedi joining the fight? Where had he been all this time? Was he like Kanan had been and keeping his abilities secret for the most part?  
“Sabine.” Her brother approached them on the landing area. “Sorry, did I interrupt something?” The cocky smirk on his face was enough to make Sabine roll her eyes.   
“No.” Sabine crossed her arms. “What is it?”   
He shifted his grip on his helmet. “We're ready when you are.”

Sabine glanced at Ezra and saw his determination. She now had to make it her own. “Let's move out!” She ordered.   
“Hey Sabine.” Ezra caught her attention. “I missed you.” He smiled softly and she jammed her helmet on to keep her blush hidden.   
“I missed you too. Now move.” She grinned and nudged him toward the ship. 


	19. Asking For Help

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set after season 3 finale.

“Hey.” Sabine approached Ezra slowly. He was still sitting in the gunner seat, staring out the view port. A habit of his when he wanted to be alone. “I hope I’m not intruding.”   
He leaned back a little, shifting to look at her. “No.” He smiled, but it was fleeting and forced. He went back to staring at the stars.   
She stood beside him wondering if this was the best time to ask his help.   
“Thank you.” He spoke softly. “I thought for a moment that you wouldn't help us, but-”

She was shocked. “Ezra. I would never leave you helpless. I would never abandon our family in a time of need.”   
He smirked, seeming amused.  “Our family huh?”   
She gently shoved his shoulder “You think of them the same way.”  
He shrugged “Yeah.”  
She paused for a moment and sighed. “Ezra, I want to ask you a favor.”   
He perked up and turned to face her. “What is it?”  
She shook her head lightly “You don't have to, but I'd like your help in rescuing my father from the Empire.”  
His eyebrows rose. “Really? I mean yeah, did Hera say we're going?”  
She frowned. “Hera’s priority is the rebellion, but I think Kanan is willing. I just wanted to ask you personally. It would mean postponing your mission to Lothal.”  
His lips tightened “Yeah, but that's already been delayed now.”  
“I'm sorry Ezra.” She could see how frustrating it would be to have your plans thrown out the airlock and the fleet nearly demolished.   
“It's not your fault.” He assured “You helped us escape, of course I would come and help you free your father.”  
She smiled “Thank you Ezra”  
She turned to leave, but he called her back “Hey Sabine.”  
“Yeah?” She looked at his grinning face. It was good to see a real smile.   
“You think you can get me one of those jet packs?”  
She laughed lightly “I'll see what I can do.”   
She bit her lip and smiled as she walked away. There were certainly interesting times ahead of them. 

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Drabbles of Ezra Bridger](https://archiveofourown.org/works/9306710) by [Ciryc_Tal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ciryc_Tal/pseuds/Ciryc_Tal)




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